Bari Weiss Should Do CBS Town Hall On Whose Fault It Is She Sucks So Bad
Our general view here is that we do our viewers the best service by presenting them with the full context they need to assess the story of why Bari Weiss sucks so bad.
When Bari Weiss decided that she couldn’t possibly run a 60 Minutes segment on the horrific CECOT rape and torture prison in El Salvador where Donald Trump and his top Nazis sent hundreds of Venezuelans with no criminal records, she told staffers in a memo that “[her] general view is that we do our viewers the best service by presenting them with the full context they need to assess the story. In other words, I believe we need to do more reporting here.” Typical wankery we expect from her.
The piece just wasn’t ready, we guess, unless Stephen Miller was allowed to give his side of the story, or maybe eat Kristi Noem’s latest puppy victim on live TV.
After the humiliation started to spread, Weiss went off on CBS staffers, saying that in any newsroom she runs (as if this wasn’t her first), she finds it “absolutely unacceptable” not to “assume the best intentions of our colleagues” AKA herself, Bari Weiss, Known Hack And Eager Fascist Bootlicker.
The good news is that we all saw that 60 Minutes piece anyway, because Bari Weiss is a fucking moron who’s out of her league trying to do TV news, who didn’t understand that the piece was signed, sealed and delivered, in particular to Canadian affiliates, who went ahead and pressed play on the fucking thing.
Better luck next time standing athwart journalism and yelling “But what does ERIKA KIRK think about thiiiiiiiiiis!”
More good news? The New York Times is doing its readers the best service, by presenting them with the full context they need to assess the story of why Bari Weiss sucks so bad and who she’s blaming for that (spoiler not her).
Let’s laugh at it and call Bari Weiss garbage while she’s having a bad day!
The Times piece purports to be one of those “inside the news” thingies, “inside Bari Weiss’s bumpy revamp,” yadda yadda. Like it’s just bumping along, even if it’s a rough ride at some point. Maybe they should have asked Stephen Miller for his comments on Bari Weiss, or if he’d like to come down to the Times newsroom and eat a cat.
But it’s great for great quotes.
“We need to *be the news*” saith Bari Weiss about the CBS Evening News starring Katy Tur’s houseboy we mean husband Tony Dokoupil. You might think Weiss is off to a good start here, understanding that “news” is her job now. But no, as NYT bitchily explains: “Ms. Weiss has achieved that goal — perhaps not in the way she hoped.”
Hahaha, it means there are lots of headlines where everybody is laughing at Bari Weiss’s obvious and early failures. And she is MAD ABOUT THAT.
They made fun of her shit network on the Golden Globes, which were on her shit network, and Mister Airhead Boner on the Evening News had a bad first night with teleprompter, because Bari Weiss wouldn’t stop rewriting it at the last minute, etc., and so forth, but you know whose fault all this is? Rhymes with SNOT CHERRY!
Privately, Ms. Weiss has been deeply frustrated by the negative reaction to her decisions, and has blamed some subordinates for not stanching the criticism, three people familiar with internal discussions said.
What did she want the subordinates to do to stop the criticism? Go out and make people stop laughing at her?
Anyway, please note that it bothers Bari Weiss when people publicly make fun of her bad decisions and utter lack of journalistic acumen, like the internet is always doing, and like Nikki Glaser did at the Golden Globes.
So keep it up! It’s working!
Here is the part about Bari Weiss’s wife Nellie Bowles, who sucks too:
Ms. Weiss’s wife, Nellie Bowles, a former reporter at The Times, openly mocked the objections of the “60 Minutes” staff who had clashed with her spouse in a column published by The Free Press, which Ms. Weiss continues to oversee.
“My lovely wife asked some 60 Minutes producers to report out a story a little more, literally Hey guys make a couple more phone calls and then we’ll run the piece in a week or two,” Ms. Bowles wrote. “No! the media collectively shrieked. We shan’t!” (CBS News declined to make Ms. Weiss available for an interview. Referring to Ms. Bowles’s column, Ms. Weiss said in a statement that The Free Press was “completely editorially independent,” and added, “Also: My wife is the funniest writer in America.”)
Oh wow she is a regular Don Rickles, just a regular Milton Berle, just a regular Gallagher.
“We shan’t!” Stop, Bari Weiss’s wife, you are far too understanding of what makes laughing for us!
Every famous comedian and denizen of funny town has a zinger punchline they’re known for, or at least comedians in 1948 did.
“Cut. It. Out!” said Uncle Jesse on Full House.
“Did I do that?” asked Urkel.
“Bazinga!” says Sheldon.
“How YOU doin’?” asked Joey Tribbiani.
[loud toilet grunts] said Tim Allen every night on his show about power drills and how conservative white men are stupid.
“Git ‘r done!” says Larry the Cable Guy.
“Why I oughtaaaaaa” and “Nyuk nyuk nyuk!” said the Three Stooges.
And “WE SHAN’T!” says Bari Weiss’s wife, the joke understander.
The point is that Bari Weiss is bad at this, and it’s your fault, and not Bari Weiss’s fault, it is absolutely unacceptable to say it is her fault, and it is certainly not her wife Nellie’s fault, Nellie’s just here to keep the crowd loose.
Fail harder, Bari Weiss! We’re sure that Pulitzer is right around the corner.
OPEN THREAD.
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Cakes Jr was telling me about her day at college earlier this evening, apparently it was an assessment day. Ordinarily, Cakes Jr is not a fan of assessments, exams, etc. Today was an exception.
She, and her classmates were being assessed on their ability to prepare and cook a specific recipe - a tortellini with a pesto, cream and white wine sauce. And they had to make their own pasta.
Cakes Jr was the only student in her class who has previously made pasta, and has fone so multiple times. She tells me she was honoured with a fist bump and a fair bit of praise from her tutor for this. She also spent a fair amount of the alloted time helping her classmates learn how to work the pasta machine.
I get the feeling her tutor is pretty impressed that Cakes Jr has a family who take cooking pretty seriously. It's certainly helped her stand out among her classmates, and the praise is helping her confidence.
She's also going on a trip to London later this year. A trip with will involve spending time in the kitchens of some of the best hotels and restaurants in the capital. She's pretty excited about it.
Never good when several cop cars and a ambulance pull up in front of your building