Wonkette War On Christmas Comes Earlier Every Year!

*Etsy* beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Okay, friends, Wonkers, and countrymen, strap in, we got FORTY-SIX Wonkers’ etsys for you to shop till you are drop! Remember, it is Buy Nothing Friday Except for These Handmade and/or Refurbished/Reduced/Reused/Recycled Vintages From All Our Friends. And of course you’d never forget the Wonkette Bazaar!

Let’s go!

Your friend Leah has super-cute quilted bags and dog bandannas and whatnots, and some of them are rainbow for gay! (Bird and Trophy)

Your friend Sue makes bookmarks out of postage stamps! (Unhinged Artworks)

Your friend Tim’s son makes darling little burners for the frankincense and the myrrh! I bought this for Shy last year, he should burn some right now! (Montana Meadowlark)

Your friend Ziggywiggy makes magnets with her cats and also her art photos! (Ziggy’s sub)

Your friend Nicole Sandler from Air America (remember? Of course you do!) makes pet portraits, stained glass, and refurbished vintages! (Corona Surprises) And here’s her radio on the internet site, while we’re at it! (Nicole Sandler)

Time to refresh my potholders, as I do every year! (Needs more stabby kittens please!) (Irreverant Housewife)

Your friend NinaK makes lovely beaded bracelets, some with rosary accoutrements still attached. You could look like early ‘80s Madonna! (NinaK)

Your friend Anne makes beautiful stationery per your instruction! Have you ever sent me money and got a thank you card back? Anne made those! (Pictrix Design)

Your friend Gwyn makes beautiful earrings and glass bead necklaces! (Gwyn Pearce)

Your friend Sam makes hilarious bumper stickers advising you to horn if you are honky, and other advice too! (Stick It Like This)

Your friend Sydney used to have happy Kamala warrior swag and now she has ANGRY ELECTION SWAG, you will like it and should buy it! (Swag the Vote)

Your friend Michelle has so many embroideries and eyeball jewels! (Ms. Fledermaus)

Your friend Leslie has more beaded coil bracelets! And 90 percent goes to small local animal rescues! (Beading Divas)

Your friend Jena makes sassy wearables for the discerning woman! Also magnets and cups and whatnots as well! (Buttons and Bows)

Your friend Kelly makes embroidery and needlepoint kits and they are adorable! (Punchy Stuff)

Your friend Missy makes sexy tough comic book ladies on tote bags and all kinds of items, and they are WHOO-HOO, I love these a lot! (Missyverse)

Your friend Annie makes beaded earrings, and both the menorah and the watermelon drop earrings are amaaaaazing. They might not be there anymore when you go shopping, because I might have just bought one or both! (Annie’s Blessed Bead)

Your friend Shawn sells Midcentury Modern Christmas trees, you could buy them, they are spensive! (ModShawn)

Your friend Skye designed these Rooftops of America mountain tees and sweatshirts and mugs and things! (Rooftops of America)

Your friend Weston made you these poems! (Lulu)

Your friend Cindy makes these trivets and fruit bowls and beautiful things, BRB spending too much money! (Bowls With Holes)

Your friend Joseph makes things with sweet and adorable bats doing all kinds of activities! (Zowghi Designs)

Your friend Caroline upcycles the vintages! (Revival Reloved)

Your friend Lisa’s sister makes holy shit, click through and see these fiber art bug masks and wrestling masks and oh my god. (Buffalo Hats)

Your friend Kennedy makes amazing ceramics out of horsehair and such! (Studio Kennedy)

Your friend Tina sells the vintages and keeps them out of the landfills, and she made you a 20 percent off with WONKETTE20 ! (Camel City Vintage)

Your friend Chopsusie makes mixed media and collage! (Sue Schreibe Fine Art)

Your friend Luna will read your Tarot, with a special gratitude special of three cards for $10! That is ever so much better than the lady who charged the women friends $500 to tell them they sucked in Wine Country, an Amy Poehler movie I very enjoyed! (Luna)

Your friend Gail sells beautiful vintage crystal and cetera! (DragonflyGifts)

Your friend Tim’s sister sells these slipper kits, they are so effin cute! (Joes Toes)

Your friend Marc makes these slick clocks, they are gorgeous! Oh whoops I bought one! (MarcsTechArt)

Your friend Janet’s friend Jessica makes jewelry and some of them look like very elegant squids. Damn those are pretty Janet’s friend Jessica! (Ajar Creates)

Your friend Bonnie has Christmas tees! (Gurfhood Tees)

Your friend J has necklaces and earrings and oh my god they are gorgeous! (Black Swift Craft)

Your friend Janine and her husband hand-print tees and punk rock patches and such. LOL I bought the DRUGS shirt, it will look great on my good son! (Hiss and Hearse Crypt) They also do the vintages, click click click! (Kitchen Merch Table)

Your friend Daniel’s wife makes with the Celtic jewelry! Celt celt celt! (Celtic Mink)

Your friend Christine makes offensive holiday cards for offending people you love! They are so funny. Oooh, she’s got a sale on now too! (Spacepig Press)

Your friend Amanda makes nerdy neurology brain pun stickers and like that! (Pebble Twig Shop)

Your friend Michele makes exquisite science-inspired fine arts, some of which she turns into silk scarves and ties! (Artologica)

Your friend Gay will tie-dye you all your hippie needs! (Aspen GEM)

Your friend MR Dimond makes you mystery novels! (MR Dimond)

Your friend Mary makes Great Illustrated Classics ebook reader covers! (Rehash)

Your friend DynaMoe makes adorable keychains and patches and cards! (Nobody’s Sweetheart)

Your friend Emily is a planetary geologist and space science journalist, and she would like to sell you some nerdy planet gem sets and rainbow solar spectrum jewelry, and it is freaking awesome! (Elakdawalla)

This has been the Wonkette Buy Nothing Day Except for Whatever I Said Up Top, the Handmade and the Refurbished Et Ceteras. Check back later for cocktail, and we love you.