462 Comments

The real question is, will it be Eric or Joonyer honored by being buried alive in Trump’s casket, curled up at his feet, eternally begging for his love until the end of time.

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Don Joonyer has convinced me of a thing. That anyone can have a podcast show today.

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He does KNOW you can read the Bible for free, online, right? And that there are numerous organisations who'd be only too pleased to give you a physical copy, also for free? And that banks track the businesses you patronise, not the specific goods you bought from said businesses?

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No, no, and no. I’m mildly fascinated by this family’s obsession with the notion that the only christians that seem to matter are catholics. Is this the only one they know? Do they think all the various flavours of “protestant” aren’t christian?

I really wish someone would ask them if they’ve actually read it, and in which version. Ideally, in which languages, just for laughs.

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Simply asking them to identify different denominations would cause the record to skip. Catholic, Lutheran, Baptist, Methodists, Presbyterian, etc., etc., etc. They aren’t informed people, and they have no real values or beliefs except for dividing things and people into groups that either help them, or are enemies which must be destroyed. And always in the simplest terms.

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Sadly, you aren’t wrong. Still I’d love to ask what they think of the Church of England, the Anglican Church, and the Episcopalians. Again, just for laughs.

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They keep wearing out their bibles from angrily scratching out the woke parts, you know, all the words Jesus said about love thy neighbor and welcome the stranger, etc.

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Picking isolated passages from the Bible to justify the absolute worst human behaviors has been a tool for oppression and a favorite pastime for evil people for ages.

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founding

Boy howdy, them poor wingnuts are beset on all sides. They got Janet Reno, Eric Holder and Loretta Lynch sneaking up on them to take away their boomsticks (its only taking them so long cause they gotta do it slow and stealthy), the DOJ and the banks are taking names so's they can round up the bible believing Xtians, Rude Paul is leading all their chirren away from Jeee-zuss with his Homer seckshul addenda, their Golden Calf, their Twelth Imam Donald Rump got his election stolt right out from under him by busloads of invisible terrrists from across the wide open border with Mexico, so sneaky that they don't show up on film, PLUS mean, biass Democrat judges are out to get him with phoney charges. Was ever a good man so put upon? It is to weep.

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WTF? WTF, DJTJ?

(Moron.)

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founding

He gets like that when his brain bugs get stirred up.

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" the one Daddy doesn’t love back." Of Trump boys that doesn't narrow it down much if at all.

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Maybe stewards of the public good and organized crime are not compatable.

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Trump Junior should worry about losing the Catholic vote — his daddy’s Bible is the King James version. Catholics do not ascribe to or use that version of the Bible. So they’ve already screwed up their relationship with Catholic voters.

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Oh, like any of them knows that.

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My Dearest Esther,

I write this from far behind enemy lines, our squad prepared to move out in the morning. We are subsisting on jerky and hardtack alone because we daren't risk a fire. Our mood is grim in the dark, cold and restless and surrounded by danger.

With the sunrise, we set out to hide Easter eggs in the bushes outside the Unitarian Church. My hands, already shaking from the cold, shake even more from the anxiety of actually meeting one of these secular humanists face-to-face.

I miss your warm embrace every day and pray, every day, for an end to this horrendous War on Easter. I long for a moment of peace to romp with you in the grove of marital bliss. That alone will steel my resolve for the War on Christmas that is yet to come.

Yours, As Always,

Ethan

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*gif of Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert clapping and saying "Bravo!" here*

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My Dearest Esther,

As I write this I am in shock. The Unitarians surprised us while we were hiding the eggs, and have taken us prisoner.

They've tried to soften the blow by saying "Oh you must be freezing, young man! Please come in and warm up. Let me get you a cup of tea and a bit of something to eat", then promised that there would be something called a 'pot luck' after their service. I can only assume some of us will be in the pot. I am afraid.

Your loving husband

Ethan

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In the picture it looks like junior has taken to using spray on hair. Like the stuff the ghoulish Stephen Miller liked to use.

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I thinks it's just shoe polish...

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It would be more interesting to know which WingNuts didn't buy a bible. Even more interesting to know if they ever read it or if they just have one and rewrite it in their heads to match their own beliefs.

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The only thing the Trump family cares about is who didn't buy a Trump bible.

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How on earth would my bank know if I bought a bible. Amazon probably would, but that information does not go to my bank--only the credit card charges do.

No wonder the Repub cult wants to keep people stupid, starting with the Repubs at the top apparently.

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The irony here is that PAB Sr. knows well that is not true cause he has depended on various banks - both US and foreign to keep his secrets.

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Father (PAB) -- Son (Junior) -- and Holy Crap.

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Not only do REAL Catholics wear out their bibles from reading them HARD, they must go to BANK to specifically withdraw the exact amount a BI-Bowl costs. That’s how the banks gitcha. That’s how they gitcha.

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A lost artifact from the Disqus days: I find your take interesting and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Say that now, you just get a request to follow their Substack.

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Subsnack is pure shite...

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Does he need a grownup or a policeman?

Did anyone ask him if he and Kimmy dropped in for Mass on Sunday? Or any other day--I'd be willing to give them full credit for Saturday evening.

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He needs to be brain-washed. His brain is dirty and clogged with bad stuff.

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