How is Iowa formed? Well, fuck us running with scissors, look at this latest evidence of just how pathetic everything about Jeb Bush truly is. Deep in the 112-page internal campaign memo we told you about , in which the Jeb boasts of his hard-to-snatch endorsement by his own son, is this geography FAIL gem,
Jeb! was told there are wormholes between the different parts of Region 6, obvs.
Don't forget sector 7G.
That was the "NBC/Telemundo" debate. Maybe the RNC decided their approval ratings among Latinos weren't low enough.
Wait...he's an "intern", not a "volunteer" as Jeb! said in that 112 slide snoozefest? Hey, Mason! You could actually Make Money as an intern!
I'm guessing the Jeb?!?! campaign is writing off much of "region" six, but they never should have produced such an embarrassing map that might get leaked by a spy from another campaign.
He certainly showed those Four-Color Theorem Pointy-Heads what's what with his Iowa "map".
A demographic remark. As many political junkies know, Iowa has 99 counties. 70 of those counties have populations of fewer than 21,000 persons (and 28 of those are fewer than 10,500). 21,000 is approximately the population of the small suburb of Milwaukee where I grew up. I currently live in a county with a population of about 54,000 (43rd out of 58 in Cali -- we have 8 counties with pops less than 21,000).
My point? Iowa, for historical reasons, gets to have a ridiculously disproportionate impact on the early primary going, despite the fact that its demographics are significantly irrelevant to the nation as a whole. Fuck Iowa (sorry, Cousin Judy).
Hell, he could have used a different color for each of the 99 counties, and proved the 99-Color Theorem.
Although, he would probably had to use "Dark Avocado" (TM Terry Pratchett).
Is that the Titanic or the Ark?
Strictly speaking, you have to round up.
You ever read Accelerando? Custom avatars haranguing individual targets.
Fun book, BTW.
Iowa is a Rubik's cube, and every unpaid-Bush volunteer probably behaves as a Necker cube.
If I were his Iowa's Campaign Manager, I'd recommend to switch to a more provocative, or bolder strategy, that could include pictures of Jeff sucking a corn while looking at the camera.
Rick Perry did it in 2011 and became the front runner!
One of my favorite lines from the TV show, MASH:
Father Mulcahy: What time is it in Iowa? Major Winchester: 1882.