So Tim Ryan Kicked JD Vance's Ass Last Night

And Ohio needs an asskicker, not an asskisser, says Tim Ryan!

There are rumblings out there today that national Democrats really need to stop ignoring the Ohio Senate race, as it's eminently winnable, especially with a Republican candidate as icky and garbage as JD Vance.

The polls are tied even in red Ohio. Democrat Tim Ryan personally raises money far better than Vance, a tall pile of human butt hair with two creepy blue eyes sticking out of it, like if there was an Addams Family character that was just an Aryan pile of butt hair. But Vance has all kinds of national money and Peter Thiel money, and it's putting Ryan at a disadvantage.

“Tim Ryan is running the best Senate race in the country and having to do it all by his lonesome,” said Irene Lin, an Ohio-based Democratic strategist who managed Tom Nelson’s Senate primary campaign in Wisconsin this year. “If we lose this race by a few points, and the Senate majority, blame should squarely fall on the D.C. forces who unfairly wrote off Ohio.”

Based on what happened in last night's debate between Ryan and Vance, we'd be inclined to agree with the other Democratic strategist NBC News quoted, who said it's "malpractice" the way this race is being ignored.

Because truly, Tim Ryan kicked JD Vance's ass.

Indeed, in one of the most memorable lines of the night, Ryan told Vance that what Ohio needs in the Senate was an "ass-kicker," not an "ass-kisser." He was referring to how Donald Trump called Vance a total ass-kisser at a rally in Youngstown, Ohio, last month, saying "JD is kissing my ass, he wants my support so much."

It's eight seconds long, and it is perfect.

“Ryan: I’m for Ohio. I don’t kiss anyone’s ass like him. Ohio needs an ass kicker not an ass kisser”

— Acyn (@Acyn) 1665446259 

And for fun, here is Ryan talking about how JD Vance let Trump take his dignity and then just keeps kissing his ass, mashed up with Trump talking about Vance kissing his ass.

“Spliced the Trump Rally Ass Kiss clip with tonight’s debate”

— Acyn (@Acyn) 1665450491 

And for the full clip, Tim Ryan tweeted it out, because he knew what he had just done.

“Yikes. #OHSenDebate”

— Tim Ryan (@Tim Ryan) 1665446571 

That was just kind of the tone Ryan set for the entire debate.

Ryan smacked the crap out of JD Vance's extremism on abortion, and extremism in general.

Ryan slammed Vance for "running around with Lindsey Graham, who wants a national abortion ban," and "Marjorie Taylor Greene, who is the absolute looniest politician in America." Ryan said he's running to represent "the exhausted majority" in the face of extremists like Vance. It's a really very good sound bite.

“Tim Ryan slams JD Vance for being part of an extremist movement: "You're running around with Lindsey Graham, who wants a national abortion ban. You're running around with Marjorie Taylor Greene, who is the absolute looniest politician in America. This is a dangerous group!"”

— MeidasTouch (@MeidasTouch) 1665444649 

 JD Vance admitted out loud with his mouth that he's for "some kind of minimum national standard" on abortion, by which he meant Lindsey Graham's national abortion ban. Then he lied and said we were talking about "five-month-old babies," which is a hell of a way to describe a second trimester fetus.

So that's a free ad for the Ryan campaign to use.

“Vance on Lindsey Graham’s abortion ban: Some minimal national standard is ok with me”

— Acyn (@Acyn) 1665444068 

More extremism from JD Vance? Here he is trying to explain why he doesn't support codifying marriage equality in law, as he babbles on and on about how it's not about marriage equality, it's about religious liberty and Catholic nuns. Ryan just LOLed at him, saying, "Only JD Vance can say the bill about same-sex marriage isn't about same-sex marriage." And then he just kept reminding voters how out of touch Big Mister Butt Hair is with regular normal people, on abortion, on marriage equality, on everything.

“Tim Ryan: "JD Vance is extreme on these issues. No exceptions for rape or incest... now he says he's not for same sex marriage. He's going right down the line w/the absolute most extremist. The guys who want to ban books... those are the guys you bring into the state to campaign"”

— Aaron Rupar (@Aaron Rupar) 1665444999 

Here's Ryan calling Vance out for raising funds for January 6 attackers, noting that Vance says "out of one side of his mouth that he's pro-cop, and out of the other side he's raising money for the insurrectionists who were beating up the Capitol Police?" Another clip worth a solid minute of your time!

“Whew!! Tim Ryan just obliterated JD Vance for raising money for the legal defense fund for the insurrectionists who beat police officers on January 6.”

— MeidasTouch (@MeidasTouch) 1665445750 

When Ryan wasn't attacking Vance for being an unhinged extremist, he was lobbing zingers at Vance's face about his hypocrisy whining about jobs leaving Youngstown and going to China, considering how "guys like you make money investing in China!"

“J.D. Vance asks Rep. Tim Ryan (D-OH) why his Youngstown congressional district is losing jobs to China. RYAN: "Because guys like you make money investing in China!" Pressed on whether he did that (he did), Vance replies "Not that I know of..."”

— Heartland Signal (@Heartland Signal) 1665446618 

So that's how that went.

Yes, we'd be inclined to agree that Ryan should be getting some of this national Democratic money, so that we can keep trash like JD Vance out of the United States Senate and maybe pick up Rob Portman's seat.

Also Cheri Beasley in North Carolina please.

Because she's kind of awesome too and absolutely can beat Ted Budd.

“No notes.”

— Cheri Beasley (@Cheri Beasley) 1665082471 

More like that please, the end.

[ NBC News ]

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