Donate

Lovers of freedom should probably "get their knickers in a twist" over this chilling news: Joseph Farah, leading birther and editor in chief of WND, wascaught with a loaded .38 caliber revolver in his carryon at Washington DC's Dulles International Airport. We bet he had a perfectly legitimate reason to be carrying a gun while flying, like maybe he's a secret agent for the American Patriot Police, and his classification is so secret that not even the TSA has been briefed on it yet! Or maybe Farah was going to write an exposé about the TSA's inability to find his gun, only someone tipped them off (because otherwise they couldn't find it, because X-Rays are a myth)? Certainly no Responsible Firearms Owner would ever deliberately try to break a law, or even carelessly "forget" that there was a gun in Joey Lou's Handbag? Or maybe...the TSA planted the gun as part of a false flag effort to seize everyone's guns!!!!! Oh, yeah. We'd go with that one, if we wrote for WND.


As the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) notes, Farah has grumbled many times about the TSA's “systematic violations of Americans’ constitutional rights,” describing security patdowns as "gate rape" and vowing in a 2010 column that he'd never fly again until TSA stopped being beastly and awful. Also, he complained because after the TSA searched his checked luggage, they didn't repack his bag very neatly, NOT AT ALL:

I had carefully folded my clothes before placing them in my bag. I had carefully separated the clean clothes from the dirty clothes. But what I found in my bag was that someone had pulled everything out and then stuffed it all back in with little regard for my future cleaning and laundering bills.

We know that occasionally Yr Wonkette grosses you out by invoking scary mental images like certain old, ugly politicians doing the nasty, and so we would today like to make up for it by having you imagine the sight of Joseph Farah fastidiously packing his suitcase, rolling his socks up into neat little balls. See, isn't that humorous vision amusing? That should certainly make up for the times we've made you think of John Boehner naked except for a garter belt and a strategically placed trout.

In a late-breaking update, we learn that Farah has come forward to explain himself. He doesn't even try to come up with a good conspiracy story, darn him. Turns out he was just really, really tired before his flight!

Somewhat groggy early Sunday, I actually searched my computer bag for my revolver. I’m licensed to carry in Virginia. I didn’t see it.

When I got to Dulles Airport, I put the bag on the security belt.

The TSA agents saw the gun and signaled me over.

At that moment, I was kicking myself for not thoroughly emptying the bag.

He also says "There is no excuse for my mistake," and says that the TSA agents "were very nice." What? Not jackbooted federal thugs? Also, he is licensed to carry a concealed weapon in several states; plus, he really needs that gun, because "I get death threats against me." And so he tells us all about the death threats against him, by telling the story of the one definite assault by a leftist against a rightwing group, the 2012 incident where a deranged guy shot and wounded a security guard at the Family Research Council. Farah tells us the story in chilling detail, and we kept waiting for him to say that the shooter had also threatened Joseph Farah, or that Joseph Farah was there that day, or that Joseph Farah was found on a list that the shooter carried...

But no. Here's the connection, and here's why Joseph Farah carries a gun at all times because his life is in danger: The guy who shot up the FRC said that one of the reasons he despised them was that the SPLC had called them a hate group. AND the SPLC, Farah reminds us, broke the story of his arrest, and they say that Joseph Farah is a hater, too, for no reason at all. Ergo, Joseph Farah has to have a gun on him, to protect himself from the SPLC's threats, and all the crazies motivated by the SPLC, like the one guy who shot at the FRC two years ago.

Farah also notes that "he's not making any excuses about my dumb mistake last Sunday." He just wants you to know that if it weren't for the raving paranoids at SPLC, he wouldn't have to be ready to kill at a moment's notice.

[SPLC / WND via TPM]

Follow Doktor Zoom on Twitter. He keeps his refrigerator stocked with beer in case he accidentally reads something by Joseph Farah.

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc