Everybody in his club has to get this hat.


Wingnut Queen Bee Joseph Farah, publisher of conspiracy theory clearinghouse WorldNetDaily and birther extraordinaire, has a bold new variation on his familiar theme that Barack Obama plans to engineer things so he never has to leave office. In this one, the nefarious Obama doesn't even have to stage a military coup under the pretense of a military exercise in Texas. While it's no doubt a huge disappointment to the Chinese troops still hiding in the tunnels under all the Wal-Marts, the new Obama President For Life Plan should at least stir up cognitive dissonance for wingnuts. You see, Farah proposes that maybe -- and he is just asking -- but maybe Obama will seize power forever after Hillary Clinton is elected by prosecuting her for the many crimes she and the Clinton Foundation did! (Or the Global Initiative -- they're only different in the real world, not in wingnut minds.) Oh noes! "Lock her up!" good...but Obama Forever bad!

In a WND column published Monday, Farah lays out how this could all go down, noting (without a single citation) that "we were told" the FBI was investigating the Clinton Global Initiative, and then FBI director James Comey said, nahh, man, not investigation, and then "sources" said yeah-huh, definitely an investigation. So what Farah wants to know is whether the contradictory leaks are all a clever ruse designed to make us think the Justice Department is capable of doing Justice? Of course not -- "This Justice Department is misnamed. It should be called the Injustice Department." Wow, what a master of wordplay he is. But then there's the more sinister possibility:

Suppose – just suppose now – that Obama is hedging his bets. What if he is actually using this FBI and this Injustice Department to do a real investigation intended to maintain his position as president? I have previously speculated, and that’s all it is I admit openly, pure informed speculation, that Obama has not completely abandoned the idea of remaining president past Jan. 20, 2017 [...]

So what if – and it’s a big “if” – Obama is holding something back? Suppose he has actually authorized a probe of what she did as secretary of state to benefit herself and the Clinton Foundation.

Is it possible he might use the findings – and, believe me, they are not hard to find – to indict her between Election Day and Jan. 17, while he is still president?

If she is indicted on serious charges, she will not be permitted to take the oath of office. Neither will Tim Kaine be permitted to assume the office of the president because he will not yet be vice president.

The whole thing will create a constitutional crisis. The next in line, House Speaker Paul Ryan, will not be allowed to assume the presidency, either, because there is a sitting president.

Fiendishly ingenious, completely logical -- if you assume that all previous conspiracy theories in which Obama and Clinton conspired together to bring down America were only cover stories -- and best of all, proof of exactly what a duplicitous schemer Barack Obama is! He's going to go out there and campaign for Hillary, help her beat back the challenge from Real American Donald Trump, and then stab her in the back, along with the American people, AGAIN!

So how would this play out? Farah imagines several very likely scenarios:

What might Obama do? He might declare a national emergency that permits him to remain in power until another election is held. Or, he might even stay on while and turn things over to the person he preferred to succeed him all along – Vice President Joe Biden. Or, he might even try to stay in power for another four years.

Oh good, a national emergency, so finally those Chinese troops can come out of the tunnels, where things are surely very cramped by now. But they might not even be necessary, because Obama has used his hypnotism mind rays to fool us all and delegitimize the real patriots in our once-great nation:

The polls show Obama, despite his breaches of the Constitution, despite his flouting of the law, despite his inflammatory rhetoric on race, despite his war on cops, despite his shocking foreign-policy failures, despite his flailing economy hanging on a thread, despite his lies about Obamacare, remains popular with a majority of the American public -- especially the low-information voter.

The Big Media love him. Only the alternative media challenge him.

The Republican Congress has never challenged him -- not on anything. Would you really expect it to begin in the heat of a “national emergency”?

You know how sinister Obama is? His lackeys in the leftist media, like Yr Wonkette, even mock Joseph Farah's wacakaloon conspiracy theories so people won't see this warning as the very real danger signal it is! (The real wonder is that he managed to write it without once referring to Saul Alinsky. Oversight, or clever ploy? YOU CAN NEVER TELL!) Sure all those low-information fools out there may think Obama doesn't have designs on staying in power forever, but that's only because none of the other conspiracy theories came to fruition -- maybe they were planted by Obama himself. So when he really does use the two months between the election and inauguration day to seize power forever, no one will be ready for it.

Farah notes, ominously, that while "the Constitution prohibits Obama from being elected to a third term, it doesn’t speak to a non-elected third term." It also doesn't say anything about mind control or chemtrails, which seems awfully suspicious when you think about it. Hell, maybe the system is so corrupt that even Donald Trump has no idea how far down the looking glass this rabbit hole goes:

Trump says the election is rigged. Maybe he just doesn’t even know how right he is.

Strangely, though, the WND Superstore continues to only accept payments in soon-to-be-worthless American Dollars, not gold or bartered ammunition

[WND via RightWingWatch]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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