U Of Alabama College Democrats Call A Tyrant A Tyrant
Roll tide right up your fuckin' ass, Donald Trump.
With all the devastation he’s caused — with his stupid tariffs and his pig ignorant racism and the rest of his Nazi tendencies — and with the war he’s declared on America’s colleges and universities raging, and with his approval ratings in absolute freefall, Donald Trump was dumb enough to think he’d be wanted and welcome giving the commencement for two of America’s great institutions of higher learning, West Point and the University of Alabama.
Yes, Trump thought it’d be a good idea to stand in front of America’s students — economics majors, say, whose brains haven’t malfunctioned to the point that they can’t understand that a tariff is a tax — and babble incomprehensibly about his grievances, and about how the rest of the world was screwing us, but now we’re respected again, you’ll see. (Everything is projection with him.) Or in front of medical students, who can see what he’s done to funding for cancer research and treating disease at home and for the least of these around the world, he thought he could stand in front of them without any pushback.
Trump was incorrect.
We’ll see what the response from West Point looks like, any opposition will likely be a bit more muted because “military.” But as Rachel Maddow alluded to last night, it is kinda weird that Trump is going to be at West Point considering how he’s currently saying these graduating cadets are supposed to respect a Defense secretary who’s literally unworthy of human respect, and who acts in ways that would get each and every one of them kicked out of the military and prosecuted if it was them.
And then there is Alabama. Underestimate Alabama at your own peril, MAGA mouthbreathers.
In response to Trump’s announcement, the University of Alabama College Democrats released the following statement, which appears to be only the beginning of students’ response to that sack of corpulent dogshit smearing their graduation ceremonies for all time, and which is a master class in HOW TO HAVE A SPINE for any people and institutions who still think they have to cave in the face of the absolute most pathetic and embarrassing two-bit tyrant in human history.
Observe how the young students have a fucking modicum of courage, cowardly law firms and media conglomerates, and see if herein you may find something to inspire you, too, to grow a goddamned dick.
The text:
UACD is shocked and disgusted to learn that our unpopular, divisive, and authoritarian President will be involved in commencement for the graduating class of 2025. This insult will not go unanswered.
The last time the disgraced criminal visited campus, he was able to turn the Alabama-Georgia game, the biggest college football game on our campus in years, into a political sideshow. We cannot allow this to happen with our commencement ceremonies.
For all of his meddling in UA affairs, Donald Trump lost our campus to former Vice President Kamala Harris last semester. UA is not a fascist playground.
The Trump administration kidnapped one of our Ph.D. students for no reason a few weeks ago and is holding him without bond at an ICE black site in Louisiana.
There is no greater insult than this.
Given that the White House has pulled federal funding from colleges and universities across our country, we understand if the Bell administration may be stuck between a rock and a hard place. We simply don't want UA to be turned into a backdrop for MAGA propaganda.
UACD and its partners are actively mobilizing in response to last night's news. We will have more updates whenever possible, and we hope to update everyone in the next few days.
Oh dear God, that’s good!
“Unpopular, divisive and authoritarian.”
“This insult.”
“Disgraced criminal.”
Kamala fucking won Alabama, by which they mean the University of Alabama.
“UA is not a fascist playground.”
And then they lose it on Stupid Hitler thinking he can show his pig face there after he’s just kidnapped one of their beloved students, Alireza Doroudi — and nobody knows why, aside from the obvious truth that the Trump administration is full of white supremacist Nazi terrorists.
“There is no greater insult than this.”
These MAGA redneck pigfucks think they’re gonna be welcome at Alabama, which is a real university, and they’re about to be in for a rude awakening. They think they understand what SEC schools are alike. Maybe they’re hopefully clinging to those stories that come around every so often where some awful antebellum southern fraternity has done some awful Klan-level shit. But they’d do well to remember that SEC schools are, again, real universities with tens of thousands of students, and to recall that all education has a well-known liberal bias, and then determine if they think Trump will be welcome anywhere they won’t literally require the students to suck his shriveled cock.
Like Liberty University or something.
Has he considered Liberty?
He should consider Liberty. Or Hillsdale, that bed of fascist apprenticeship and not really “education” anymore, per se. What about Hillsdale!
He could tell the graduates about his plans to Make America’s Ladies Broodmares Again. It’ll be great. Then they can all sing the “Proud To Be An American” song together while they do the jerking two dicks at one time dance, it’ll be great.
As for the rest of America’s graduating students and the rest of the patriotic Americans, take heart. The spell is breaking. The people are rising up. America will defeat this dipshit crybaby tyrant, just like it’s done all the other times, going back to the Revolutionary War.
And again, if you need any steel for your spine, look at how the Alabama College Democrats did it. Or how Wonkette does it. Or how the gabillions of protesters rising up every single week in thousands of cities and towns are doing it.
Calling that man what he deserves to be called is fun and easy, everybody try it!
In summary and in conclusion, fuck Donald Trump right in his decomposing gourd, the end.
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Now THAT is an Alabama Slammer!
Kudos to this rising Tide of resistance!
Fighting Nazis.
When you realize that waking up is actually a good thing.