385 Comments
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Martini Glambassador's avatar

Clearly, the Wonkette kitty did not the get memo that cats don't like water. She's all about that underwater exploration and the treasures found therein. Find out more about snorkeling and it's history here: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/snorkel-kitty

Otis Fuentes's avatar

"its"

"it's" is only used as the contraction of "it is."

But typographical pedantry notwithstanding, superb animation today!

RefillingThorsBeer's avatar

See, I disagree with the pedants... what is the possessive of "it"?

If it possesses a thing, is it not it's thing?

BlueSpot's avatar

It is its thing.

Yes, English can be confusing.

You can help your Uncle Jack off a horse, or you can help your uncle jack off a horse.

We try hard to follow rules of English to avoid such confusion. We are not always successful.

RefillingThorsBeer's avatar

o.k. that is just a brilliant response.

Now I am going to go eat some shoots and leaves while I contemplate the mysteries of Engrish.

BlueSpot's avatar

Or be the panda that eats, shoots, and leaves.

RefillingThorsBeer's avatar

I mean, keeping up with the Joneses is one thing, but if you are keeping up with the Jones's Ferrari, you gotta MASH that gas.....

BlueSpot's avatar

I agree that it should be "Jones's Ferrari", but common usage and style now has it as "Jones' Ferrari." A great deal depends on which style book you use or were raised on.

Martini Glambassador's avatar

I actually did know that! Sometimes my spell-check takes over and, shrug emoji. I do compose these little pinned comment blurbs on the fly so I admit they are not as well-edited as they otherwise might be.

Thanks for the compliments!

Otis Fuentes's avatar

Most deserved!

And I hate that, my phone routinely corrects we'll too well. Bad enough being an OCD copyediting fool but when the entire weight of the digital world is stacked against one? Fehgeddabouid!

Mr Canoehead/M Tête-Canoë's avatar

Look out for Rapture Of The Deep! (And carnivorous mermaids.)

Martini Glambassador's avatar

Not to spoil a surprise, but I think you are going to like another one of the Tab gifs this week. Stay tuned... ;)

Antifa Commander's avatar

Who else tried dragging the kitty to the tabs?

Barnaby_Drudge's avatar

Allow me to introduce Nathan & Winnie the Beach Cats. They live down under so perhaps things are different there.

https://www.instagram.com/nathan_thebeachcat/?theme=dark

Carstonio's avatar

From my reading, cats do like water, they just insist on exploring it on their terms, not ours.

Jen's Taking Greenland's avatar

The can had me Snickering

Oblio's Cap's avatar

I liked the Jelly fish.

Martini Glambassador's avatar

As I was finishing up the animation on this, I told my husband that I know how to go for cheap laughs ;-)

Mr Canoehead/M Tête-Canoë's avatar

A cheap laugh is still a laugh

BlueSpot's avatar

A good laugh is always worth the investment.

John the Retired Mailman's avatar

...which we are MORE than willing to provide.

John the Retired Mailman's avatar

Looks like the makings of a fun child's video game!

Stroke1's avatar

Speaking of the kittehz, I just read this and it's quite interesting. And what you all suspected is likely true: THEY CAN SEE A THING THAT ISN'T THERE!

''What Cats’ Love of Boxes and Squares Can Tell Us About Their Visual Perception''

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/what-cats-love-of-boxes-and-squares-can-tell-us-about-their-visual-perception?utm_source=pocket-newtab

SkeptiKC's avatar

Having watched Cat the Ripper focus intently upon that which I can't actually see ANY sign of on a number of occasions I'd already determined that to be the absolute truth.

Felines have a "unique" perspective on this world.

Bobathonic, Dingus Crusher's avatar

"Later, Jacques Catsteau would invent the SCUBA."

You Should Ice That Burn's avatar

We had a big floofy Tuxedo cat that would put his whole head underwater to look at the goldfish in our patio pond, we named him Cousteau.

The Wanderer's avatar

On the next episode of 'The Underworld Water of Jacques Catsteau,' our intrepid diver will search for the elusive Forward-Walking Crab.

Blanche de Shambles's avatar

"By this time, my lungs were aching for air."

Granny's Delusions of Grandeur's avatar

At least she showed enough sense to swim right past those canned clams.

V4Virginia's avatar

Those were a nice touch :)

Granny's Delusions of Grandeur's avatar

OMG I still haven't shipped your package!

V4Virginia's avatar

LOL don't worry about it, I had forgotten all about it :)

Granny's Delusions of Grandeur's avatar

I'll get it out together this evening and shipped tomorrow. Probably.

Diane's Less Hostile Username's avatar

We need a real cute sea lion gif.

Thatsit Fortheotherwon's avatar

Was that the guy who would argue with anybody/everybody about every subject?

fakeconsultant's avatar

Can we connect crypto, a lack of Bitcoin profits and random betting on hamster races?

Yes we can.

https://www.coindesk.com/markets/2023/07/21/move-over-shiba-inu-crypto-community-flirts-with-hamster-race-betting/

#TheStupidIsStrongInThisOne

ziggywiggy's avatar

I respectfully request people stop sharing their comments to Notes unless you really want to duplicate your comment. Part of the problem is it also repeats the story. I think many just don't realize that's what the "Share to Notes" does. So you see the same Wonkette story reposted over and over. It is filling up the Notes with stuff that's already here. So it makes that section hard to use for anything else but a duplicate comment section. It would be nice if Notes could be different than something we already have. Thanks, just trying to make this work for all of us.

Jamoche's avatar

"Margarine’s district basically still exists because of the New Deal and the Great Society."

For a second I thought this would be about the history of margarine as a butter replacement during the Depression, which is an interesting story and the sort of thing that ends up as a tab :)

Erin's avatar

My favorite margarine fact is that the Dairy Board got the FDA to require margarine not be colored to look like butter when it was first released, so the makers included a dye packet in the tub for you to mix in yourself.

Randy Bender's avatar

I can't believe Sanchez called for a snap election IN AUGUST when it's too hot to think and the entire country is on vacation. That in itself would've royally pissed people off.

Randy Bender's avatar

Please let Barbie: Set It Off be the spark that causes women finally to nuke the system of toxic patriarchy in America.

mvario's avatar

Ken Paxton’s far-right billionaire backers are fighting hard to save him | The Texas Tribune https://www.texastribune.org/2023/07/24/ken-paxton-impeachment-dunn-wilks/

mvario's avatar

Big Pharma Frantically Trying To Stop Medicare Price Negotiations | Crooks and Liars https://crooksandliars.com/2023/07/big-pharma-frantically-trying-stop

OneYieldRegular's avatar

>We’re still doing memoirs from people who haven’t done anything huh?<

A friend's niece wrote her "memoir" when she was 20 and self-published it. As I'd known her since she was a baby, I didn't have the heart or inclination to read it, but I understood that it was all about clearing her head of difficult family stuff, which had been excessive.

Anyway, it seems to have worked, as she has developed into a marvelous person who teaches inner city kids, is married to a lovely woman, and they have just had the most beautiful baby I've ever seen in my life.

Sister Artemis's avatar

I understand the writing-it-out part, but I don't get the need to publish an autobiography so early in life, unless you've been asked to detail a relatively unique experience others might benefit from hearing.

OneYieldRegular's avatar

None of us understood it either, and I think the general silence around it made it sink beneath the sea.

Zap's avatar

OK I'm all in. Deleted my Disqus account.

Sister Artemis's avatar

I'm curious - why delete the account?

I didn't delete mine because there are a couple of other sites I occasionally visit that also use Disqus for their commenting system. But (again, curious) are you worried about leaving an internet trail? or is it something else, and I haven't thought of it yet.

Zap's avatar

I don't use any sites that have Disqus so I don't really need it .

Sister Artemis's avatar

I wish we could down load our Disqus history, including replies to our own non-comments :(

Satanic Pancake's avatar

There are people who pay good money to get slapped by confusingly attractive people.

defpac's avatar

I know, it is Palmer, but still a very nice cute summary of where Trump is right now.

https://www.palmerreport.com/news/sucks-to-be-donald-trump-right-now/51294/

ziggywiggy's avatar

Palmer blocked me on twitter because I reported him for saying something really wrong and he had to take his tweet down, he figured out it was me because there was little interaction with Wonkette writers that set the whole thing off. I used to like reading him but he just talked a lot of bullshit and it got annoying.

defpac's avatar

I agree. He is as flawed as any of us. I appreciate his analysis 90% of the time, but I absolutely dislike how he keeps claiming that he MUST be 100% correct.

From my gut feeling statistics, his predictions are more often correct compared to the competition, but I totally agree: he comes over arrogant and extremely "sensitive" when it is about Big Mr. Palmer himself making mistakes. Nonetheless, he was like the only source I remember who attacked the "big red wave coming" last year before it even started, and he kept pushing people constantly to "invest" in the tight races, those that in the end made a difference. He got that one really close to 100% correct.

But I hear you, I avoid asking him pesky questions (as I value his twitter threads to be "all I need", most of his articles are just click bait summaries of previous threads).

Mr Canoehead/M Tête-Canoë's avatar

"Slavery and the wonderful white people who ended it". If only all those Black people hadn't enslaved themselves we wouldn't have had this problem.

Secret Agent Super Dragon's avatar

How are the actors in Barbie "confusingly" attractive? They seem pretty straightforwardly attractive to me but maybe I'm a weirdo.

ExecutorElassus's avatar

It's because a whole bunch of conservative pundits are self-loathing pillow-biters.

Shocktreatment's avatar

On Tuesday, Johnson & Johnson is the fourth company to sue the Biden administration to stop the drug pricing program. They join Merck, Bristol Myers Squibb and Astellas Pharma

*Johnson & Johnson net income for the twelve months ending June 30, 2023 was $13.054B

*Merck net income for the twelve months ending March 31, 2023 was $13.030B

*Bristol Myers Squibb netted $6.3 billion in 2022

*Astellas Pharma annual net income for 2022 was $1.017B

The entire industry operates on the sufferance of US citizens and the will of legislators. One of their first observations was "The will of the people doesn't matter if we own enough of Congress" and here we are

Lady Tavestock's avatar

Salon had an article about caretaking in an aging population. A ton of RWNJ made comments that the liberals who wrote the article are driving scare tactics about the need for more government assistance but the real problem is that the younger generation is so self-absorbed what with protecting the environment and pushing woke philosophies that no one cares about angry old people. I think I broke my fucking brain. https://www.salon.com/2023/07/23/live-long-and-flounder-an-aging-expert-on-the-looming-of-our-longer-lifespans/

Vermicious Kid, RN's avatar

The way these people act, it should be much better paying work to take care of them. Unfortunately being a CNA pays barely above minimum wage.

Lady Tavestock's avatar

Totally agree. The point of the article was to point out that ageism is a huge part of the problem and the way "these people" lack any self-awareness suggests they don't even understand why their children ignore them.