Republicans Don't Understand What Furries Are, And That Should Tell Us Everything
Seriously, how does anyone avoid knowing what a furry is?
For quite some time now, sitting Republicans, Republican candidates, and conservatives all over have been desperately doubling down on their insistence that there are children "identifying" as "furries" who are being accommodated at school with litter boxes in the hallways.
It is actually incredible that anyone believes this. It's less believable than practically any other urban legend to make the rounds in decades. Steve from Blues Clues dying of a heroin overdose? More believable. Paul from The Wonder Years is Marilyn Manson? Sure, why not? If you say Bloody Mary in the mirror three times will the former Queen of England appear and murder you? Could happen!
Teachers do keep litter around at schools, but it's not for this. It's actually in case kids are trapped in classrooms for a long period of time during an active shooter situation. But that's not what we're gonna talk about right now. At least not until I finish the video I am making to announce the official rules of my $100 (Plus Owning A Lib, I Guess) Litter Boxes In Schools Challenge , inspired by the late James Randi.
No, we're gonna talk about the fact that somehow, these people are living in the year 2022 and still somehow don't know what the hell a furry actually is — to the point where they think that:
A) There are child furries
B) Furry is a thing people "identify" as
C) Furries actually believe they are the sort of animal they dress up as
D) Furries go around dressing up as their fursona literally all of the time
D) Furries use litter boxes
Admittedly, I don't know how one goes to the bathroom in public in a giant mascot costume. I can't imagine it's a good or easy time, but I'm also a person who won't even wear rompers. Maybe there's like a flap at the bottom like Dr. Dentons? I couldn't tell you! All I can tell you is that they don't use litter boxes, because of how they are humans.
Since the 2000s, there have been an incredible number of television shows, specials, documentaries, articles etc. on furries. Several of them on both MTV and TLC. The only things there were more of these sorts of things on were purity balls and Quiverfull families with a million kids (and one child molester).
It is also entirely possible to just Google and find out what furries are if one is somehow unclear. They choose not to.
Clearly, the good conservatives of red, red Mississippi know how to type it into the PornHub search bar, at least ...
No clue what lesbian yoga porn is
What I'm saying here is that even if one somehow spent the last 20 years under a rock or being Amish, it is very easy to find out what a damn furry is and is not. They don't bother . As with everything else, this is something that could be corrected just by learning a little bit about the thing they are supposedly mad at and using the tiniest bit of critical thinking skills to determine if it could possibly be true.
Usually when the Right finds out they've been hoaxed again, they like to say "Well the fact that we believed it tells you a lot about this society and how bad you all have gotten!" But the only thing it tells us is that they are very easily fooled.
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They have poisonous spurs that can really screw you up.
This also says something about the relative usefulness of a German education vs an American one.