More Mystery At Zorro Ranch!
If petroglyphs could talk.
Last Thursday, before and after we saged our laptop, we told you about how on Monday officials in New Mexico had searched the property formerly known as Epstein’s Zorro ranch, a spooky, blustery parcel on a remote high desert plateau between Santa Fe and Albuquerque, after an anonymous email tip from 2019 claimed that two girls were buried there. But that tip, as with most others, was never investigated, and the ranch was never searched, in spite of multiple reports that children had been raped there.
And shit gets so much weirder, y’all. The man who quietly bought that land in 2023 was former Republican Texas state Senator, Don Blaine Huffines:
… who immediately set to secretly digging the property up with backhoes, no permits requested. Once reporters found out, Huffines said his plan all along had been to make the place a Christian retreat, but the county says he has not requested nor filled out any paperwork for either permits or to operate such a thing, either. And Huffines is not just some rich entitled sack of shit who might be able to pretend that he didn’t know any better; before he was a state Senator he was a career real estate developer. Who is now running to be the Comptroller of Texas! Huffines knows full well how building permits work, and wants to make keeping tabs on Texas’s financial paperwork his entire job. But either he figured he was a special exception to getting his digging shut down, as it now has, and, or, Some People Are Wondering if he thought the risk of immediately digging up the place was worth it because there’s some evidence on that ranch he wants to try and hide for one or more of his GOP pals. Who can say!
It seems unlikely any evidence would be left after so much time, or able to be located in the ranch’s vast 7,600-acre expanse, especially after Epstein’s Belarusian dentist girlfriend had ample time to clean it up before it was seized to pay Epstein’s debts, but who knows.
And Don Huffines’ Trump connection is HMMM. Both he and his twin brother Phillip are OG Tea Partiers cum bigtime Texas MAGA, GOP and Trump donors. Yes, of course Don has a twin brother in this wacked-out hallucinatory Nancy Drew hellscape we’re all now forced to inhabit.
Don Huffines was so MAGA that in the Texas senate, along with the usual MAGA crap, he wrote a bill to end vehicle safety inspections. Naturally, another hobbyhorse of his attacking the Texas Department of Child and Family Services for being too woke, huh! Those MAGA Republicans sure do hate anything that tries to rescue children from abuse with the heat of a thousand suns. And eventually Huffines got too nuts for even Texas, in 2018 voters in his district booted him in favor of a Democratic candidate for the first time in decades.
And not only was Zorro ranch never searched by local authorities regarding the tips about sex abuse or dead bodies, or by federal ones, after then-AG Bill Barr unusually ordered a shut down of all investigations into Epstein’s doings five days after he died, other suspected Epstein crimes were also ignored. Epstein was alleged to have destroyed petroglyphs on the property, and was suspected of harboring other stolen artifacts, including the circa 1760’s “death bell” stolen in the 1930s from the Jose de Gracia Mission Church in Las Trampas. And there were those dinosaur bones he, Ghislaine Maxwell and RFK Jr. allegedly looted together. Literary foreshadowing even the Brady Bunch writer’s room couldn’t come up with!
Another topic and another odd coincidence, on July 2, 2008, two days after Epstein began serving his Florida prison sentence, the Zorro Trust company won the Oklahoma state Powerball lottery for $85 million. Just Jeffrey Epstein picking up a ticket on a whim at the 7-11 with his butterscotches? This blog is sus by stating as a fact that Ghislaine Maxwell stole a baby (which of course might have actually happened, but is only an unsubstantiated diary entry in the files as of now), but the Powerball ticket win did happen against unbelievable odds following technical difficulties, and it’s all an interesting read.
Back to dinosaur bones, Epstein also ingratiated himself with a lot of scientists who happened to be into eugenics also. Or “transhumanism,” which is just eugenics with computers. People like Peter Thiel, or George M. Church, a molecular engineer working on gene editing. And Epstein was obsessed with the subject of breeding a genetically superior race with his über-sperm, he was not shy about it:
Once, at a dinner at Epstein’s mansion on Manhattan’s Upper East Side, Lanier said he talked to a scientist who told him that Epstein’s goal was to have 20 women at a time impregnated at his 33,000-square-foot Zorro Ranch in a tiny town outside Santa Fe. Lanier said the scientist identified herself as working at NASA, but he did not remember her name.
Epstein also had his own genome sequenced, and wanted to use CRISPR to edit and improve his genes.
But was Jeffrey Epstein actually doing Dr. Frank N. Furter style medical experiments on his ranch and making and stealing babies? Did he build a secret incinerator? (Seems a bit wild, as there would be no reason not to have an incinerator on a remote ranch with no trash collection, so therefore to hide one, but again, who knows.) And what about how New Mexico state Rep. Andrea Romero claimed “people had been “coming forward saying they were drugged” and had their “sex organs and sperm harvested from their bodies”? Are they credible people, are these reports corroborated in any way? When you cannot trust the FBI or any authorities to do anything but cover up and smear victims, rumors will swirl, and all you can say is again, who fucking knows if any Jurassic-Park type experiments on human slaves actually happened.
More lookie-here: Epstein’s accountant since 2005, Richard Kahn, testified behind closed doors to the House Oversight Committee. Unshockingly he said he didn’t see anything or know anything, even though Epstein had, like, accounts at JP Morgan Chase with six figures of money under girls’ first names with no social security number attached them that Kahn facilitated payments to, and Epstein’s books had enough flapping red flags that he was being investigated by the DEA for suspected drug dealing and money laundering from 2015 until some unknown time. And when the FBI came to raid Epstein’s manse, it was Kahn who had servants pack up two suitcases with the contents of a certain safe and squirrel them away. So safe to say, hyuk, Kahn knows more than he’s saying.
Also the HOC wants to depose Tova Noel, the prison security guard suspected of being paid to cover up Epstein’s murder.
Drip, drip, drip, Clarice.
Ps., Zorro would’ve slashed all their asses.
[Santa Fe New Mexican archive link / NPR / Bloomberg archive link]
Thank you for the Florence + The Machine link!
Damn, that elephant upstairs had too much coffee this morning.
Where's Edison when you need him?
I apologize that is a very dark joke coming from me, but still... you sick fucks love dark humor!