Why Is Every World Leader Laughing At Donald Trump Today?

We've got another hilarious hot mic moment of world leaders making fun of El Dipshit!

World leaders laughing at Donald Trump. screengrab via

It is never not a good time to emphasize just how mocked, derided, beclowned and laughed-at Donald Trump is on the world stage. In his first term, videos of world leaders on hot mics making fun of Trump behind his back were legend. Remember this one?

Good fun.

Well, we got a brand-spankin’ new one! Let us set it up for you.

Know how Trump is always claiming to have ended seven wars, or possibly eight, as he claimed this week? (He has ended no wars.) Well not only has he claimed to have ended seven wars or eight wars (no wars), it’s clear that he doesn’t know how to say any country names (stupid, dementia), and he doesn’t know where countries are (dementia, stupid), and he has no idea who might be fighting, where, or why.

(Because stupid, and also dementia.)

So Trump stands in front of people, and he says things like MANY PEOPLE ARE SAYING I ENDED THE WAR BETWEEN LISTERIA AND ACAT-O-, A-CE-CAT-O, HOW DO YOU SAY IT, LET’S JUST SAY “TYLENOL,” MANY PEOPLE ARE CALLING IT TYLENOL EVER SINCE I STARTED CALLING IT TYLENOL, EVER SINCE I CAME UP WITH THAT WORD, WHICH IS A BEAUTIFUL WORD, MUCH LIKE “GROCERIES.”

And everybody is like … what?

(Except Jake Tapper, he is probably too busy demanding interviews with Joe Biden’s prostate cancer cells.)

Trump has in particular been having trouble with Armenia and Azerbaijan. Which are two hard words and concepts, if you’re five years old, or stupid, or have dementia. Of course, if you’re not those things, you can pretty easily grasp that they’re fucking next to each other, and if you’re not an unfit leader of the free world surrounded by illiterate lunatics and Nazis, you probably have somebody at your disposal to brief you on why they’ve been at fisticuffs all these years. Suffice it to say, that’s not where Trump is.

Here is a clip of Trump explaining on September 18, alongside UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer, that he had recently solved the conflict between ABURRRRR-BI-JOHN and, um, Albania. (He made the same claim on Fox News that week, without totally fucking up “Azerbaijan.”) The clip also features Trump separately claiming, at an event at Mount Vernon, to have ended the war between Cambodia and Armenia. “It was just starting, and it was a bad one!” He added, “Think of that!” as if everybody wasn’t already.

At that event, he bitched and moaned, as he has this week, as he does every week, that he hasn’t gotten the Nobel Peace Prize, which is indeed remarkable, since he is so good at foreign policy he is ending wars between countries he hallucinates in his brain. (Not Russia and Ukraine, though. Or Gaza and Israel, though he released a 20-point grifting plan this week to “end” that war, we guess so he can fulfill his dream of turning Gaza into a casino resort. We’re sure it’ll go off flawlessly.)

Which brings us to today’s hi-larious moment at a meeting of the European Political Community in Copenhagen, featuring Edi Rama, the prime minister of Albania, Ilham Aliyev, the president of A-BURRR-BI-JOHN, and French President Emmanuel Macron, who always seems to be around when people are punching Trump in the dick and laughing about it.

Rama, being funny and charming, tells Macron that he should apologize to both him and Aliyev, for failing to congratulate them on the “peace deal that President Trump made between Albania and Azerbaijan.” And everybody laughed and laughed and laughed. Aliyev really lost it.

Macron said he was sorry. The way Rama said “Yeah” in response to Macron’s apology, fully committing to the bit, you will die.

Rama emphasized that Trump “worked VERY hard” on that peace deal.

At the end of the clip, everybody was still laughing, at the fucking buffoon a small plurality of the American people chose to be their leader, because they are morons.

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Trump has been saying this thing about solving seven wars for a while now. We have no idea who told him he solved the wars, or the specific number, but it’s probably the same person who shows him recycled footage and/or AI videos of “war zones” in Portland and tells him Venezuela is emptying out “insane asylums” and sending the crazy people here to scare him. So … Stephen Miller? And again we ask, if so, is that elder abuse?

He always claims they were “unsolvable” and “unendable.” It is so stupid and pathetic.

We don’t know what is going through his mind when he says these things, what Grandpa Dementia thinks he did, or what year he thinks these things happened. But tons of reporters have fact-checked it and explained that no, this is not a thing that has happened.

By AP’s count, he sorta kinda ended that situation when Israel and Iran were shooting at each other, but it’s not like their conflict is over.

He did not actually end a war between Ethiopia and Egypt, because they are not at war. They have been arguing over a dam. “It would be a gross overstatement to say that these countries are at war,” said Lawrence Haas from the American Foreign Policy Council. “I mean, they’re just not.”

India and Pakistan, who almost went apeshit at each other over Kashmir (again) back in April? Oh yeah, they’re never gonna fight again! But, like, the thing that happened back in April wasn’t a “war,” according to anyone. Also India says that actually India and Pakistan ended that non-war.

Serbia and Kosovo? Uhhhhhhhh, nope. Not at war. Weren’t at war. Sorry, White House.

Rwanda and the Democratic Republic of the Congo? There is still a whole lotta fightin’ goin’ on over there, so nope.

AR-BAY-NEE-A and A-BURR-JE-BURP? Wellllll, yes there is an agreement and yes, it was signed at the White House. But, cautions AP: “But the two countries have yet to sign and ratify the deal.” The New York Times also notes that the thing signed is not actually a peace deal.

And finally, Cambodia and Thailand. Yes, they got into it and then cooled their shit earlier this year, and leaders from both countries are giving Trump credit. Of course who knows how true that is, or whether they — like everyone — know it’s smart to lick his ass, in case you want something from him later. Also, NYT notes that it’s not like any of the underlying issues that caused that to blow up have been solved. And it really never got to the point of “full-blown war.”

Those are the seven wars. Or zero wars.

Depends on whether you count all the non-wars Trump didn’t end as wars he did end.

If you’re conjuring images of Stephen Miller or Karoline Leavitt changing Trump’s diaper and him asking “WHAT DID I DO TODAY?” and them saying “YOU ENDED A WAR BETWEEN GARGLESPIT AND BINGBONG!” you’re probably not far off.

And that is why every world leader is laughing at Donald Trump today.

OPEN THREAD.

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