Wonkette Announces Reader Aid Slush Fund NOT Overseen By Donald Trump
Friends, Wonkers, Terrible Ones, slush up our fund!
I am getting more and more worried about our friends (NOT US, WE'RE FINE, WE'LL TELL YOU WHEN WE'RE NOT) who are alone and just got (more) broke, and don't have any idea what to do about their rents and bills.
Because we are liberals and we solve problems by throwing money at them (AND WASHING OUR HANDS and STAY THE FUCK HOME), and we all want to help but didn't quite know how, we've decided to gofundme up a Wonkette Nation Slush Fund for YOU to donate to and US to distribute (possibly to you).
Should you trust me to oversee a slush fund? Absofuckinglutely. I even put it on my revenue spread sheet when you stick $20 cash in my bra, for to fork over the (too low, corporate rate) tax to Uncle Sam. Why, I've never even had a charity closed by the New York AG!
If you are a Wonker in Need, please email me at rebecca at wonkette dot com so we can get some cash in your Venmo/Paypal/carrier pigeon/bank account. We love you. And we worry. And shit, if you need a case of wine, you all just put too many $40ses in my Naked Wines account.
Ready, set, SPEND SOME MONEY.
This post will stay up top a while, so check for new stories below!
[CLICK HERE for the Wonk Nation Slush Fund GoFundMe]
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Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.