Good Thing All Of Our Childhood Toys/Pets Have Saved Christmas At One Point Or Another!
If not, then where would we be?
Happy Christmas! Or Happy Wednesday! Whichever works for you!
By now, it is entirely possible that you are sick to death of Christmas carols, Christmas decorations, Christmas shopping, etc. But can we ever truly be sick of Christmas specials? Well, we probably can — but that’s what I’m bringing you this morning anyway. Because I love you.
First up, we have one that you should not even try to watch, because honestly it’s so degraded that neither my sister nor I could make out any actual words in the first five minutes and then gave up. But you know what? It’s The Pillow People Save Christmas, and I think it’s something we all needed to know actually exists.
Remember those things? I had the blonde lady one, my sister had the sleepy one, and both DJ Tanner and my across-the-street neighbor had the one that was somehow also a window for reasons I was never entirely clear on!
I do have questions about this that might have been answered by the movie, were I able to decipher what any of the Pillow People were actually saying.
Who will save Christmas next? The Glo Friends! Which I guess is what the Glo Worm and their friends are called (I assume the Glo Worm was non-binary)!
This one is quite the star-studded affair, with Carroll O’Connor playing Santa and Sally Struthers playing Blanche, the Wicked Witch of the North Pole, who looks a little like Carol Channing.
Honestly I like her a lot and feel like she’d be a lot of fun to hang out with. I’d fit right in with my snow queen nails.
Moving forward, we have The Bratz Babies Save Christmas. Because apparently not only were there Bratz dolls, but there were also Bratz babies, and one time they saved Christmas. I could not tell you much more about them!
Next, we have this treasure from The Asylum, a production company best known for making the Sharknado films, plus a ton of mockbuster classics such as Allan Quatermain and the Temple of Skulls, Titanic II (not the cartoon one), Snakes on a Train, The Da Vinci Treasure, Alien vs. Hunter and more. It’s called Kittens Save Christmas, and I’m just going to assume it is a mockbuster of Doctor Zhivago.
And finally, we have what multiple lists I found on the internet declared to be the worst Christmas movie of all time … 12 Pups of Christmas! But only the trailer, because if you want to see the whole thing, you’ll have to go somewhere other than YouTube (it’s free on like six different streaming services).
I have never seen it or even heard of it, but it comes from MarVista Entertainment, which has produced many of the best/worst Lifetime movies I have ever seen, so I look forward to checking it out!
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Talk amongst yourselves, it’s your Christmas Day OPEN THREAD!
So did anyone notice the thing on BlueSky that's blowing up right now? Christopher Nolan who made a good Batman movie or two is now announcing his next project: a cinematic adaptation of The Odyssey.
And what happens on Twitter? All the Nolan fans are in disbelief that anyone could have heard of a 2,000 year old poem written in another language and calling Nolan "The GOAT" for his incredible research skills in discovering this obscure work.
So now BlueSky is mocking all the Twitter dinguses, and I'm **mostly** here for it.
I mean, it's not really that some folks think they've never heard of The Odyssey (of course they have b/c references are everywhere, they just don't remember). It's that they think Nolan is some sort of god of esoterica b/c he knew a poem they didn't, and then when it's pointed out to them that The Odyssey isn't actually esoteric, they've decided to declare themselves morally superior to the people who have heard of it -- except Nolan, of course -- because if you've heard of any Homer that doesn't eat donuts, you're a stuck up self-important prig of a loser.
And while there's no reason to mock someone for not knowing something, there are excellent reasons to mock someone for believing that ignorance = moral righteousness.
Bear-y Christmas!
https://substack.com/@ziggywiggy/note/c-83033623?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=2knfuc