Dementia Ward Nurse: Trump's Decaying Brain Was Only Joking To Reuters About Cancelling Elections
Is REUTERS helping hide from the public that Trump's brain is oatmeal? A Wonkvestigation!
On Wednesday, Reuters White House correspondent Steve Holland sat down in the Oval Office for a Dutch oven exclusive interview with President Donald J. Trump and Karoline Leavitt, the most enthusiastic candy striper in his dementia ward.
But Reuters did not publish a full transcript of that interview, and no audio or video clips of it! Only still photos, a debriefing with Holland, and a series of articles on the most alarming of Trump’s babblings by subject, including key quotes, Iran, Minnesota, Jerome Powell, Venezuelan opposition leader Maria Corina Machado pretending to re-gift Trump the Nobel Peace Prize, etc.
Surely not conditions that Reuters or any media outlet would prefer.
But President Ballroom is in a position to set whatever conditions he wants for press access to his aura, and Reuters will take any clicks they can get. And surely it would hurt the public too much to see with their own eyes the extent to which Trump’s brain is melting like a Jack-o-Lantern in a compost pile in January.
Many interview bits are wig-curling. Do not miss these.
Call off elections? Don’t mind if he does!
Someone has brought to Trump’s attention the matter of the midterms looking bleak as shit for Republicans, what with Trump’s own approval ratings underwater and sinking on literally everything, and congressional Republicans’ approval ratings even lower than that (29 percent, 70 percent disapproval, yowch!).
So the rusty, dusty hamster wheel in Trump’s mind is waddling its thoughts from A to B, arriving at … anyone who doesn’t love Trump is crazy, ergo they should not be allowed to vote!
“If you go by the past, only three presidents have won out of 65 years, or whatever the number is. What is that number? The crazy number almost doesn’t make sense, right? Even if they had a successful presidency, yeah, there’s almost like there’s a latch on it. [...] It’s some deep psychological thing, but when you win the presidency, you don’t win the midterms. [...] A lot of times, you can’t convince a voter [...] You have to just do what’s right. And then a lot of the things I did were not really politically popular. They turned out to be when it worked out so well. [...] When you think of it, we shouldn’t even have an election.”
We know how holy and sacred Trump thinks elections are, 34 felonies and one attempted coup later. But what is he literally intending to do and how far along are any actual concepts of plans to meddle in midterms? If he can’t seize and purge enough states’ voter rolls of Democrats and loses, will he seize voting machines at state elections offices anywhere the GOP loses a red seat? Or was that “simply joking,” “facetiously,” stop being so sensitive, brosephs? Inquiring minds want to know, but Holland either did not ask, or did not tell. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
And Trump said that a poll showing only four percent of Americans want to take over Greenland was “fake.”
The Independent’s White House correspondent Andrew Feinberg had a question yesterday about the whole no-elections thing, and Leavitt’s injected little mouth-pucker got so mad.
ANDREW, WERE YOU IN THE ROOM? NO, YOU WEREN’T.
And we all know why that was, girl. If Trump’s not roaming over to a window in the middle of a meeting to gaze out of it, he’s flipping a factory worker the middle eagle. His crazy is getting less cute all the time.
Trump refuses to say he feels bad about Good
Reuters’s James Oliphant also threw in some ass-kissy editorializing of Trump’s comments about the murder of Renee Good that context of a full, unedited clip or transcript of the interview could help with: “Trump appeared to express some sympathy for the death of Renee Nicole Good, after an ICE agent shot and killed her last week in Minneapolis, calling it ‘a very unfortunate incident.’” And Trump said it was “sad to see on both sides.”
My dude, that appears to express the exact opposite of sympathy for Good, it’s the same both sides bullshit refrain we’ve heard since the white supremacists marched their tiki torches in Charlottesville. Calling the incident unfortunate does not appear to express any sympathy for Good at all.
You better call Jerome
Will Trump heed the frettings from Scott Bessent and Republicans that locking up Jerome Powell for criminal renovating government buildings to be too fancy is a step too far that will incinerate the US’s money? Trump doesn’t care what any disloyal Republicans think. BUUTTT he’s not going to fire Powell this minute, BUUTTT it is too early to say, however, in the meantime he’s already mentally re-decorated Powell’s office. With a Kevin! Either former Fed Governor Kevin Warsh or National Economic Council Director Kevin Hassett.
Like marble armrests, sometimes you must swap the mise en place of a Kevin while also picturing the room in one’s mind. Man, woman, person, armrest, Kevin. “The two Kevins are very good,” Trump said. “You have some other good people too, but I’ll be announcing something over the next couple of weeks.”
Both sides now!
On Iran, Trump shook a Magic 8-Ball. Would he support the son of the deposed shah, Reza Pahlavi, ever leading there? Too soon to say. (How mean it would have been if Holland led with, “What can you tell me about Reza Pahlavi?” to see if Trump could figure out who he meant.) What are the next steps there? Who knows!
Venezuela: Former Maduro Vice President/current Trump-controlled Viceroy Delcy Rodriguez has been obeying just fine, “very good to deal with.” But opposition leader Maria Corina Machado has been so nice to him too! Ladies, it’s time to lip-synch for your lives.
On Ukraine: Zelenskyy is the only one holding up peace, but there will be peace any day! AKA the same Putin-pumper shit he has been saying all year.
Anyway, is REUTERS helping cover up for how OLD and SLEEPY and squirrelshit NUTS attic-racist-grandpa Donald John Trump is, or any deadly conditions that he is dying to death from like Hillary Clinton has been for the past decade?
We don’t know, because WERE WE IN THE ROOM? NO WE WEREN’T!
The end!
[Reuters Iran / Reuters archive link key quotes / Reuters archive link Jerome Powell / Reuters archive link ICE / Reuters archive link Ukraine / Mediaite]





I swear, I get more and more depressed about the state of journalism every day.
In this case, I think i can safely say that I most certainly DO NOT want to be in the room where (sh)it happens.