Andy Ogles Lost His Primary In Tennessee. Mashallah, Motherf*cker!
Also hooray for Justin Pearson!
The Tennessee primaries were last night, and there was good news, there was funny news, and there was Tennessee news. In Tennessee news, Marsha Blackburn won her primary to be the governor, and we are sorry for Tennessee’s loss there, because she will likely win the general. Tennessee gonna Tennessee.
In wonderful news, Justin Pearson, the member of the Tennessee Three from Memphis who has lately been crusading against Elon Musk’s foul data centers in the Memphis area, won his primary in the new version of the Ninth Congressional District, which was drawn earlier this year in a Republican effort to ban Black/Democratic voting representation in the state, after the white supremacist partisan hack Supreme Court ruled that doing that was just fine with them.
National Democrats think TN-09 is winnable. As it is the district we personally vote in, we agree. Especially since Pearson will be running against an incredible buffoon named Brent Taylor, a true walking “Kick me” sign of a man. But more on him some other day.
Hands down the funniest thing that happened last night happened in the primary for another one of those districts that now spans from Memphis to the Nashville suburbs. Tennessee’s Fifth District — truly a masterpiece of clownass racist gerrymandering — is currently represented in Congress by one of the stupidest, most bigoted, most inbred-looking buffoons on the planet, a man named Andy Ogles.
He is the man who recently tweeted that “homosexuality has no place in America.”
Who tweeted in March that “Muslims don’t belong in American society. Pluralism is a lie.”
Who tried to gin up a campaign last year to deport Zohran Mamdani, because, well, again, Andy Ogles is a pigfucking bigot.
And last night, voters decided to deport Andy Ogles’s bitch ass out of Congress.
Allahu akbar, asshole!
Donald Trump endorsed Ogles, but this is the second time this week voters told one of his endorsees to go fuck rocks, after one of his Michigan endorsees went down in flames Tuesday to a guy who had literally already dropped out of the race.
Tennessee Republican Governor Bill Lee didn’t endorse Ogles, though. At the last minute, he endorsed a man named Charlie Hatcher, a dairy farmer and former Ag commissioner, and that is the man who, in the upset of the night, with over 53 percent of the vote, won the primary and will go up against Democrat Chaz Molder in Tennessee’s Fifth. (This race could be winnable for the good guys too, but if you’re going to pick one, it’s far more likely to be the Ninth, especially after Ogles’s loss. Not to piss on our own joyful schadenfreude. But who knows in this environment!)
Hatcher was also endorsed by former Tennessee Governor Bill Haslam. There had been more signs that Ogles was in trouble, and really, he was just a scandal-plagued piece of shit. Yes, he’s the one who raised $23,000 to build a burial garden for stillborn infants, which was subsequently never built.
Here is one of Andy Ogles’s tweets about Bad Bunny’s Super Bowl halftime show:
Not sure what he thought was gay porn, but hey, maybe he got hard.
Then there was this one:
Andy Ogles definitely is bilingual and knows what Bad Bunny’s lyrics glorify. You betcha.
Finally, here are some Andy Ogles AI slop video depicting himself as — bless his heart — a Christian crusader. Against non-white immigrants, of course.
“We must stand and reaffirm that this is a Christian Nation,” Ogles tweeted with that second one. “This is a battle of good and evil.”
Andy Ogles is free to keep playing AI dress-up and doing that battle, but he’s gonna need to take it the fuck out of Congress.
Ma'a as-salāmah, yalla byeeeeeeeeee!
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In catty joy over this, allow me to share a totally inconsequential but still "what an asshole" story I have about this guy.
So, in the House Office Buildings, every house member has an office. Outside those offices are holders for three flags each near their name plate. Generally each office does American Flag, State Flag, and then some cause flag or local flag related to their district. Pride flags, heritage flags, you name it.
Ogles, because he is the kind of guy he is, put a FOURTH flag outside his door JUST to also add the Christian Flag (iirc his third was usually the POW flag?). To show off that he disapproves of the pride flags in the same hallway.
Also he kept putting up "wanted posters" in the hallway for judges that ruled against Trump (for treason, natch). Leadership made him knock that off around September because they were getting excessive and the ones on stands were interfering with hall traffic.
I am sure his neighbors will be happy he is leaving.
The main problem with the nuclear family is the toxic radioactive waste.