Will Mike Johnson Still Be Speaker By The End Of This Post? Let's Find Out!

Let's make sure Hakeem Jeffries has the gavel next year.

Hey, it looks like Republican House Speaker Mike Johnson might barely avoid a needless government shutdown. Hooray! Sunday, Johnson and Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer, a responsible adult, agreed on a continuing resolution that would set short-term funding deadlines for March 1 and March 8. The current deadline was January 19, which is Saturday, and this is … later. It’s like the government is going credit card surfing.

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“Because the completion deadlines are upon us,” Johnson said in a statement, “a short continuing resolution is required to complete what House Republicans are working hard to achieve: an end to governance by omnibus, meaningful policy wins, and better stewardship of American tax dollars.”

Johnson seems upbeat and confident, but he still has to convince his caucus-full of crazies not to throw a tantrum. A Republican House speaker is like a parent in the supermarket with small children. There’s just no way to avoid public embarrassment.

House Republicans have a very narrow majority and can’t have everything they want. This simple reality seems to escape the far-right nihilist wing.

Rep. Andy Biggs from Arizona immediately whined, “Enough with the continuing resolutions. We’ve had plenty of time to address funding levels. Congress keeps punting this while our southern border remains a mess and our national debt continues to surge. We are doing the American people a disservice.”

Biggs — the pardon-seeking insurrectionist — performs a regular disservice for the American people with his continued presence in Congress. Republicans are incapable of making a good-faith deal with Democrats about border security, and despite their complaints, Republicans are on record as wanting to keep the border a prominent issue during the upcoming election. Republican Rep. Troy Nehls told CNN earlier this month, “Let me tell you, I'm not willing to do too damn much right now to help a Democrat and to help Joe Biden's approval rating. I will not help the Democrats try to improve this man's dismal approval ratings. I’m not going to do it. Why would I?”

Because you people keep insisting the border’s wide open and the nation’s under active invasion? Because your New Year’s resolution was “don’t be a petty asshole”? Republicans could support a bipartisan border deal and it wouldn’t magically make Biden young, Black, and married to Michelle Obama.

After Johnson presented his plan during a Sunday night conference call, the House Freedom Caucus smacked him in the face on social media:

“The @HouseGOP is planning to pass a short-term spending bill continuing Pelosi levels with Biden policies, to buy time to pass longer-term spending bills at Pelosi levels with Biden policies.

This is what surrender looks like.”

Freshman Republican Rep. Mike Lawler, who’d like to keep his New York seat, tried providing these dummies with a “Schoolhouse Rock” lesson he hoped they’d comprehend.

“When you don’t have the White House and you don’t have control of the Senate, you have to find compromise,” he told CNN’s Manu Raju. “And the failure on the part of some of my colleagues to recognize this and continually try to undermine the majority, it’s getting old. ... They gave up a lot of the leverage when they removed Speaker McCarthy from office. … You don’t just stomp your feet and shut the government down to get your way.”

Rep. Dan Crenshaw even tried appealing to the hard-Right’s worse natures: Just pass the continuing resolution now and live to inflict evil another day.

“We have two possible leverage points to get border security: our own budget, or Ukraine aid,” Crenshaw told Politico. “You’d rather hold hostage our own troops’ pay? Or hold hostage Ukraine aid?”

Predictably, Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene threatened to shoot the hostage and said she’d trigger the motion to vacate against Johnson if Ukraine aid is part of any larger border deal. There’s also the very likely prospect that Johnson can only pass this deal with significant Democratic support. Looks like the speaker is damned from all possible directions.

PREVIOUSLY:

Hey, Wait, So Mike Johnson's First Few Months As House Speaker Might've Been His Last Few Months?

2023, The Year Congress Did Jack Shit

Tricksy House Speaker (?) Mike Johnson (??) Might Avoid Government Shutdown If His Own Caucus Lets Him

[Politico / CNN / Business Insider]

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