You Better Watch Out: Trump’s Having 12 Days Of COVID Celebrations At White House

White House

This is Donald Trump's last Christmas season in the White House, whether he likes it or not, and President Grinch is determined to expose as many people to COVID-19 as possible before he's thrown out next month.

Trump and the not-quite-first lady have a jam-packed holiday CHRISTMAS! schedule planned for the next few weeks. A president with a human soul might take a low-key approach to the season: COVID-19 has infected at least 13 million Americans. Millions are unemployed and struggling, and more than 265,000 Americans have died from the pandemic the president failed to contain because he never actually tried.

But Trump survived COVID-19 even if his "mercurial presidency" didn't, so why all the fuss over the virus when there's all that very real, totally not imaginary voter fraud threatening the outgoing president's ego? It's the holiday season, and Trump's gonna have some fun before Melania's smile melts away.

From the Washington Post:

The events, including a congressional ball on Dec. 10, will each include more than 50 guests and could risk the health of White House staff members and others who work at the parties. Most guests will not be tested in advance, one official said.

You know, Scrooge might've complained a lot about Christmas and shouted “Bah! Humbug" at Bob Cratchit, but he didn't callously expose his workforce to a highly infectious, potentially fatal disease. Scrooge was good that way.


Trump's Hell House insists on throwing at least 25 indoor parties this month despite a coronavirus surge that's only going to get worse once we start paying the price for Thanksgiving. Don't worry if an invitation doesn't show up in your mailbox. You won't need to personally attend the festivities to enjoy the open corona bar.

Trump has never modeled responsible behavior during the pandemic, and he bookended Amy Coney Barrett's Supreme Court confirmation with separate superspreader events. However, now he's encouraging mass stupidity during a period when families are taking time off work and desperately want to enjoy "normal" holiday celebrations.

My poor, sad brother, Jerome Adams, the US surgeon general, stressed again on "Good Morning America" last week that holiday celebrations should be “small" — under 10 people — and outdoors, if possible. That's not what the Trumps are doing and he was asked if he'd at least tried to talk to them out of killing more Americans. Just take the month off. It's Christmas, for God's sake!

ADAMS: We want everyone to understand that these holiday celebrations can be superspreader events, so we want them to be smart and we want them to be as small as possible.

Adams proceeded to beg viewers to visit the CDC website for tips on how to best stay alive until there's a vaccine. They might as well have a President Goofus and President-elect Gallant comic strip on there.

Stephanie Grisham, former part-time press secretary who was banished to Fuck Christmas Land with Melania Trump, swears up and down that these parties will be as safe as an axe-juggling contest at a fraternity party.

Grisham kindly detailed all the precautions taken for these needlessly risky holiday celebrations.

This includes smaller guest lists, masks will be required and available, social distancing encouraged while on the White House grounds, and hand sanitizer stations throughout the State Floor.

Guests will enjoy food individually plated by chefs at plexiglass-protected food stations. All passed beverages will be covered. All service staff will wear masks and gloves to comply with food safety guidelines. Attending the parties will be a very personal choice.

This is like a skydiving event where parachutes are “encouraged" and available. When Grisham claims that participating in this yuletide suicide is a “very personal choice," she ignores the people who have to show up because it's their damn job. I doubt they're getting hazard pay.

It's even worse now that the Trumps have already had COVID-19. This is like forcing your staff to play Russian Roulette for your entertainment without taking a turn yourself. And despite Grisham's reassurances, Trump's guests are already ignoring the most basic safety measures.

At the first such event Monday afternoon — a reception for volunteers who helped decorate the White House — guests were given champagne and snacks and mingled in the State Dining Room and the East Room, among other places. Some did not wear masks or adhere to social distancing, officials said.

Many guests will also travel to and from DC, even staying overnight, which violates a host of state and city restrictions. The Trumps truly represent the worst of us, and I'm reminded of how Nick Carraway summed up Tom and Daisy Buchanan:

They were careless people ... they smashed up things and creatures and then retreated back into their money or their vast carelessness or whatever it was that kept them together, and let other people clean up the mess they had made.

God bless us, everyone. We're gonna need it this year.

[Washington Post]

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes reviews for the A.V. Club and make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."

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