357 Comments

Ta, Marcie. Pay up, Roodles the Clown.

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$12,000 a month for cigars? Guy must have been chain smoking Cohibas.

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Guarantee the 'official' claim is those expenses for cigars and fountain pens, etc. were for gifts to 'associates' and clients..........receipts please.......I'm SURE you didn't just pocket that money and try to write it off as charitable giving or business expenses........heavens no!!!!!

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$425 a month on “personal care products”? I know good scotch can be expensive, but the hair dye jokes practically write themselves.

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He’s certainly not spending it at the dentist. Have you seen those lowers? [shudders]

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No wonder he looks so bad, that number should have at least two more zeros on it to make him seem evenly passably human.

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"When she was a hospital CEO at the height of COVID, Ryan went to the RNC maskless to sit next to Rudy, and she calls herself “doctor” even though her doctorate is in philosophy from a diploma mill, just to give you a sense of the flavor of nuts she is."

How the hell does someone get to be CEO of a HOSPITAL with a philosophy degree from a diploma mill? Those jobs pay VERY well.

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> which included $7,131 on fountain pens and $12,012 on cigars.

"This week on Hoarders, we are going to make *such* a profit..."

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"Personal care products and services"? I thought he dyed his hair with ink from the fountain pens.

I don't want to know what the services are. We'll probably learn more when Ms. Dunphy's suit gets to court.

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The cult leader coughed up that $340k for a reason, probably a settlement preventing Rudy from suing. Not couch cushions because that implies he is richer than he is.

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$7131 for FOUNTAIN PENS!!!! In a month? What does he do with the damned things? They leak, make a shitty line and plain don't work. JFC!

I'm the pickiest person I know about pens, and get them at $20 a twelve pack. People regularly steal my pens because they are so good. What a fucking idiot.

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I hear ya. Pilot Precise V5 extra fine point. Won't use anything else.

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How do you think he has been dying his hair?

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Parker Pen's Quink never cost that much per bottle!

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He colors his hair with them.

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I don’t want Rudy living in a van down by the river. I want him living in prison cell until he croaks.

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I want Ruby and Shaye PAID!!!!!!

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I hope they’ll get something, though I think it’s unlikely they’ll ever see the full $148 million.

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𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘋𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘥 (𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘦𝘹𝘪𝘴𝘵)

Not only do they exist, but they've been advertising incessantly throughout the NBA and NHL playoffs. With ads starring some dimwitted chick who...I'm not sure who she is or why she exists. Is she a Real Housewife or something?

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I've had a couple of friends who were forced to declare bankruptcy, and none of them have a podcast. However, they did get second jobs to be able to afford food and their mortgage.

America: The Land of Second (and 100th) Chances!

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"It would seem things aren’t going too swell for horny Scotch goblin Rudy Giuliani."

Do not besmirch us horny Scotch gobblins. We are a fine people.

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$400k for yapping on the radio to MAGA knuckleheads??? Wingnut welfare sure pays well!

No wonder the lunacy is spreading: every conspiracy-spouting scammer and grifter on the planet must be targeting the deplorables market.

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He spends *how* much a month on fountain pens? Is that a monthly payment for one really expensive pen, or does he not realize that when you finish sucking all the ink out, you can refill it rather than throw it away and buy a dozen more? Also, I had no idea that there was a World Series of Bad Lawyering. Kudos to you, Rudy, on your three wins.

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I'm guessing the pens were Mont Blanc's finest, engraved with his name and phone number, and handed out to people he thought would send business his way.

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Who on Earth would want to hire him? And to do what? He can’t practice law. I know he was also some kind of tech security consultant for a while even though he could barely open his iPhone. What service could this alcoholic Gollum offer anyone?

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Even better, the "tech security consultant" became known for *butt-dialing reporters*.

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Or it's money laundering.

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Given his "business" partner, this is the most grotesque season of the bachelor ever.

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Just when you think you hate the New York Yankees, you find another reason to fucking hate the New York Fucking Yankees

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I spent the weekend reading a collection of articles by the great Wayne Barrett on Trump and Giuliani's capers. One of them details Rood's dealings with the Bronx Blockheads; in it, Barrett states that Ghouliani was the proud owner of FOUR diamond-encrusted Yankees World Series rings, with his name engraved in each one, with a total value (a couple of decades ago) of $250K.

Wonder what happened to the fourth ring? Did he need to hock it to buy fountain pens?

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Does the mayor of every city with a team that wins the World Series get a ring? Why? What did they do? They sure as hell didn't pitch a no hitter or bat in the winning run in the bottom of the ninth in the 7th game.

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No, in fact, the mayors of those cities do not receive World Series rings, even ones that aren't diamond-encrusted. Barrett checked with several mayors in cities with Series championship teams, and all of them thought the idea was preposterous on its face.

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America's Team and America's Mayor

America eats its young

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Someone threw it into Mount Doom

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Too bad Rudy wasn’t clutching it like a drunken Gollum as it fell into the lava.

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This isn't about THE LAW. This is about the laws protecting mediocre white men.

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I did a bit of googling, and you can buy a Mont Blank for around $400. There are pens that cost thousands, but they are basically jewelery with a nib. Some don't even have a pocket clip.

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the kind of thing you put on your desk to show others how much disposable income you have.

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