Brutal Things Horror Movies Did For Genuine Reactions! Tabs, Wed., Jan. 17, 2024
I don't like it. Morning news roundup!
Trump, the 14th Amendment, and the Snot Boogie Theory. “This America, man.” (Balls and Strikes)
Very polite media too polite to mention it (ever) when a congressman calls for martial law or Bernie Kerik does three years in prison for a crime for which Trump later pardons him. Isn’t that polite of them? — Stop the Presses
In case you missed it because you thought you could just skip an Evan post about Dean Phillips (LOL), the time Joe Biden told Bill Ackman to shut his fucking mouth. :) — Fox Business
Our Liz previewed today’s E. Jean Carroll v. Trump redux. Prepare for a shocking: “Also in the meantime, Trump’s lawyers acted like assholes.” (Law and Chaos)
Texas lawyers would like the state to clarify when in a woman’s failing pregnancy or medical emergency an abortion is permitted. The state can’t do that, Dave. — Texas Tribune
Vox says the new Child Tax Credit compromise isn’t nearly what it could be (which we knew!) but that it really is better than nothing. Read the extremely complicated splainer, here!
Our government should delight us! On Finnish baby boxes and being cared for. (White Pages)
Somehow we missed that women were having to carry dying babies to term in Ron DeSantis’s Florida last year, which a legislator explained meant they were “providing mothers with the resources they need to raise healthy children, empowering doctors to help their patients make informed decisions, and shifting the conversation to valuing life.” — CNN
Colorado bill would put some scratch in felons’ pockets when they’re released. California just started doing this too (Wonk link). It’s a good thing, which will do good and doubtless decrease recidivism. And one day a felon is going to do a crime anyway and the Right will Willie Horton the hell out of it. So what, we already know that, it’s baked in to everything. (Bolts mag)
This guy kept saying Canada was lighting all the forests on fire to prove the hoax of climate change. Instead he was lighting all the forests on fire to … disprove the hoax of climate change? Weirdly, he does not make sense! (Business Insider)
Insurance companies, supply chains, all that shit: Climate change fucks with the economy, idiots. — Bill McKibben
The AI “George Carlin” sounds like it is as sad and terrible as everybody who heard the phrase “AI ‘George Carlin’” assumed it would be :/ — Ed Zitron
Horror movies, I AIN’T CLICKING THAT! (Slash Film)
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I just want to throw Wonkette some money!
Your hed gif info, mes amis: https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/what-happens-in-morocco-stays-in?r=angu9&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcome=true
Did the guy who set the fires in Canada blame it on Jewish Space Lasers? Because that would be on-brand for a true conspiracy whack-a-loon.