Donate

Will Obama's Hair Please Just Go Gray So the Media Can Shut Up About It?

News

For years now, the media has waited with bated breath for Barack Obama's hair to turn totally gray. The stresses of the job are supposed to do this to a president, we've been told. But why is it taking so long? The media is always right about such important matters. The only answer:conspiracy. The Daily Mail has decided Obama is now dyeing his hair "jet-black" to cover up all the "grey," because it noticed Obama looked different in a photo taken in bright sunlight than a more recent photo taken inside in a dark room. Dyeing is cheating, Obama! Sure, that prayer hog Gabrielle Giffords has taken all of God's miracles for herself, but you should have to live with being gray.


It's being seen as the most important visit by a Chinese leader in 30 years and, with all the world's eyes on him, who can blame Barack Obama for wanting to look his best.

For it appears that he has dyed his greying hair jet-black - giving him a new more youthful look.

Yes, how could Obama possibly look cooler than Hu Jintao and his ridiculous hipster glasses? Only hair dye. Damn Brits.

If this is true, Obama's flag pin got a dye job too. Look how white it is in the first photo! The pin and Obama must have gone on a makeover teevee show together, because if you look at that first photo, Obama doesn't even have any eyes! What an amazing transformation. Those eyes really look real. Must have been expensive. And to top it all off, his skin is darker now, because he's racist against being white. [Daily Mail]

$
Donate with CC

Barack Obama delivered his first major address of his post-presidency Tuesday at an event in Johannesburg, South Africa, honoring the 100th anniversary of Nelson Mandela's birth. It was -- as you'd expect for the occasion -- appropriately dignified and thoughtful. It was also every bit as inspiring as you might expect from the first black American president speaking in memory of the first black president of a nation that for most of its modern history was synonymous with apartheid. Let's take some time to bask in what an actual world leader sounds like, shall we?

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC

Guess what Vladimir Putin's getting for Christmas! He's been dropping hints, and you know the Big Orange Baboon can't say no to him for some unknown reason. Gonna be so cute when little Vladdy stumbles down the stairs in his PJs, brushes the sleep from his eyes, and finds MONTENEGRO all wrapped up with a big bow under the Christmas tree. Adorbz!

Oh, but we are to kid! Just a little levity as President Treasonweasel slams a sledgehammer into the international framework that kept us out of another world war for the past 70 years. So why are we suddenly talking about a tinyass country whose chief export appears to be consonants? (Sorry, Montenegro. But your Predsjednik Crne Gore is Milo Đukanović, and your capital city is Cetinje, which is just cheating at Scrabble.)

Well! Donald Trump just got out of a two-hour, closed-door meeting with Vladimir Putin, whose government tried to stage a coup in 2016 to assassinate Đukanović and stop Montenegro's accession to the European Union. Which might not be a coincidence!

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC
Donate

SINGLE & MONTHLY DONATIONS

SUPPORT THE CAUSE - PAYPAL DONATION

PAYPAL RECURRING DONATIONS

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc