A rare peek inside the Sekrit ChatCave People sometimes wonder how Yr Wonkette stays on top of the news so good. They ask us all the time, "Hey! Wonkette! How do you stay on top of the news so good?" There's no real secret to it: Yr Wonkette reads
The N2O shortage was made apparent to me almost a month ago, though I was unaware of the explosive cause. On Thanksgiving Day, just prior to my pilgrimage across town for the traditional family drama, my sibling calls me, explaining that there had been an oversight in planning, and there was no whipped cream for the pumpkin pie! Could I please be a dear, and pick some up on my way over?
So of course, Mrs. Smibo and I thought it would be a friendly gesture to stop at the grocery store on the way, but when we got there, there was a big chain across the door, and a sign saying "closed on Thanksgiving. Now, we had never heard of a grocery store that was closed on Thanksgiving before, so with tears in our eyes we drove off into the sunset looking for another place to get some whipped cream. We didn't find one.
Til we came to a main road, and off the side of the main road was a 15-foot cliff fucking Mal-Wart store, which was of course open late in the afternoon on Thanksgiving day. They were out of every sort of whipped topping imaginable though, except for eight cans of generic aerosol unsweetened real cream. Of those eight cans, six had their cap seals broken, and the seventh was of questionable integrity, as if someone had gone to a great and conscientious effort to make it appear that they had not, in fact, huffed all the nitrous oxide out of it while they were standing there in the dairy aisle.
The eighth can appeared intact, so we bought it. The end.
As you know, I stand up for science. I also stand up for Political Wire. I love them only a tad less than I love this here mommy-recipe-blog. I also too give them a scant portion of my piddly monthly Ameros budget because Taegan Goddard is a rockstar of journamalism. He probably even wears a green visor, although I hope there is no cigarette hanging out of the corner of his mouth. Do I give moniez to the New York Times or the Washington Post? No I do not. Why? Because I think of them as the Ivy League of media and I am a state university-type person who has no trust fund in her future, let alone her present. I might, however, have a job as a Walmart greeter in the coming years if people like Taegan Goddard and our Esteemed Editrix are put out of bidness. Throw Political Wire a bone if you have one, people. You won't be sorry.
But... they have tubbed whipped cream? It exists and is sweet and doesn't require nitrous, and they're light enough to throw at someone's head and not seriously hurt them, which is what usually happens at Thanksgiving...
The N2O shortage was made apparent to me almost a month ago, though I was unaware of the explosive cause. On Thanksgiving Day, just prior to my pilgrimage across town for the traditional family drama, my sibling calls me, explaining that there had been an oversight in planning, and there was no whipped cream for the pumpkin pie! Could I please be a dear, and pick some up on my way over?
So of course, Mrs. Smibo and I thought it would be a friendly gesture to stop at the grocery store on the way, but when we got there, there was a big chain across the door, and a sign saying "closed on Thanksgiving. Now, we had never heard of a grocery store that was closed on Thanksgiving before, so with tears in our eyes we drove off into the sunset looking for another place to get some whipped cream. We didn't find one.
Til we came to a main road, and off the side of the main road was a 15-foot cliff fucking Mal-Wart store, which was of course open late in the afternoon on Thanksgiving day. They were out of every sort of whipped topping imaginable though, except for eight cans of generic aerosol unsweetened real cream. Of those eight cans, six had their cap seals broken, and the seventh was of questionable integrity, as if someone had gone to a great and conscientious effort to make it appear that they had not, in fact, huffed all the nitrous oxide out of it while they were standing there in the dairy aisle.
The eighth can appeared intact, so we bought it. The end.
As you know, I stand up for science. I also stand up for Political Wire. I love them only a tad less than I love this here mommy-recipe-blog. I also too give them a scant portion of my piddly monthly Ameros budget because Taegan Goddard is a rockstar of journamalism. He probably even wears a green visor, although I hope there is no cigarette hanging out of the corner of his mouth. Do I give moniez to the New York Times or the Washington Post? No I do not. Why? Because I think of them as the Ivy League of media and I am a state university-type person who has no trust fund in her future, let alone her present. I might, however, have a job as a Walmart greeter in the coming years if people like Taegan Goddard and our Esteemed Editrix are put out of bidness. Throw Political Wire a bone if you have one, people. You won't be sorry.
With dogs and babbies.
Makes him a pushover.
Does this affect the supply of spray cheese also too?https://uploads.disquscdn.c...
I still giggle when he priceguns the puppies! But that is from "Airplane! ".
Oh you mean Cool whhip?
https://m.youtube.com/watch...
As long he stays well away from our dear Wonkette....
Political Wire is THE BEST! Ummm, I mean the second best, directly after Wonkette. ;-)
This is no laughing matter!
Buy heavy cream, whip it, and add sugar to taste. Whipped cream problem solved but you still can't do whip its.
But... they have tubbed whipped cream? It exists and is sweet and doesn't require nitrous, and they're light enough to throw at someone's head and not seriously hurt them, which is what usually happens at Thanksgiving...
... assimilated... exsanguinated... one of those two things.
... how else does one describe what ever the hell Romney was doing... "Reek. My name is Reek."
Um... no. Have you ever seen a broad-shouldered woman in shoulder pads? Shoulder pads are a mistake.
The Wonkette Newsroom, in my imagination.
I remember it like it was yesterday . . .
https://www.youtube.com/wat...