368 Comments
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David Hendrickson's avatar

Spot on!

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Maybe's avatar

If he finds abortion and marijuana sexy, he is a pervert.

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DemoCat's avatar

You never refer to abortion as “sexy,” even though he clearly meant it was a high-interest topic for voters. But people like Santorum are foolish and say and think foolish things. Or, maybe he actually finds abortion sexy, which is possible given republican men’s affection for it when their own teenage daughters are pregnant, or their own mistresses. Because conservative mistresses are for secret sex, not making babies. That’s the correct order of the universe, so that makes it ok.

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Clark Nova's avatar

Santorum Secret Sauce. Eeeewwww.

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Nemo's avatar

This guy's continued existence is proof that no god exists. Zeus, or Hera, or Athena would have sent him to Hades by now. I'm still gonna believe in Aphrodite though. For reasons.

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Maybe's avatar

Hades wouldn't take him. He has standards.

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Charles  Schlotter's avatar

And that applies equally to the existence of The Kooch and Weirdo Newsmax "Reporter" Dude.

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3FingerPete's avatar

It's democracy's fault!

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Fluffy Bunny's avatar

It's always "the peoples" fault when a "man of the people" can't will.

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pangolin100's avatar

I've heard that his secret sauce is a frothy mix.

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Maybe's avatar

Many thanks still to Dan Savage. Perhaps it's time for an update.

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Clark Nova's avatar

Says so right in the dictionary.

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smokefilledroommate's avatar

I forgot about Fetus in a Jar!!

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cynmac's avatar

Known as 'Jar Baby Gabriel'

People are saying the same thing about Barbara Bush - that she brought a Jar Baby home so her kids could see their sibling.

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Clark Nova's avatar

What would you expect from Aleister Crowley's love child?

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Doloras LaPicho's avatar

Why does Ken Cuccinelli wear exactly the same shirt/tie combo as Jim Jordan?

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Charles  Schlotter's avatar

Their tastes in shirt/tie combos are the same as their other, uhhhh, tastes?

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Davis's avatar

Oh, they were fine with pure democracy when proposition 13 was passed in 1978: imposing 2/3 vote requirement of the Legislature for state taxes and 2/3 voter approval requirement for local special taxes. California's school system went from being the best in the country to, well, not so good.

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Liminal's avatar

Hey Ken, maybe the problem with getting your candidates to win is that Americans hate your shitty policies

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Maybe's avatar

I have long thought that people on the radical right believe that the rest of us truly believe just as they do, but we say otherwise to be annoying.

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theCryptofishist's avatar

You'd think Santorum would know better than to say "secret sauce."

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Runfastandwin's avatar

Every time I see the word santorum my nose plugs itself...

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Sally Zubyk's avatar

-- Sexy things like abortion and marijuana are sure to bring out the youth (you know, their hedonistic minds are always in the gutter) and golly gee, Ohioans, don't you realize how dangerous dabbling in "pure democracies" are not the way to run a country. I don't know where I've been, I just never realized Rick's level of erudition before listening to his words of wisdom after this election.

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Governor LePetomane's avatar

"pure democracies are not the way to run a country"

TFG nods head approvingly.

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Bagels of Doom's avatar

wait! WHAR SWEATERVEST?

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