Hegseth Dropped Military Flu Vaccine Mandate, Top Air Force Training Base Finds Out

Flyboys now fluboys. And flugirls. Err, fluwomen ... wait, we'll come back in again.

Look, we know Top Gun was the Navy and the flu outbreak is at an Air Force base. Just roll with it, OK?

Back in April, Fox News Drunk Pete Hegseth, who somehow won confirmation to be Defense Secretary, had a great idea to keep the administration’s lunatic base happy: He ended the Pentagon’s requirement that all service members get the flu vaccine. The move was modeled on the Trump administration’s decision last year to end mandatory COVID vaccinations. After years of lying to themselves that COVID is “no worse than the flu,” the numpties have apparently convinced themselves that influenza is no big deal either.

That’s despite the fact that flu hospitalizes hundreds of thousands of Americans annually and leads to tens of thousands of deaths. But those most at risk are older people and young children, so in the eugenics-driven logic of this administration, there’s no need to worry. Those groups aren’t warfighters, so fuck ‘em. The fit will survive and the unfit are expendable.

Repealing the military flu vaccine mandate was a bold step forward for individual freedom, Hegseth said, claiming that requiring vaccines for all service members was “just overly broad and not rational.” He explained that the people who keep America safe should have the right to increase their chances of getting sick and spreading the flu to others they serve with, often in restricted spaces like barracks, submarines, and aircraft. Said the dipshit, “Our new policy is simple: If you, an American warrior entrusted to defend this nation, believe that the flu vaccine is in your best interest, then you are free to take it; you should. But we will not force you. Because your body, your faith are not negotiable.” Then an eagle landed on his shoulder and everyone clapped.

The effectiveness of Hegseth’s new policy became instantly clear this week, at least for the flu virus: Thanks to a sharp drop in vaccination rates among new recruits, a flu outbreak at Lackland Air Force has left around 220 people sick so far, sending at least two people to hospitals. In addition to the reported flu cases, the Air Force is also investigating the death last week of trainee Keon McDaniel, who was in his sixth week of basic when he “experienced a medical emergency” June 12. He was taken to Brooke Army Medical Center on Joint Base San Antonio, where he later died. It’s not yet clear whether his death was linked to the flu outbreak, but we’re sure the Pentagon will inform the public as soon as the investigation makes a finding, because this is the most transparent administration in history, right?

Lackland AFB is where all new enlisted members of the Air Force and Air National Guard (ooh, and Spaaaaace Forrrrce too!) go for basic military training. As the New York Times points out, it’s an ideal theater of operations for highly motivated warrior viruses to attack and overwhelm undefended targets of opportunity, because “new recruits sleep on bunk beds in open bays and share meals at large communal tables.”

After Hegseth ended the flu vaccine mandate, vaccination rates among incoming recruits dropped from nearly 100 percent to only around 40 percent, proving that when people are free to make decisions about their own health, they will always make wise choices. Except for when they don’t.

Even so, it’s all about individual freedom and autonomy, because what is basic training but a festival of open-minded Socratic dialogue about making voluntary choices in your own best interests?

R. Lee Ermey’s character in Full Metal Jacket encourages Private Joker to think for himself, weigh his options, and do what he considers best.

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Hegseth said in April that it was all about respecting servicemembers’ religious beliefs (and dedication to wackaloon conspiracy theories), which had been violated by Joe Biden, America’s greatest enemy:

“Our men and women in uniform were forced to choose between their conscience and their country, even when those decisions posed no threat to our military readiness,” Hegseth said. “That era of betrayal is over. Under President Trump, the War Department continues to take decisive action to once again restore freedom and strength to our joint force. We’re seizing this moment to discard any absurd overreaching mandates that only weaken our warfighting capabilities.”

Hegseth has not been available to comment on how the outbreak at Lackland has strengthened America’s warfighting capabilities, but maybe he’ll eventually point out that since many or most of those who fell ill were in basic training, they weren’t even ready to fight any wars just yet, so what’s the big deal?

The Times notes that in April, when Hegseth rolled back the flu vaccine mandate, Sen. Roger Wicker (R-Mississippi) said that maybe doing so might be a bad idea. Wicker, an Air Force veteran, said, “The reason it was mandatory was to enhance readiness. […] You know, you do give up certain rights when you take the oath. It’s just part of it.” What wild, rebellious thinking!

Also too, let’s all take a quick moment to glare our most skeptical glare at the Times for including this utterly nonsense sentence in its coverage of the Lackland outbreak:

While he has changed his tone since the spring, Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. has a history of loudly questioning the safety and effectiveness of many standard vaccines.

No, RFK Jr. has not “changed his tone” on vaccines, as Yr Wonkette pointed out when the Times started pushing that nonsense in April. He has always said very different things about vaccines when he’s talking to his tribe of antivaxxer zealots and when he’s talking to normal people, and shame once more on the Times for continuing to sanewash his extremism.

Fortunately, not everyone in the Pentagon is as stupid as Hegseth. In response to the outbreak, the Air Force has allowed an exemption to Hegseth’s new policy so all recruits at Lackland can be ordered to get the flu vaccine as part of the effort to contain the spread of the virus. As of blogtime, we haven’t yet heard of any brave warriors refusing the shots or complaining that the new mandate is tyrannical. We guess that during a flu outbreak, there aren’t a lot of antivaxxers in foxholes, or in barracks.

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Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Nowhere Near As Good At Bullsh*tting As He Thinks He Is

Pete Hegseth Already So Good At Pentagon-ning, He Doesn't Even Need Drinks!

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[ABC News / NYT]

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