I've always hated V day, despite rarely being single. My beloved expressed how lucky and grateful he felt when all the guys at work were discussing their plans, gifts, etc, and when asked he was able to say that we don't celebrate it. This was met by disbelief and jealousy and he just smiled.
My darling fiancé is making vegan risotto for dinner. I love him with every fiber of my being. I gave him a box of gourmet raw organic vegan chocolate this weekend; he made quick work of it. I should have known better. At least he couldn't eat his beautiful card.
My mom used to work at a Russell Stover's plant. She told me as to how the management let the workers eat as much candy as they wanted. My mom said it was a brilliant move, because it didn't take the workers long to lose their taste for it. She said that, after a while, it just tasted like wax.
> A charitable donation — I would recommend a donation to RAICES Texas or Miry’s List any day of the year. Why not today? You can always combine it with one of the suggestions above, or a check for $1 million to your sister-wife of 57 years. Marge deserves it!
For Mom, in lieu of flowers, we directed people to http://prathamusa.org , which is a literacy-promotion charity in India.
Meh. I hear my sister's voice. She works for Kmart. 'Spent my day moving out all the Australia Day crap for the St Valentines Day crap. Straight afterwards that goes to make way for all the Easter crap....'
You still have Kmart down there? Much as I hated it when it got here, after the mom n pop stores all closed in its wake and it was the only place to buy stuff, now I miss it.
By the way, my outlet store has been carrying some products from your area lately. Thumbs up to the Red Tractor oatmeal, but boo! to Bundaberg ginger beer.
I didn't get them for Valentine's, but the spouse pissed me off right before his last birthday, so this was his gift. He thought they were hilarious, and anonymously used them to prank his friend during his bachelor party trip.
I'm 49. I'm single. I haven't had a girlfriend since 1997. I made the mistake of believing my parent's right-wing Christian bullshit about the evils of pre-martial sex, so my years for peak sexual enjoyment were spent smugly thinking I was better than all the other teenagers because I was a virgin. Granted, it wouldn't have made any difference. I was an fat, ugly, stupid slug that women wouldn't touch even if their very lives depended on it.
Despite being a meaningless Catholic holiday turned into a fuck fest by Madison Avenue, today just fills me with so much jealousy, rage, and sadness. It just feels like everyone is rubbing their sex-filled lives into my sex-deprived face. I feel like I'm being mocked for my inability to attract someone, even for just a one-night-stand.
I think I can sympathize with the incels... OK, only a little.
I hated Valentine’s Day and all the bullshit around it, even when I was coupled up. But 11 years ago today, Mapes Jr made their debut and now it is the best day ever.
Mrs. H. & I have an understanding that we don't celebrate Valentine's Day as it's the day my mother died suddenly just before I, the oldest of four, turned 13. Something about the whole thing never felt right, and it wasn't until almost 40 years later that I found out she had killed herself. My father would never admit the truth, even when I confronted him with the death certificate.
I remember when this Bow Wow Wow song came out and my friend Rodney was thrilled because the singer was cute and 14! He was 15 so close to her age. Like he actually had a chance.
This is what hubby and I do for every gift-giving occasion, cards from the dogs and then a nice dinner of some kind either out or nice expensive steaks or seafood. Tonight we're ordering in from one of our favorite restaurants.
I've always hated V day, despite rarely being single. My beloved expressed how lucky and grateful he felt when all the guys at work were discussing their plans, gifts, etc, and when asked he was able to say that we don't celebrate it. This was met by disbelief and jealousy and he just smiled.
Happy Hallmark Holiday - er I mean Valentines Day!
My darling fiancé is making vegan risotto for dinner. I love him with every fiber of my being. I gave him a box of gourmet raw organic vegan chocolate this weekend; he made quick work of it. I should have known better. At least he couldn't eat his beautiful card.
Thanks for the great work Wonkettes! Happy Valentine’s Day 💙💕🫶
My mom used to work at a Russell Stover's plant. She told me as to how the management let the workers eat as much candy as they wanted. My mom said it was a brilliant move, because it didn't take the workers long to lose their taste for it. She said that, after a while, it just tasted like wax.
> A charitable donation — I would recommend a donation to RAICES Texas or Miry’s List any day of the year. Why not today? You can always combine it with one of the suggestions above, or a check for $1 million to your sister-wife of 57 years. Marge deserves it!
For Mom, in lieu of flowers, we directed people to http://prathamusa.org , which is a literacy-promotion charity in India.
Meh. I hear my sister's voice. She works for Kmart. 'Spent my day moving out all the Australia Day crap for the St Valentines Day crap. Straight afterwards that goes to make way for all the Easter crap....'
Retail sucks as a job or career.
Heard that same tale from several friends,
You still have Kmart down there? Much as I hated it when it got here, after the mom n pop stores all closed in its wake and it was the only place to buy stuff, now I miss it.
By the way, my outlet store has been carrying some products from your area lately. Thumbs up to the Red Tractor oatmeal, but boo! to Bundaberg ginger beer.
I didn't get them for Valentine's, but the spouse pissed me off right before his last birthday, so this was his gift. He thought they were hilarious, and anonymously used them to prank his friend during his bachelor party trip.
https://www.google.com/shopping/product/1?q=ding+ding+squishy&client=ms-android-verizon&sca_esv=725712b13be26739&biw=384&bih=724&tbs=vw:g&sxsrf=ACQVn0-oqsxpVAAeb1S5Tr2W0pAebhXhjQ:1707940280654&prds=num:1,of:1,eto:6357235328246422683_0,prmr:1,pid:6357235328246422683,cs:1
If you don't want to click the link, it's tiny, cartoon penises, with faces.
Valentine's Day is VERY hard for me.
I'm 49. I'm single. I haven't had a girlfriend since 1997. I made the mistake of believing my parent's right-wing Christian bullshit about the evils of pre-martial sex, so my years for peak sexual enjoyment were spent smugly thinking I was better than all the other teenagers because I was a virgin. Granted, it wouldn't have made any difference. I was an fat, ugly, stupid slug that women wouldn't touch even if their very lives depended on it.
Despite being a meaningless Catholic holiday turned into a fuck fest by Madison Avenue, today just fills me with so much jealousy, rage, and sadness. It just feels like everyone is rubbing their sex-filled lives into my sex-deprived face. I feel like I'm being mocked for my inability to attract someone, even for just a one-night-stand.
I think I can sympathize with the incels... OK, only a little.
I was alone for all the years. Now I'm not. It makes V-Day bearable, for a huge change.
I hated Valentine’s Day and all the bullshit around it, even when I was coupled up. But 11 years ago today, Mapes Jr made their debut and now it is the best day ever.
Continuing with my Palpatine theme, here's a very disturbing Valentine Thought!
You want this, don’t you?
https://substack.com/profile/157161709-tehbaddr/note/c-49551742
Mrs. H. & I have an understanding that we don't celebrate Valentine's Day as it's the day my mother died suddenly just before I, the oldest of four, turned 13. Something about the whole thing never felt right, and it wasn't until almost 40 years later that I found out she had killed herself. My father would never admit the truth, even when I confronted him with the death certificate.
Goodness, I’m so sorry.
I remember when this Bow Wow Wow song came out and my friend Rodney was thrilled because the singer was cute and 14! He was 15 so close to her age. Like he actually had a chance.
Yeah, looking back that was totally sketchy but ...
I'm here for the inherited goats!!
Anybody see the "Jesus Wants you to be his Valentine" story? It was not from The Onion either.
This is what hubby and I do for every gift-giving occasion, cards from the dogs and then a nice dinner of some kind either out or nice expensive steaks or seafood. Tonight we're ordering in from one of our favorite restaurants.