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Pollsters are hilarious sometimes. Talking Points Memo has the results of a new poll from Public Policy Polling, asking people which do they like better:  The Duggar family, kid-touching and all, or Barack Obama? You will be so shocked to find out that a full 67% of folks who voted for Mitt Romney in 2012 still like the Duggars better than Obama, whereas 87% of Obama voters think Obama is better than kid-touchers and the people who cover for them. THERE'S YOUR PARTISAN DIVIDE, AMERICA.


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But come on, how can you expect Republicans to side with Obama, when they've had Fox News drilling into their empty skulls the last 6 years how President Obama is a secret Kenyan Muslim usurper who hates America and apologizes to our enemies for how much America sucks, and also is probably preparing RIGHT NOW to invade Texas so that he can round up all the Good Christian Americans and send them to FEMA camps where they will be put to work building Obamaphones for gang members? Josh Duggar only molested 5 girls, including 4 of his sisters, whereas Obama molested (and also Katrina-ed and 9/11-ed) ALL OF AMERICA.

Show us on the doll where Barack Obama touched Lady Liberty:

  • He did Fast and Furious to America by personally taking guns to Mexico and selling them for cash, so they could be used to kill Americans, DUH.
  • And then there was IRSgate, when Obama decided to do fascism to all the Teabagger-Americans with extra tough IRS scrutiny, except for how the IRS actually scrutinized liberal groups more than wingnut groups. Still waiting for that apology.
  • BENGHAZI!!!!!111! BENGHAZZZZIIII!!!!!! Ahem, Benghazi.
  • Solyndra. That was a thing, right? No, we're having a hard time remembering what all the wingnut assholes were chapped about with that one too.
  • We still haven't seen Obama's long-form birth certificate. No not THAT one, silly, the REAL ONE, the one Orly Taitz has been after.
  • That time Barack Obama bowed to Saudi King Abdullah, which proved that Obama is gay married to Islam and probably a terrorist who hates America. If only Obama had gotten on his knees and sucked Abdullah off the way Dubya used to ...
  • Oh, LOL, the worst Obama Molestation Scandal of all, when poor hack and convicted felon Dinesh D'Souza had to go to prison, just because he committed a crime and was sentenced to prison. D'Souza is convinced that Obama personally orchestrated it. Hell, he probably snuck into D'Souza's room late at night, just like Josh Duggar did with his victims, but instead of molesting D'Souza's no-no parts, Obama probably molested D'Souza's MIND and convinced him to commit the crime in the first place.

We rest our case, Barack Obama is worse than Josh Duggar's diddle-fingers, QED, also, too.

[Talking Points Memo]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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