Blowing Bubbas: Bill And Hillary Clinton To Testify, And Other Epstein Updates!
Featuring Bari Weiss’s CBS crackpot 'health' hire, and more Russia, Russia, Russia
Sooeeee, those 3.5 million Epstein files sure are something, a fatberg the equivalent of more than one turd from every resident of Chicago. Three latest, biggest updates, or we’ll be here all day!
YESTERDAY!
Bill and Hillary cave on a closed-door deposition, sigh
To avoid possible contempt hearings, Bill and Hillary Clinton have agreed to “appear for depositions on mutually agreeable dates,” with their lawyers proposing a voluntary, transcribed interview in New York City, limited to four hours and confined to matters “related to the investigations and prosecutions of Jeffrey Epstein.”
But that is not enough for Kentucky-fried chucklefuck Rep. James Comer, chair of the House Committee on Oversight and Government Reform! He’s demanding “transcribed, filmed depositions this month with no time limit.”
Fuck both those things, put them both on live television! Bill and Hills Live and One Day Only would be must-see TV! We have seen Bill in public so rarely. He was last spotted in New York three months ago with a giant bandage on his nose, and in 2024 he gave a speech at the DNC, but that’s about it. How we would adore those two getting up there and shutting those braying heehaws down.
Comer surely wants them behind closed doors so he can selectively edit the tape to make it look like the Clintons saying they just got back from barbecuing babies in their Chappaqua adrenochrome lab. And it would be a distraction too, away from where the focus ought to be: on justice for the survivors the DOJ won’t talk to, and the perpetrators the DOJ won’t pursue.
Still, how delicious would it be! As former president and former secretary of State, respectively, Bill and Hillary are in an excellent position to know some stuff about what US security services knew about Epstein. And now former presidents have been blessed with the power of declassifying and second-hand declassifying things with their minds!
Maybe we could learn exactly what it was Bill Clinton found out in 2003 that made him drop Jeffrey Epstein like a hot potato and quit answering his calls. Was Bill tipped off by intelligence, or did he simply personally get creeped out by Epstein bringing around middle-school girls who kept trying to give him backrubs? Regardless, there is no dispute, Bill Clinton cut ties with Epstein years before Donald John Trump did, and sure as shit wasn’t his closest friend for 15 years.
What might Hillary have learned about Epstein and friends during her tenure as secretary of State from 2009-’13? What does she know about Epstein’s friendships with people in Trump’s inner circle, like Steve Bannon and Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick? Surely in 2015 if Hillary didn’t know about Lutnick’s friendship before she planned a fundraiser at his house next door to Epstein’s, the ensuing QAnon outrage clued her in.
Russia, Russia, Russia!
The British press has been way more on top of the files than the American press, presumably more occupied by stomping out a thousand other flaming bags of dog doo at the same time, while still trying to maintain whatever crumbs of access to his Holy Office that Dear Leader will allow them.
But the Daily Mail goes there with an entire rundown of Epstein’s closeness to Putin, “Epstein’s sex empire was ‘KGB honeytrap’: Paedophile financier had multiple talks with Putin after conviction - with Russian girls flown in to harvest ‘kompromat’ on world-famous figures.” You must appreciate how they summarize stories in their titles so thoroughly!
The Mail is aggrieved in particular that “while US security services ‘monitored’ Epstein’s Russian connections for years, their UK equivalents were hesitant due to Epstein’s connection to Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor.” As well they should be! Only God and the ghost of the Queen know what kind of information or favors spies and foreign governments pumped out of randy, leaky Andy.
The Mail also notes that Ghislaine Maxwell potentially had her own foreign intelligence ties through her father Robert, who also happened to die under “murky circumstances”:
Security sources say Robert Maxwell was a Russian asset from the 1970s, when he worked to extradite Soviet Jews to Israel, with the involvement of Israeli intelligence service Mossad.
In return, they say, Maxwell laundered Russian money into the West - with the help of Epstein.
They think the financier was introduced to Maxwell and the KGB by an oil tycoon also in the pay of Russian intelligence. Probes into Robert Maxwell’s business dealings have uncovered links not only to the KGB and Mossad - but also MI6.
US security officials also believe Epstein had long-standing ties with Russian organised crime, who could have been blackmailing him. That could explain the ease with which Epstein appeared to be able to fly in ‘girls’ from Russia.
Russia blackmailing people with child prostitutes? It’s like the whole Steele Dossier story coming back full circle!
Speaking of full circle, Todd Blanche has come around to a little pedo cabal partying is fine. “It’s not a crime to party with Mr. Epstein. It’s not a crime to email Mr. Epstein.” Sounds like the GOP has found its bumper sticker for midterms!
Hairy with Bari
CBS News’s top tone policer Bari Weiss is still refusing to fire Dr. Peter Attia, a longevity-wellness grifter and podcaster she’d hired last month to be a health contributor.
And Weiss’s wife Nellie Bowles is in the files too, making Epstein’s acquaintance though someone named “Masha” (maybe Masha Drovka?) in 2018 while working as a reporter for the New York Times, following the beat of tech, bad-faith criticism of the Left, and sperm. Bowles’ sizzling scooptakes included “The Sperm Kings Have a Problem: Too Much Demand” and “Abolish the Police? Those Who Survived the Chaos in Seattle Aren’t So Sure,” and plenty of Silicon Valley/techbro tongue baths.
As for Attia, his name appears in more than 1,700 documents, some including some disgusting direct correspondence in the mid-2010s, as in long after Epstein’s Florida conviction.
What a loser: In one email in 2016, titled “confirmed,” he wrote to Epstein: “Pussy is, indeed, low carb. Still awaiting results on gluten content, though.” Ladies, if your pussy has gluten, your yeast infection is so out of control it has started its own bakery.
A couple of days earlier, Attia had also pitched his pricy personal longevity-themed medical consulting services to Epstein, asking, “Have you decided if you’re interested in living longer (solely for the ladies, of course)?”
And in June 2015, Attia emailed Epstein with the subject line “got a fresh shipment,” Epstein replied, “me too,” with a photo that is redacted in the released document. Attia responded, “Please tell you found that picture on line…bastard,” to which Mr. Epstein said, “fraid not.”
Attia responded, “the biggest problem with becoming friends with you? The life you lead is so outrageous, and yet I can’t tell a soul…”
In other places, Attia pathetically whinges to Epstein in a strange use of the third person that he goes “into JE withdrawal when I don’t see him” and suggests that he, Attia, wants to visit the island.
Attia’s defense to the New York Times was that the shipment was the medication metformin, a diabetes treatment. That’s surely what he meant about the secret, outrageous life Epstein was living, Epstein’s secretly treated high blood sugar! Attia also claims Epstein’s photo was “of an adult woman,” and that he never actually visited sex island.
“Reading that exchange now is very embarrassing, and I will not defend it,” Attia told the Times, while continuing to try to defend it some more as bad judgment from a young, naive man in his 40s.
Poor Jeffrey Epstein, sounds like all of the men in his emails trying to find time to visit the island — Attia, Elon Musk, Howard Lutnick — ended up rudely standing him up, and any who showed up just happened to miss the sex parties and only arrived just in time for family picnic day instead!
Yeah, there’s no defense of it. But nice try, TODD.
Last word to a disgusted survivor!
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These dumb assholes talk like virgin 14 year old boys
“Pussy is, indeed, low carb. Still awaiting results on gluten content, though.”
Said by someone who would only have their first not entirely consensual sexual encounter with a passed out theta when they were 20.
Do they think this is a “gotcha” thing? Like they are going to “own the libs” if the Clintons are implicated in this mess?
Put them in the same North Atlantic bound rowboat as everyone else in the files and throw them overboard if they so much as KNEW and did nothing, much less participated in the cabal of child rapists and blackmailers and money launderers.
Can I get an amen?
I knew I could.
Republicans really don’t understand moral convictions AT. ALL.