We Need To Talk About 'Peace Plans' For Ukraine
ATTN: mainstream media! Here are some things you've missed the past 10 years.
We need to talk about “peace plans” for Ukraine. We need to talk about how that sounds like a really nice thing — give peace a chance! — but it’s not, because the people pushing for it and using that language want to hurt Ukraine and leave it to the whims of its abuser Russia.
We need to talk about what this “peace plan” coded language really means, and how the people saying it have been working on this project for a full decade, yet the mainstream media largely can’t be bothered to figure out what it’s all about.
Yesterday, the belligerent priss felon in the White House let it be leaked that he would be putting a “pause” on all funding supporting Ukraine in its war against Russia, which Russia started fully unprovoked. He would be doing this until that rude boy Ukrainian President Volodomyr Zelenskyy came to his senses and apologized for not treating Dear Leader as God’s chosen best boy on earth, and for not complimenting Vance on how his new Ozempic ass looks in pants now. And he didn’t say thank you. (You know, except for all the millions of times Zelenskyy is always saying thank you to the US and everybody else.)
And of course, the pause is until Zelenskyy agrees to whatever terms of “peace” Trump and the Russians come up with. Zelenskyy just has to show that he’s “ready to go to peace,” National Security Advisor and MAGA asslicker Mike Waltz said on TV Monday night. Babbling Russian propaganda spigot and Alabama Republican Senator Tommy Tuberville said on Newsmax yesterday that Ukraine’s future will be whatever “Putin and President Trump” decide it is, and that Zelenskyy “isn’t even in the game.”
It’s not that Zelenskyy doesn’t want peace. Of course he does. One really good way of achieving that would be for Putin to pull his troops out of the war he started and stop murdering, raping and kidnapping Ukrainian women, babies and children. Zelenskyy said in his address to the nation Monday night, “We need peace — real, fair peace — not endless war. And we need security guarantees.”
Meanwhile, Kremlin spox Dmitry Peskov is positively jizzing himself over these developments. “If it’s true, then this is a decision which could really push the Kyiv regime to a peace process,” he said in response to Trump’s announcement last night.
A peace process. You know, the kind where Russia gets everything it wants and Ukraine gets nothing.
How You Say ‘Peace Plan’ In Way Vladimir Understand?
We bleeted last night on Bluesky (“skeeted” is stupid, “bleeted” is funnier):
This has been going on since loooooong before the end of the Olympics in China in 2022, when Putin barely waited until the togetherness flame was extinguished to cross the border into Ukraine and start mass murdering everyone. Go all the way back to 2014, when Putin invaded Ukraine the first time and successfully occupied and stole Crimea.
If you’ll remember, way back when, President Barack Obama stuck all these sanctions on Russia for its illegal invasion, and during the 2015-16 campaign, getting those sanctions lifted was big talk among the Trump associates who were colluding with Russians to help steal that election. (No collusion? No collusion? Eat my dick, says the Republican-led Senate Intelligence Committee’s report, which was signed off on by a man named Marco Rubio.)
During the 2016 campaign and shortly after, Trump campaign chair Paul Manafort — who you’ll remember was mysteriously chairing the campaign for “free” after doing similar work to install pro-Russian stooge Viktor Yanukovych in power in Ukraine in 2010 — was shopping a “peace plan” for Russia and Ukraine, which would include sanctions relief and letting Russia carve out whatever parts of Ukraine it wanted. (Important context: Putin blamed the United States, and specifically Hillary Clinton, for orchestrating the 2013-14 Euromaidan protests that toppled Yanukovych. Invading and seizing Crimea directly after was his temper tantrum response.)
Manafort lied to Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s investigators about that, specifically about his conversations with his Russian spy buddy Konstantin Kilimnik about the “peace plan.” That plan was to make Eastern Ukraine “autonomous,” in order to set it up for Russia eventually just taking it. Kilimnik was, of course, the same Russian spy Manafort was handing Trump campaign modeling data about the Rust Belt to, to hand over to their oligarch buddy Oleg Deripaska.
In the first year of Trump 1.0, Trump’s former lawyer Michael Cohen met with certain folks — a Russian emigre named Felix Sater and a pro-Russian Ukrainian named Andrii Artemenko — and delivered to the White House a genius “peace plan” for Russia and Ukraine, which would settle how much of Ukraine Russia was allowed to steal.
It’s weird, everybody Trump ever met was constantly lying about the lifting of Russian sanctions, which is the same conversation as the “peace plan” for Ukraine. To bring peace to Ukraine by making sure poor Vladimir Putin felt safe and sound and in possession of all the Ukrainian real estate his heart desired, and with no more of those stinky sanctions he got as punishment for stealing it in the first place!
Michael Flynn lied to the FBI and said he didn’t discuss sanctions with the Russian ambassador. He did, though.
The Russians were up Donald Trump Jr.’s ass in Trump Tower in 2016 about sanctions relief. As Wonkette noted at the time, we are sure that dumbfuck Junior had no idea what the Russian lady was talking about, but Paul Manafort was in the room for that meeting and he sure did.
It was always the sanctions, and the “peace plan.” So many peace plans! It has been the center of this story from the beginning.
As the 2020 election approached, and as it became clear that Joe Biden was probably best positioned to compete for the Democratic nomination, win it, then beat Trump’s ass, Trump became fixated on getting dirt on the Bidens, and deputized Rudy Giuliani to do that for him in Ukraine. And when Zelenskyy wouldn’t play ball and announce made-up investigations into the Bidens in order to help Trump steal that election, he got on the phone with Zelenskyy and started extorting him with the military assistance Ukraine desperately needed to protect itself from Russia. “I would like you to do us a favor, though.”
Trump had such a tantrum over it that he indeed pulled aid that Congress had already appropriated for Ukraine, in order to try to force Zelenskyy to do his will. Otherwise Trump was ready to leave Ukraine to Putin’s whims.
Sound familiar?
That was what led to Donald Trump’s first impeachment, it was so nakedly criminal. And now here we are again, and history’s stupidest criminal is doing it again in everybody’s faces. This time Ukrainian minerals are involved, they’re the precious treat Donald Trump wants to steal. But the outlines are the same. Trump is extorting Zelenskyy for protection, to agree to a “peace” which would be nothing less than a love gift to Putin tied up with a bow.
In many ways this is the culmination of Trump’s entire decade of treason. Trump may have just been babbling when he promised to end the Ukraine war on day one, but this was always where it was going. In 2023, we wrote, after Donald Trump Jr. just blabbed it out loud, that “thanks to Donald Dumbfuck Junior, we know what the plan is. Surprise, it is to ‘peace deal’ Ukraine by cutting off all funding and forcing Ukraine to come to the negotiating table with Russia.”
Junior said then, “Until we say ‘enough is enough,’ no one's coming to the table! Until we say we're not funding this crap anymore, no one has an incentive to negotiate!”
Our 2023 piece continued:
Reminder: “This crap” is that Russia attacked Ukraine unprovoked because Vladimir Putin has delusions in his brain that Ukraine does not exist, and because Putin is consumed with shame over the rotting husk of nothingness Russia has become in the last several decades and dreams of lording over a “Russian world” that does not exist. Much of this is due to his shitty leadership.
In summary and in conclusion, the Trump plan is for America to fuck Ukraine over and “force” it to come to Russia (the country that attacked it) and beg it to stop, giving away whatever sovereign Ukrainian territory or treasure Russia wants in the process.
In other words, everything Putin wanted when he invaded Ukraine unprovoked and started bombing babies.
Here we are. Even Trump’s co-president Elon Musk has been on the “peace plans for Ukraine” bandwagon the past couple years! Surprise, they are exactly the peace plans Vladimir Putin wants.
Oh by the way, what’s this headline about sanctions from just yesterday?
We’ll end by quoting ourselves yet again, also in 2023, about what a real and just peace would actually look like in Ukraine:
There will be no “peace” without Ukraine beating the living shit out of Russia to the point that Russia will never again think of even looking at Ukraine or any other former Soviet satellite or nearby NATO nation funny. (Here's an article about Putin's plan to go after Moldova next. Here's one about his plans to officially steal Belarus.) All else is Russian propaganda dedicated to making you think Russia has some sort of valid opinion here, some kind of legitimate foreign policy aims. Putin wants to conquer and kill in the name of his warped fantasies of Making Russia Great Again.
There is no “peace plan,” Elon Musk. There is no “peace plan,” Donald Trump. There is no “peace plan,” MAGA trash.
You want peace? You help Ukraine win.
Donald Trump is pulling the United States out of that project, placing us on the side of the bad guys. We guess it’s up to Europe and whoever else is left in the world that’s decent.
Slava Ukraini.
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Even before Crimea was annexed, we had sanctions on Russia in the wake of the passage of the Magnitsky act, Magnitsky being a lawyer who was representing U.S. financier Bill Browder. Browder and Magnitsky got on the wrong side of the Kremlin, and Magnitsky was imprisoned, denied medical treatment, and then murdered (beaten to death). That's the kind of regime we're dealing with here. Turning Russia into the good guys is a spectacular piece of truth inversion.