The Sunday Shows Say Goodbye To Lindsey Graham

We watch so you never have to!

Longtime South Carolina Republican Senator Lindsey Graham has died.

Was he a good senator? No.

Was Lindsey Graham a loyal friend? Well … sort of.

Was Lindsey Graham a champion for the Constitution? No.

Was Lindsey Graham at least a decent human being? Also no.

Lindsey Graham was a political remora and insatiable warmonger. He was also an attention-seeking fuckmook, and his favorite platform was the Sunday political shows.

So this week’s post is their (and our) goodbye to Graham.

CNN’s State Of The Union

We begin chronologically, and fittingly, with Donald Trump on CNN’s State Of The Union. Host Jake Tapper adjusted his guest lineup to give time for Lindsey Graham’s last remaining “friend” to call in to the show.

Donald Trump exhibited the level of empathy and grief we’ve all come to expect from him.

TAPPER: The senator was a close ally of yours. He referred to himself as your North Star, the Trump guy in the Senate. What are your thoughts about Lindsey Graham this morning?

TRUMP: Well, it's devastating. I thought he was fine. He called me last night. He just got back from Ukraine. And he had a great trip. He was telling me about the trip. He was pushing very, very hard. You probably know he wanted to do the SAVE America Act. And he was talking about that.

Yep! According to Trump, Graham’s final wish was to pass voter-restricting laws that would help Trump personally retain power. What a coincidence! Truly, it must be kismet that Graham’s totally real final conversation would serendipitously be about the “SAVE America Act.”

Wonkette’s scientifically verified analysis of the veracity of this story.

Tapper went on to reminisce with Trump about Graham’s previous criticisms of Trump, before he shifted to being one of his staunchest toadies allies in Congress. Trump remembered him as tough and nasty, but never one to let a good opportunity to shift blame away from himself, he gave “credit” to Graham in case things don’t work out well on the foreign policy front:

TRUMP: Well, we disagreed a little bit, but, overall, I'm a big Israel person. He was certainly that. I was -- I wanted to see the war with Ukraine end very quickly. I think he was more into keeping it going, frankly. He was -- he was very, very militant having to do with that.

Then he shifted the conversation, like a salesman way behind on his monthly quota and desperate to make a sale, back to what he thinks is important:

TRUMP: Where he was really becoming strong was the SAVE America Act. […] So he was -- he was coming aboard, I think, for the filibuster, terminating the filibuster. But we -- before we did that, he was going to -- he was a strong advocate for SAVE America.

For someone who loathes Alec Baldwin, Trump sure sticks to his Glengarry Glenn Ross lessons.

So much so that he scolded Jake Tapper when he meekly attempted journalism.

TAPPER: The US and Iran have been engaging back and forth in strikes over the last few days and overnight. Are we back at war? And who controls the Strait of Hormuz?

TRUMP: Well, I don't want to -- out of respect for Lindsey, I'm not talking about that.

Tapper tried again but got the same scolding again.

TAPPER: Iran has declared the Strait of Hormuz closed. Is that true, Mr. President?

TRUMP: It’s open as far as we’re concerned. Don’t talk about it. Talk about the reason that you asked me to speak.

But the interview about the loss of Trump’s lapdog ended with Tapper auditioning for the position and rolling over to show his belly for his future Skydance Media overlords in this exchange:

TAPPER: Well, I know you don't want to talk about any other issues out of respect for Lindsey Graham, but we would love to have you back some time, because I do have a lot of other questions for you, sir.

TRUMP: Sure. We will do that. We will do that.

TAPPER: Thank you for calling in.

TRUMP: We're trying to...

TAPPER: Yes?

TRUMP: ... have CNN go on a normal path. And we will do that.

TAPPER: Well, I'm on a normal path right here, sir, and I appreciate your time.

TRUMP: Good. You are.

TAPPER: And thank you for calling in.

TRUMP: OK. Thanks a lot.

TAPPER: Thanks so much.

Jesus, Jake.

NBC’s Meet The Press

NBC originally had Lindsey Graham scheduled to appear on Sunday, as this graphic shows.

NBC and Kristen Welker, had to change their plans, and chose a different yet equally sycophantic route from what CNN did:

How do you replace one old war criminal like Lindsey Graham? You invite TWO in Donald Trump and Bibi Netanyahu!

On Meet The Press, Donald Trump did the same hard sell for the SAVE America Act that he did on CNN, adding a “happy” memory he had of his old pal:

TRUMP: You know, he had some fine moments. His moment on Brett Kavanaugh was one of the classics, I think in the history of the Senate. His moment was literally, I mean, literally, one of the great classics of anyone in the Senate when he defended Brett Kavanaugh so brilliantly. And Brett might not have made it except for that. […] And I think that saved Brett Kavanaugh’s Supreme Court, you know, ascension.

Oops, sorry, we meant infuriating. Both in reminding everyone of the long-lasting effects of Graham’s (and Trump’s) evil on all Americans, and the way Trump talks about it as if it were one of his favorite scenes in a TV show or movie. Although describing Kavanaugh’s Supreme Court confirmation as an “ascension” does weirdly convey the feeling of a credibly accused conservative abuser getting a promotion.

Reminder, this was a selfie he posted celebrating his confirmation of Kavanaugh.

The main lesson that Graham’s death has taught us is that we should strive for a life so that people mourn you when you pass rather than rejoice.

On a personal note, this week, I personally said goodbye to our beloved dog, Harley.

You were and always will be the bestest of girls.

And while writing this, I learned of the passing of legendary Jurassic Park star Sam Neill.

The Lesson: Be a Sam Neill or Harley, never a Lindsey Graham, or whatever Weekend At Bernie’s puppet Mitch McConnell has been reduced to.

About as credible as the real “proof of life” McConnell’s people released.

Have a week.

Follow Michael Mora on Threads, occasionally on Bluesky (and if you are still on Twitter, I’m also HERE).

You can subscribe to Michael Mora’s Substack, The Diasporican Writer, for additional thoughts and topics!