Oh No, Will ICE-Tracking App Ruin Stephen Miller's Home Depot Kidnapping Quota?
Is that it? Is that why they're threatening to put CNN in jail? Did we cut through the bullshit?
Yesterday, Donald Trump got to go on a field trip to visit his first domestic concentration camp, where he could make alligator chomper sounds and gather spank bank material of all the human trafficking he’s going to do out of there.
DHS Secretary Nazi Barbie Kristi Noem also happened to be there, doing one of her rugged-type fashion photo shoots for Instagram, and she really showed her Nazi ass when a reporter asked about the neat new app people are using in LA and elsewhere to tell them if there are any ICE Gestapo active nearby and where.
Speaking in the serious tones of a Nazi influencer who got interrupted in the middle of a blowout to comment on the latest rumors of Anne Frank in an attic, she said:
ICE NAZI BARBIE: We’re working with the Department of Justice to see if we can prosecute [CNN] for that, because what they’re doing is actively encouraging people to avoid law enforcement activities and operations, and we’re gonna actually go after them and prosecute them with the partnership of Pam if we can because what they’re doing, we believe, is illegal.
Yes, if you remember, they are going to put CNN in jail, for letting people know about ICE Grindr or ICE Yelp or ICE Waze or whatever it is called. (ICEBlock.)
Oh boy, they sure are mad, though!
Dumbfucks always are when they’re being outsmarted.
Last night on Fox News — or as influencers call it, THREE COSTUME CHANGES LATER, AMIRITE MADAM SECRETARY? — Noem and Sean Hannity got lathered up together, angry at CNN for criminally masterminding this devious plot that involved finding out about a story and then doing a news report on it. (To be entirely fair, it looks like Noem was wearing the same exact ugly stupid bedazzled white Make America Great Again baseball cap she was wearing at the concentration camp, so maybe she didn’t do costume changes and she totally smelled like humidity and alligator shit, who knows? Totally fresh makeup, obviously.)
Hannity set her all the way up. He cited the maybe fake, maybe not “700 percent increase” in (alleged) assaults on (alleged) ICE agents, because these mouthbreathing motherfuckers gotta rile up the racist pigs at home and make them think people are doing this to target ICE, as opposed to try to keep ICE from kidnapping/human trafficking/exterminating them in one way or another.
Isn’t CNN “aiding and abetting in the lawbreaking,” asked Hannity? Isn’t it “obstructing justice”?
(Reminder: The people who hid Anne Frank in the attic were breaking the law. Hitler’s law. Of course, Fox News viewers would have been watching the 1939 Nazi version of Sean Hannity, so history is doing a lot of rhyming here.)
Hannity was glad to report that Pam Bondi was “very open to looking into the criminality of it.” (Of course she is, because she’s one of them too, and committed to the lie that this is being used as a threat to our poor, put-upon masked Gestapo. Also probably because, as reports suggest, she’s not really running DOJ, and is more of just a lady who goes on TV and says stuff while Stephen Miller actually is in charge. Same with Ms. Instagram here.)
NOEM: Yes, absolutely, I believe in my opinion that they are, and that’s why I’m so thrilled that Pam is willing to be proactive and go after those individuals that would perpetuate this activity against our law enforcement officers.
Wait, what is CNN’s “crime” again? That’s right, doing a news report on a thing that is happening.
Probably more realistically, DHS Secretary Stephen Miller is glad Attorney General Stephen Miller has agreed to pursue an investigation against CNN for potentially informing more innocent Latino mommies and grandpas and babies with cancer of the existence of an app that might help them escape getting murdered by the Gestapo. This might put a dent in White House Immigration Nazi Stephen Miller’s stated quota for how many people are supposed to get tortured and kidnapped at the Home Depot each day.
Is that it? Did we figure out what this latest bullshit is all about?
Remember, kids: If an app causes you to defy den Führer, sie ist eine illegal app!
IST DAS KLAR?
OPEN THREAD.
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