Anti-Feminist Ladies Have Tips For Living Your Worst Life, Also Cervical Cancer
They're miserable and boring and can't wait for you to join them!
It has been a while since we last checked in on our old pal Lori Alexander — but she’s been on a real tear lately in terms of posting her Ls, and is also offering some rather questionable medical advice!
Most people, in general, want to be happy. They want to enjoy their lives. If they marry, they want to marry someone they love. Despite the fact that “May you live in interesting times” is supposed to be a curse, most people want their lives to at least be somewhat interesting.
But not Lori! In a series of recent videos and posting, Lori has been bragging about her miserable life, in hopes that we may all have something to aspire to.
Over on her blog this week, Lori brags on her “boring life.” Why is her life boring? Because she hasn’t had had sex with anyone but her husband and therefore hasn’t had any STIs.
My life is boring. I was raised in a Christian home. We attended church my entire childhood. I attended a Christian college. I married a Christian man. Neither of us had sex with anyone else. We had four children. We attended church faithfully. We did all we could to raise them in the nurture and the admonition of the Lord. The blessings of a boring life.
As I grow older, I see how great a boring life actually is. I’ve never had to worry about STDs. Did you know that you will not get cervical cancer if you marry someone who has never had sex with anyone else so you don’t need pap smears? My gynecologist recently told me this.
Yeah … that’s not actually true. It’s far more rare to get cervical cancer without HPV, but it does happen in about 8-10 percent of cases. Additionally, your Christian husband could have cheated on you and brought something home … and if it’s HPV you’d never know unless you got tested. (Although pap smears may soon be replaced by at-home swabbing)
Teach your children so they will know that sex is beautiful within marriage but terribly dangerous outside of marriage. If you don’t, culture will teach them that it’s a boring life to wait for marriage. Fornicating is the way to go. They will be taught the opposite of Truth. Combat culture’s lies constantly to your children. It will bless them. Far too many parents teach their children NOTHING about the consequences of fornication and disobeying God.
I am completely bonded to my husband as he is to me. Sexual purity even protects you within marriage. All of God’s ways are for our good. His blessings are abundant! Don’t ever let anyone ever convince you that a boring life is bad.
What’s really effective, I’ve heard, is to scream “I CAN SEE YOUR DIRTY PILLOWS! EVERYONE WILL!” at your child and then lock them in a closet. Just so long as they don’t have any telekinetic powers, because that can get in the way of the totally normal lesson you are helping them learn.
Now, if you’re wondering what kind of wonders a boring life can lead to, you are in luck! Because Lori also just did a whole video on how the first twenty or so years of her marriage were completely miserable.
So, Lori starts out by talking about her childhood, about how she would go to movies with her mother and sister and they would cry and she would feel nothing. She then talks about meeting her husband Ken in college — how she wasn’t physically attracted to him, how she didn’t get butterflies, how they didn’t get along, but she still just kind of thought he’d be a good husband, so when he proposed to her, in his house, without any pomp and circumstance beyond “Do you want to be Mrs. Alexander?” she agreed. And then she wasn’t excited to marry him, either.
“I felt like he stole my joy,” is the specific phrase she used.
Lori Alexander wondered, she notes, at various points if there was something wrong with her. I’m going to say yes. Also that I think she might be a sociopath.
Now, apparently their marriage was miserable for over 20 years before she decided to stop nagging Ken and become … The Transformed Wife.
The lesson, here, she says is that love isn’t an emotion and you shouldn’t marry someone based on how you feel about them, which sounds unpleasant and exactly like the kind of thing that would lead to 20 years of misery.
Curiously, Lori Alexander is not the only weird anti-feminist influencer talking about how super great it is to be miserable. Ben Shapiro’s sister has dropped her “Classically Abby” YouTube show and moved onto Substack, where she will now be chronicling her journey as a “First Generation Stay-At-Home Mom.”
You will of course be delighted to know that literally everyone besides Abby Shapiro Roth is doing stay-at-home momming wrong. Tradwives? Doing it wrong by making it look too glamorous and never showing the reality of being a stay-at-home mom.
Those who simply choose to stay at home because it’s what they want to do? Also doing it wrong. Because unless it is part of their values and they truly believe that “their place” is in the home, it’s all for naught because they could just, like, decide to go back to work at some point!
If you don’t believe that the best place you can be is home and the job of serving your family is paramount, that lifestyle choice that looks too good to be true on Insta will turn out to be just that. When the beautiful dresses are dirty and the dinner isn’t on the table and the children aren’t playing independently when you need a break, you will think you deserve to find your happiness somewhere different. Somewhere better. And so you’ll make compromises to hang on to your “lifestyle choice” - you’ll have fewer children to minimize the strain and the chaos; you’ll outsource your children to daycare when it gets too hard; you’ll start working so you can enjoy your me-time.
OH HEAVENS! The shame of it all! Can you imagine? Mothers choosing to stay home when their kids are very young and then going back to work? Or not having more kids than they feel they can handle?
Perhaps the strangest part of all of it, however, was a comment on the post from a woman who just absolutely loved Classically Abby’s article … but also wanted to let her know that living that life nearly drove her to suicide.
As we’ve reported here before, this tradwife stuff really does not appear to end well for many of those who choose it — particularly for those who really are financially dependent on their spouse. Even more particularly for those who are dependent on the kind of spouse that wants a “tradwife” in the year 2024.
Now, Abby Shapiro Roth is lucky. Her family has money. She, we assume, also makes her own money doing this nonsense. If her husband leaves her, she’s not going to be out on the streets or living in her car. Other people are not so fortunate.
Lori, too, is lucky in her own way. She doesn’t have emotions and she has no desire to feel them (perhaps this is what makes it possible for her to be so very chill about the concept of marital rape). It’s probably a lot easier to spend your life with a man you are not attracted to and don’t get along with all that well
I don’t get it, personally. I am far from the kind of person who thinks you need to be happy all the time (I have accepted that while I am not remotely goth, people feel that I have “goth energy” and there’s not much I can do about that besides get a tan and … take up pickleball?), but I don’t get the leap from that to “Do things the way I do them, even if that makes you miserable, because that’s what God wants!”
Is it that lonely in a hair shirt?
PREVIOUSLY ON WONKETTE!
please don't take up pickleball. i was tired of hearing about it the first time i heard about it.
Aren't these tradwives little more than sex objects?
Everything about their identity is tied up in taking the P from the right P-possessor.