Desperate Milo Tries To Shock Us All By Opening 'Ex-Gay' Torture Center
Last week, has-been right-wing troll Milo Yiannopoulos announced he is now "ex-gay," likely hoping to be welcomed back into the conservative fold by adopting some of the socially conservative behaviors he had previously rejected. Maybe he was hoping for some legitimate outrage from the left. Alas, all he got were a few jokes about how the how-to-be-hetero tips he was getting on Parler (before he was kicked off) included "learning to drive stick."
So now he's got a new plan that will totally shock us all. In an interview published today in The New York Post, Yiannopoulos announced his plans to open a gay conversion center in Florida. Is that controversial enough for everyone yet? A thing frequently described as "torture" and condemned by pretty much every mental health authority in America? Hmm?
He claims people are very into it and want to give him lots of money so that they, too, can be "ex-gays." To be fair, if they're Trumpers, I can't imagine anyone would complain about them self-deporting from the dating pool.
"This has been the easiest thing to raise money for that I've ever done. There is an enormous demand for this among people who believe they've been led astray by — it sounds silly to call it this — but you know, the gay establishment," Yiannopoulos said.
"I think part of that is the resurgence of religious, socially conservative, kind of reactionary politics among noisy young conservatives," he explained, adding that he has "people who are kind of like DMing me now" to ask "'where do I send the f–king check?' You know, like, get me in your program."
Oh, sure. That is definitely happening. Sign up for Milo's "How To Be Straight" class and you too can be a heterosexual male ... or just look like one. Or just look like Milo Yiannopoulos doing an impression of what he thinks a straight man would look like.
Milo's new "macho" Gab avatar.
Yiannopoulos also told the Post that he plans to rehabilitate the image of conversion therapy the way he totally destroyed feminism.
"My aspiration is to rebrand, revitalize, rehabilitate what they call 'conversion therapy' for two new generations in the same way that I obliterated feminism for two generations, because it's dying, and horribly maligned, ridiculed and prosecuted industry. It's an industry in crisis, but it's an industry whose addressable market has never been larger," he said, referring to his past critique of third-wave feminism as a main topic of a number of campus lectures he gave while working at Breitbart.
Except feminism is still around, and in most discernible ways, Milo is not. It's going to be really hard for him to rehab anything, given that he has no public platform.
Yiannopoulos is far from the first to follow this particular path. Several years ago, rape advocate Roosh V — who built an entire career writing misogynistic guides for men on how to pick up and sleep with women across the globe — announced he had converted to Armenian Apostolic Orthodox Christian and had now realized that sex before marriage is bad and no one should do it. This happened, coincidentally, after he was roundly rejected by the alt-right for being a non-white man who bragged about having sex with white women.
Notably, after getting rejected from Trumpland, Milo's mentor Steve Bannon also got religion, even planning to start a nominally Catholic "alt-right" training academy in a monastery outside Rome. Unsurprisingly, that idea was rejected by the Vatican.
Milo's path follows a similar trajectory. After getting booted from Twitter and Breitbart years ago, continually rejected by his peers, and now banned from Parler for saying gay people should be hanged and offering $500 to people who shoot "illegal immigrants" with AK-47s. Even on Gab, which hasn't banned him yet, he's only getting like eight comments on each thing he posts. This is likely the only route he has left to try, if he wants to retain some semblance of notoriety.
Except it's not going to work. As with both Roosh and Bannon, his problem, among right-wingers, was never that he was insufficiently holy, but rather that he had outlived his usefulness to them. He was infinitely more useful to the religious right as an influential right-wing troll who also happened to be gay than he would be as an "ex-gay" holy roller no one actually cares all that much about.
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Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse