Human Butt-Hair JD Vance Dodges Simple Question In Smarmiest Way Imaginable
It's a 'yes or no' question, butt-hair!
Someone help smarm goblin JD Vance out with this apparently impossible question: Did Donald Trump lose the 2020 election, yes or no?
On Friday The New York Times dropped a clip of a podcast interview with Vance in which the interviewer asked a version of that question of the vice presidential candidate no less than five times in three minutes. Vance, in a fit of twisting and slithering that would put a python to shame, found multiple ways to not answer.
First, Vance tried to do the same pivot as he had on the debate stage with Tim Walz almost two weeks ago:
“Do you believe he lost the 2020 election?”
“I think that Donald Trump and I have both raised a number of issues with the 2020 election, but we’re focused on the future. I think there’s an obsession here with focusing on 2020.”
Ell-Oh-Ell, Trump hasn’t stopped whining about the 2020 election for four years. He has made it a central promise of his campaign that if he wins, he is going to seek vengeance on anyone who investigated him for inciting a coup on January 6 because the courts kept shooting down his challenges. He still claims that he was merely exercising his responsibility as president to ensure electoral integrity.
He’s over it about as much as Glenn Close was over Michael Douglas.
Lulu Garcia-Navarro immediately tried again, asking directly, “Senator, yes or no? Did Donald Trump lose the 2020 election?” Vance immediately reached for the age-old trick of answering the question with another question. Got her, debate boy:
“Let me ask you a question. Is it OK that big technology companies censored the Hunter Biden laptop story, which independent analysts have said cost Donald Trump millions of votes?”
Ah, there’s that focus on the future we were just hearing about five seconds ago! Listen, you flaming human butt-hair, didn’t your campaign just prove this week that suppressing stories on Twitter comes down to who Elon Musk is rooting for in the election?
RECEIPTS.
Let’s not get all high and mighty about Twitter suppressing the Hunter Biden story when your own campaign did the same thing to a potentially unflattering story about you the instant it had the power.
Garcia-Navarro tried a third time, and once again HUNTER BIDEN:
“Did big technology companies censor a story that independent studies have suggested would have cost Trump millions of votes? I think that’s the question.”
Millions of votes. Millions. Of votes. We either hadn’t heard this one before, or we had heard it and found it so stupid that we pushed it out of our brain immediately to make room for a more pleasant memory like that time we had to have a cystoscopy. But the theory goes something like this: In the wake of the 2020 election, the wingnut group Media Research Center did a push poll of Biden voters, asking them this question:
“At the time you cast your vote for president, were you aware that evidence exists, including bank transactions the FBI is currently investigating, that directly links Joe Biden and his family to a corrupt financial arrangement between a Chinese company with connections to the Chinese Communist Party that was secretly intended to provide the Biden family with tens of millions of dollars in profits?”
This is what a court of law would refer to as “leading the witness.” Philip Bump debunked the whole thing for The Washington Post a couple of years ago by showing how the MRC’s conclusion was statistically insignificant.
The whole theory is bullshit, though that poll question is the sort of garbage you would expect an outfit founded by wingnut garbage demon Brent Bozell to ask. We would also like to take a moment to wish Brent’s son good luck on that four-year prison sentence he is serving over his trying to coup the government with the rest of the nuts on Jan. 6.
Garcia-Navarro, God love her, persisted, asking Vance a fourth time if Donald Trump lost the 2020 election. Vance responded by explaining his deflection strategy to her, like an overeager debate team kid:
“Did big technology companies censor a story that independent studies have suggested would have cost Trump millions of votes? I think that’s the question.”
Note how in the video through all of this yapping, Vance’s eyes look like two black pits of nothingness. He’s like something out of a Lovecraft story. Chilling.
Garcia-Navarro tried one last time, phrasing the question slightly differently, not that it mattered:
“Senator, would you have certified the election in 2020, yes or no?”
“I’ve said that I would have voted against certification because of the concern that I just raised. I think that when you have technology companies —”
“The answer is no.”
On a side note, yr Wonkette has never seen human eyes as black as Juice Dickhead’s up there. They are like staring into two pools of nothingness. It is the most chilling experience we can recall in recent memory. Like watching a person whose entire soul has leaked out of their body. Enjoy the rest of your weekend!
Wonkette survives thanks to the generous indulgence of our readers.
“Let me ask you a question. Is it OK that big technology companies censored the Hunter Biden laptop story, which independent analysts have said cost Donald Trump millions of votes?”
Interesting that he's asking a journalist who doesn't work for Twitter, Facebook, or the Biden campaign. Asking her about a made-up topic that didn't happen. At a time when Twitter's CEO is actually taking orders from the Trump campaign to block discussion of actual hacked documents regarding Vance himself.
I am genuinely concerned for the future fates of that creature's three children. Especially his youngest, a daughter, who I am certain Couch Fucker doesn't even consider to be human on account of the fact that she is female.