291 Comments

I have yet to see any mention in national media of the similarity between the name "Lauren Boebert" and "Lorena Bobbitt."

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It's a question that needs to be asked. Have we ever seen them together?

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I've voted in Republican primaries (deep red state, yo) and chose the woman whenever it was an option. They're the fairer sex after all. Odd as it seems, Boebert may be less dangerous to civilization than her competitors are.

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"Colorado’s Third District is not for sale." So Boebert will stay and win because of her principles!

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I think we have moved on from "not for sale" to "finders keepers."

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“I think she’s got a serious challenge on her hands trying to explain to the voters of CD-4 why she felt it was necessary to leave CD-3 and have a better chance at keeping her seat in Congress,” - she would have serious challenge on her hands trying to explain how to make pudding.

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I think we all saw her demonstrate that skill at "Betelgeuse."

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What Lauren Boebert has on hand? Or in hand?

Honestly, the jokes just write themselves in her case.

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Jan 3·edited Jan 3

I think it would be more accurate to describe Boebert as "carpet banging", what with the perpetual scabs and scars on her knees.

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founding

She’ll get her comeuppance (The Magnificent Ambersons comes to mind); she will know know what that means, of course.

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"Hi Lauren? This is the casting agent from the Masked Singer…"

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I really miss "The Gong Show."

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Dancing With The Stars, partnered with noted environmentalist, brain surgeon and underwear model George Santos.

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Ah, the Republican mindset.

I'm Lauren Boebert. Everyone knows who I am. I don't even have to say, "Do you know who I am?" I need CD-4, because CD-3 has become problematic. It will be necessary for all Republicans to step aside and give me this one, because I need it.

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“Some party hack decreed that the people had lost the government's confidence and could only regain it with redoubled effort.

"If that is the case, would it not be be simpler, if the government simply dissolved the people and elected another?”

Bertolt Brecht, 1953

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I need to make $174K/yr because; reasons.

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To be fair, it’s difficult for 34 year old grandmas to make a living out here when there’s only so many monster truck rallies to appear at.

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True, I miss the elegance and savoir-faire of the Palins.

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And it's not like they are paying NYC rates, even for anal.

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Ta, Stephen. Once she loses the primary, I never want to hear or read Lauren B's name again. Ever.

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Not even stupid enough to out-Palin Palin.

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>>He has $4.3 million cash on hand. We don’t want to talk about what Boebert has on hand.

You gotta warn me next time; I was on a work call and unmuted, and apparently random snorting sounds are a problem on Teams calls.

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founding

I should probably scroll down before posting this, but here goes...

♫ Brave Dame Lauren ran away,

Ran away, away away,

When electoral defeat raised its ugly head,

She bravely turned around and fled,

Brave, brave, brave Dame Lauren! ♫

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Bobo can blame Hollywood all she wants but the one person to blame for her pre electoral flameout is the one she looks at in the mirror. Not the person whose dick she's massaging.

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Jan 2·edited Jan 3

Rifle, CO is the armpit of the state. I doubt that repubs in the 4th District will be happy to accept someone who was too sleazy for Rifle as their representative. The grift has run out.

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And where does she go from here? Divorced, 17-year-old son's a parent, toxic to the only people who'll have anything to do with her...

It's make you wonder if she's always been this bad in the life choices department.

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Oh she has always been this bad. Remember she married her now ex husband AFTER he was arrested for showing his winkie to underage girls. And was at a concert drunk where she egged on some teens being questioned by police for drinking. When the police begin to question her Boebert became aggressive and was arrested too. There were other incidents but those are the ones I remember. Yes, she's always been trash.

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I’ve said it elsewhere before. Bobo cannot stand the fact that she is going to lose her $175k salary and knows it. She’s skeert cuz going back to the $1 general as a cashier sucks. Only Fans would be more $$ for her but then she’d age out soon enough and back to the General for her. Also too she’d never get back into office after that. She’ll also lose out on her cushy healthcare and retirement.

So glad that she’s going to be gone. FAFO.

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Never again will she get paid that much for doing nothing.

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Fox “News?”

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Whichever Palin brazenly had the kid out of wedlock is, last time I heard, working as a receptionist at a medical clinic.

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If she's willing to put on a blonde wig and have a little plastic surgery, Fox News might be interested.

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I’m betting that that is her goal. It seems to be the goal for all these idiots. Politics and then right wing nut pundits on some news show.

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There's on two settings on people like her:

1. Vote for me because I am crushing 'our' enemies!

2. Vote for me because 'our' enemies are going to defeat me!

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