God’s Waiting Room did not disappoint this week, so let’s dive right in! We’ll begin in Florida's northeast corner, the part that would probably rather be Georgia (and not the good parts of Georgia), where the good sheriff of Duval County has put his finger on
I totally wanna play "ping pong" with that Tottsie on the p.p. table there. Can somebody in here hook me up? (I assume it's some Wonketeer's mom or grandmom.)
<i>&quot;State Rep. Greg Steube argued his bill (HB 4005) would make campuses safer because a shooter could be stopped by a gun owner....&quot;</i>
Rep. Steube should also support guns in courtrooms, legislature committees and day care centers for the same reason. Especially because we now know toddlers are ready, willing and able to stand their ground (in a wobbly, toddly kinda way).
But why stop with there. He should speak up for guns on airplanes*. Imagine how much faster, easier and safer air travel will be if passengers can pack heat. No more delays while TSA perverts feeling you up**. No more leaving your box cutter <i>and</i> your gun at home. And if more guns make us more safer, air travel will be the safest place on (and off!) the earth. _________________________________________ * On average TSA stops six people each day with a gun. I assume they all say they &quot;forgot&quot; about the gun which means they would also forget to use it if one of Wayne LaPierre&#039;s fantasies comes to pass.
** When I was in China, they don&#039;t care about gender at security checkpoints. One time I was patted down by a female agent. Needless to say, I never thought anything like that would happen to me! I tried to remain calm as her hands passed over my body again and again, lingering in the best places. I looked down and she was smiling mischievously. &quot;You found my gun,&quot; I said with a wink. &quot;I know,&quot; she replied, then slowly licked her lips. ... Um, it&#039;s possible I&#039;m mis-remembering this incident.
I am trying to learn Spanish so I can watch telenovelas on Univision. (Those people have big problems and low cut blouses.) Anyway I read the Espa&ntilde;ol a little differently. Perhaps some idioms are involved.
<i>el trabajo</i> ... &quot;hard work&quot; or &quot;the work&quot; <i>Pero, ustedes son bienvenidos con nosotros</i> ... &quot;you all are welcome with us&quot; or &quot;But, you are welcome with us&quot;. Also what does that mean in English?
Enjoy your (possibly false) memories. I&#039;ve been patted down quite few times, and only remember thinking &quot;Good, I may finally get on the fucking plane&quot;.
Initially I read Heronimus as <a href="http:\/\/img.posterlounge.de\/images\/wbig\/hieronymus-bosch-die-hoelle-190240.jpg" target="_blank">Hieronymus</a>.
At first glance the two parents&#039; names looked to me like they might be pseudonyms, similar to the familiar John/Jane Doe scheme. But after rereading the quote I realized that it was only the man&#039;s name that looked contrived. It was probably used in the news story as a substitute for a familiar name like Knonam Given, which is apparently a very common one in Florida.
<i>&quot;it may be a smart idea to stay away from Florida college campuses for the foreseeable future&quot;</i>
When is that a dumb idea?
I totally wanna play &quot;ping pong&quot; with that Tottsie on the p.p. table there. Can somebody in here hook me up? (I assume it&#039;s some Wonketeer&#039;s mom or grandmom.)
<i>&quot;State Rep. Greg Steube argued his bill (HB 4005) would make campuses safer because a shooter could be stopped by a gun owner....&quot;</i>
Rep. Steube should also support guns in courtrooms, legislature committees and day care centers for the same reason. Especially because we now know toddlers are ready, willing and able to stand their ground (in a wobbly, toddly kinda way).
But why stop with there. He should speak up for guns on airplanes*. Imagine how much faster, easier and safer air travel will be if passengers can pack heat. No more delays while TSA perverts feeling you up**. No more leaving your box cutter <i>and</i> your gun at home. And if more guns make us more safer, air travel will be the safest place on (and off!) the earth. _________________________________________ * On average TSA stops six people each day with a gun. I assume they all say they &quot;forgot&quot; about the gun which means they would also forget to use it if one of Wayne LaPierre&#039;s fantasies comes to pass.
** When I was in China, they don&#039;t care about gender at security checkpoints. One time I was patted down by a female agent. Needless to say, I never thought anything like that would happen to me! I tried to remain calm as her hands passed over my body again and again, lingering in the best places. I looked down and she was smiling mischievously. &quot;You found my gun,&quot; I said with a wink. &quot;I know,&quot; she replied, then slowly licked her lips. ... Um, it&#039;s possible I&#039;m mis-remembering this incident.
Bat Boy would be an improvement.
I am trying to learn Spanish so I can watch telenovelas on Univision. (Those people have big problems and low cut blouses.) Anyway I read the Espa&ntilde;ol a little differently. Perhaps some idioms are involved.
<i>el trabajo</i> ... &quot;hard work&quot; or &quot;the work&quot; <i>Pero, ustedes son bienvenidos con nosotros</i> ... &quot;you all are welcome with us&quot; or &quot;But, you are welcome with us&quot;. Also what does that mean in English?
Would that be &quot;cross my palms with&quot; Silver?
Florida? I thought the circus was in Iowa this weekend.
Enjoy your (possibly false) memories. I&#039;ve been patted down quite few times, and only remember thinking &quot;Good, I may finally get on the fucking plane&quot;.
Save the Bales.
Initially I read Heronimus as <a href="http:\/\/img.posterlounge.de\/images\/wbig\/hieronymus-bosch-die-hoelle-190240.jpg" target="_blank">Hieronymus</a>.
At first glance the two parents&#039; names looked to me like they might be pseudonyms, similar to the familiar John/Jane Doe scheme. But after rereading the quote I realized that it was only the man&#039;s name that looked contrived. It was probably used in the news story as a substitute for a familiar name like Knonam Given, which is apparently a very common one in Florida.