You missed one of my favorite Johnson statements, when he proudly proclaimed that this 21st Century 2nd in line to the Presidency consults the fucking bible (not a direct quote) for his "world view". WTF!!
Well to be fair, the Democrats were always better at dealing with the deficit than the Republicans at any and all times. It's just shitty that the Democrats have to clean up that mess after the Republicans shat the bed, deficit and debt wise.
It's about military guys who work out hard....with rocks. And have rock hard abs. I download a lot of their material for visual aids, you know? For in-person briefings. And de-briefings, in my office. In private. Because it's a matter of national security. or insecurity, to be more specific.
I'd wonder if there would be results for naked guys shooting guns. Hopefully it'd be mainly muscle guys shooting guns while naked, but....considering the health of the average red state guy.....not so much. Also I'd think there'd be a bigger overlap in the Venn diagram of the viewers for both groups than you'd expect. Which I'm fine with, but I just don't like the hypocrisy.
If a middle-aged man like Mike Johnson can't control his porn addiction he's got some serious issues. However I suspect that the nanny app he talks about is really to control his teen-age son's porn addiction. And Mike just made it reciprocal to disguise his monitoring of his son.
Frederick Winslow Taylor, the "Father of Scientific management," when he was a young man, and compulsive masturbatory wizard, invented a series of harnesses to prevent himself from masturbating when he went to bed in the evening. Save this for the next time the time&motion study priest visits.
Yeah and also, Biden would be president up until January 20th (and beyond pending re-election). He has total authority over the military itself. I mean, Trump didn't even like the job. he only liked hearing his name being repeated nonstop on national TV and cable. He was only livid that it was in connection with bad news. That's why he kept firing people, none of them could make him look good. (Nevermind that they had shitty politics and policies.)
Now he's only running to escape legal consequences because he can hide out in the White house. But even then, that's only 4 more years. After that, then what? Republican politicians don't want him hanging any longer because they think it's their turn to be president. But at the same time, they desperately need his supporters.
I actually met a young woman a few days ago who had "baby fundie voice," like Mi Johnson's wife. Evangelicals teach young women to perpetually talk, and act, like prepubescent girls. When grown women talk like 7 year old girls, it is weird and creepy.
The young woman I met also had that cult like behavior of having a smile plastered on her face at all times. I genuinely felt bad for her, because it was obvious she was brainwashed.
If Trump gets elected, these are the people who are going to be our "leaders" - weird, fake ass, Christians, and KonstiTooshunal originaListS" who have no idea what the Bible or the Constitution say, or do.
I got a definite cult vibe from her. The fake smile, the overly cheerfulness, and the little girl voice made her sound a lot like Michelle Duggar or Mike Johnson's wife. It might be possible that both things are possible - these women are trained to remain girlish, AND they have some sort of trauma (like being in an Evangelical cult).
The only persuasive argument in favor of "God is fixin’ to do something very bad to" America is that God allowed shitheels like this guy to occupy a position of power.
I would have to "agree" with him about "God fixin' to do something very bad to America" if by that he means things like floods and fires and extreme weather events. Only we call it climate change and that we humans have done it to ourselves.
the problem is that it doesn't matter who is the victim--whether it's a fundie church that got struck by lightning (god is mad about the gayz) or a gay bar that got struck by lightning (god is mad about the gayz), it always somehow plays into how they need things to work. who needs logic?
There was a megachurch north of Cincinnati beside I-75 with a giant, papier-mache over wood frame Jesus from the chest up with his arms upraised everyone referred to as "Touchdown Jesus." Across the freeway from it was a Lion's Den Adult Book Store.
There was a huge electrical storm with a lightning strike in that particular area. Guess what was still standing the next morning.
God already did do something bad to America - trump's election in 2016. If he wins this year, God will clearly have spoken again - even worse bad stuff for America.
How much you wanna bet Covenant Eyes wasn’t about Mike and little Johnson spotting each other’s limp softies, but big Mike using it to control his teenage son during the “boner years,” when teens need the most boner supervision. You just know Mike and Mrs. Mike had a very somber discussion about how the devil was tempting their sinless boy with the devil’s boobies, and they simply HAD to act (spy) to know if little Johnson’s brain was filled with hormones and sending unsavory arousal messages to his crotch. And they thought Millennials couldn’t figure out a way around that, like with the counter-creepo-parent software program “Eyes Off My Junk.” Silly Johnsons.
I think you are exactly right. It is totally the sort of thing fundie parents would do. The whole being his father's accountability partner could have just been to keep him from feeling resentment over being spied upon by making him feel more grown up and trusted by his parents (he could "spy" on his dad -- how grown up is that?). Fundie children are used to being spied on by their parents -- there is never any expectation of privacy, so the boys might never question such an arrangement. On the other hand, as you say, they might find ways around it.
The way evangelicals feel about lust and sexual desire being deadly sins and the devil’s temptations, it’s no wonder conservatives treat women like crap. They are jezebels, of course, and if they weren’t always trying to tempt helpless men, the men wouldn’t have to sin.
That's why Muslim extremists want women covered from head to toe - to prevent them from lusting after women. Christ, get a grip you fucking religious morons of all stripes and delusions - if you can't be trusted to look at women, then just avert your eyes.
Jesus literally said that if your eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away (Matthew 18:9). Usually interpreted as; if an external force is tempting you to Bad Stuff, it's YOUR problem to deal with - you don't get to put all the blame on the external force.
Religious extremists of all stamps loooooove to preach about how women are the Evil Temptresses that tempt poor, innocent men beyond their strength. No one ever points out that that's not *just* a misogynistic cop-out, it's also pretty insulting to men.
What, these Mighty Prayer Warriors are literally helpless if someone flashes a boob at them? They're so helpless against their bestial instincts that they can't handle seeing a woman's FACE? JFC, surely that's a description of fucking animals, not sentient human men. Not according to the fundies!
An Australian religious leader once caused mayhem by blaming women's sluttiness for SA, saying that if you put out a plate of meat you can't be surprised if cats eat it. People were rightly outraged he was describing women as meat - but no one pointed out he was describing men as stray cats.
EXACTLY! If you can't handle seeing a woman in public who's wearing a pair of shorts or a short skirt, that's YOUR fucking problem. Don't blame women for your lack of self control.
My theory is that conservative men vilify women for tempting them not merely for the temptation alone, but the frustration of 99% of those women being inaccessible to them and out of their reach. They can’t have it, so they feel anger that it even exists.
The King James translation of Latin translations of Greek translations of Aramaic translations of various fan fiction stories of a super powered and very jealous boyfriend to a chosen people never got translated into a comic book...for good reason.
Because who is going to read a comic where spandex clad versions of the Queen of Sheba or Marvelous Mary Magdalene or Head Chopping Judith do daring deeds and inspire the rest of us? It doesn't seem like the kind of comic that has mass appeal.
They have been translated, however, into cinematic Bible Epics. from the silent era "The Ten Commandments" all the way to "The Greatest Story Ever Told".
Well, there is R Crumb's version of the Book of Genesis. I'd love to see the Song of Solomon produced as a porn flick. The exploding fundie heads would be so awesome.
I am 68 years old. By law no one may attain that age in the US and not have had a chick tract foisted upon them at work or in the parking lot of the grocery store or by a relative who needs mental health counseling.
But they do not qualify as COMICS despite the lake of fire and the Big Guy with the glowing light bulb head. (technically required to avoid the "graven image" prohibition). Chick tracts fail the COMICS test: no spandex tights, no heroics, no fun, no ads for x-ray glasses.
Nobody deserves this award more. Congratulations, “Mike” “Johnson.”
You missed one of my favorite Johnson statements, when he proudly proclaimed that this 21st Century 2nd in line to the Presidency consults the fucking bible (not a direct quote) for his "world view". WTF!!
Third, right? The VP is the 2nd in the line. Does the line to the presidency start with the president?
OT but Paul Krugman is crying "deficit! Deficit! in the gray lady. Get ready, poors! Sacrifices must be made!
Well to be fair, the Democrats were always better at dealing with the deficit than the Republicans at any and all times. It's just shitty that the Democrats have to clean up that mess after the Republicans shat the bed, deficit and debt wise.
Enough to make you miss David Vitter…
"Dad, i just checked the Covenant Eyes app on my phone. What's "Rock Hard Military Dudes?""
"That's research for work son. I'm on the uh...military committee."
It's about military guys who work out hard....with rocks. And have rock hard abs. I download a lot of their material for visual aids, you know? For in-person briefings. And de-briefings, in my office. In private. Because it's a matter of national security. or insecurity, to be more specific.
"Dad, why are you on Pornhub so much?"
"Son why are you on xHamster so much?"
I checked. Pornhub has ample results for "naked girls shooting guns".
A plethora of videos.
I'd wonder if there would be results for naked guys shooting guns. Hopefully it'd be mainly muscle guys shooting guns while naked, but....considering the health of the average red state guy.....not so much. Also I'd think there'd be a bigger overlap in the Venn diagram of the viewers for both groups than you'd expect. Which I'm fine with, but I just don't like the hypocrisy.
Went on xHamster and was so disappointed by the complete lack of cute hamster videos. XP
(I'm not sure I want to know, _what_ xhamster specializes in)
I'll bet my paycheck that Mike has some dark shit playing in his brain, and possibly his hard drive.
Possibly in his asshole. It would be irresponsible not to speculate.
Slipped? Fell? The Lord does work in mysterious ways.
Dark shit like underage-boy rape. Yes, I said it. That's probably not the worst of it either.
After they track down exactly what he does with his money, and I mean 𝐞𝐱𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲, they might want to take a look at the crawlspaces.
If a middle-aged man like Mike Johnson can't control his porn addiction he's got some serious issues. However I suspect that the nanny app he talks about is really to control his teen-age son's porn addiction. And Mike just made it reciprocal to disguise his monitoring of his son.
While my porn addiction is formidable, I have no problem whipping my phone's ass. Pick your battles.
Or keep the kid from looking in the first place. That's what I assumed too.
Frederick Winslow Taylor, the "Father of Scientific management," when he was a young man, and compulsive masturbatory wizard, invented a series of harnesses to prevent himself from masturbating when he went to bed in the evening. Save this for the next time the time&motion study priest visits.
McKinsey and gang took compulsive masturbation and made it into a power point slide deck because that's all they sell for consulting "services."
I say Tuberville's anti abortion schtick was a cover. What they really wanted was to keep Biden appointees out of the military cuz military coup.
Yeah and also, Biden would be president up until January 20th (and beyond pending re-election). He has total authority over the military itself. I mean, Trump didn't even like the job. he only liked hearing his name being repeated nonstop on national TV and cable. He was only livid that it was in connection with bad news. That's why he kept firing people, none of them could make him look good. (Nevermind that they had shitty politics and policies.)
Now he's only running to escape legal consequences because he can hide out in the White house. But even then, that's only 4 more years. After that, then what? Republican politicians don't want him hanging any longer because they think it's their turn to be president. But at the same time, they desperately need his supporters.
When an entire political party paints itself into a corner.
Bad timing. They couldn't keep that up for two years. Obviously.
I actually met a young woman a few days ago who had "baby fundie voice," like Mi Johnson's wife. Evangelicals teach young women to perpetually talk, and act, like prepubescent girls. When grown women talk like 7 year old girls, it is weird and creepy.
The young woman I met also had that cult like behavior of having a smile plastered on her face at all times. I genuinely felt bad for her, because it was obvious she was brainwashed.
If Trump gets elected, these are the people who are going to be our "leaders" - weird, fake ass, Christians, and KonstiTooshunal originaListS" who have no idea what the Bible or the Constitution say, or do.
I'm not sure I even could talk that high. Afab I might be, but I'm a low alto.
I didn't understand how she did it. It was so unnatural.
That little girl voice thing is also a common trauma response indicating the age that the trauma was experienced. Often sexual trauma. Just saying.
I got a definite cult vibe from her. The fake smile, the overly cheerfulness, and the little girl voice made her sound a lot like Michelle Duggar or Mike Johnson's wife. It might be possible that both things are possible - these women are trained to remain girlish, AND they have some sort of trauma (like being in an Evangelical cult).
The only persuasive argument in favor of "God is fixin’ to do something very bad to" America is that God allowed shitheels like this guy to occupy a position of power.
I would have to "agree" with him about "God fixin' to do something very bad to America" if by that he means things like floods and fires and extreme weather events. Only we call it climate change and that we humans have done it to ourselves.
the problem is that it doesn't matter who is the victim--whether it's a fundie church that got struck by lightning (god is mad about the gayz) or a gay bar that got struck by lightning (god is mad about the gayz), it always somehow plays into how they need things to work. who needs logic?
There was a megachurch north of Cincinnati beside I-75 with a giant, papier-mache over wood frame Jesus from the chest up with his arms upraised everyone referred to as "Touchdown Jesus." Across the freeway from it was a Lion's Den Adult Book Store.
There was a huge electrical storm with a lightning strike in that particular area. Guess what was still standing the next morning.
Hint: TD Jesus was never replaced.
well. that just proves once again that god hates gayz
Seems to me that the deity has lousy aim much of the time. But there's little anyone can do about that.
true enough
Trump may get elected in 2024, that's going to prove that God is doing bad stuff to America.
Those aren't Betty Davis eyes, right?
*Kim Carnes considers commenting, shrugs, and has a Bloody Mary from the Wonkette Bar instead*
God already did do something bad to America - trump's election in 2016. If he wins this year, God will clearly have spoken again - even worse bad stuff for America.
He won't win. Dark Brandon will win!
Agreed. I am just pointing out that Maga Mike is wrong about what's bad for America and wrong about what's good for America.
How much you wanna bet Covenant Eyes wasn’t about Mike and little Johnson spotting each other’s limp softies, but big Mike using it to control his teenage son during the “boner years,” when teens need the most boner supervision. You just know Mike and Mrs. Mike had a very somber discussion about how the devil was tempting their sinless boy with the devil’s boobies, and they simply HAD to act (spy) to know if little Johnson’s brain was filled with hormones and sending unsavory arousal messages to his crotch. And they thought Millennials couldn’t figure out a way around that, like with the counter-creepo-parent software program “Eyes Off My Junk.” Silly Johnsons.
I think you are exactly right. It is totally the sort of thing fundie parents would do. The whole being his father's accountability partner could have just been to keep him from feeling resentment over being spied upon by making him feel more grown up and trusted by his parents (he could "spy" on his dad -- how grown up is that?). Fundie children are used to being spied on by their parents -- there is never any expectation of privacy, so the boys might never question such an arrangement. On the other hand, as you say, they might find ways around it.
I'm confused. Does Jeebus hate boners?
The way evangelicals feel about lust and sexual desire being deadly sins and the devil’s temptations, it’s no wonder conservatives treat women like crap. They are jezebels, of course, and if they weren’t always trying to tempt helpless men, the men wouldn’t have to sin.
That's why Muslim extremists want women covered from head to toe - to prevent them from lusting after women. Christ, get a grip you fucking religious morons of all stripes and delusions - if you can't be trusted to look at women, then just avert your eyes.
Jesus literally said that if your eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away (Matthew 18:9). Usually interpreted as; if an external force is tempting you to Bad Stuff, it's YOUR problem to deal with - you don't get to put all the blame on the external force.
Religious extremists of all stamps loooooove to preach about how women are the Evil Temptresses that tempt poor, innocent men beyond their strength. No one ever points out that that's not *just* a misogynistic cop-out, it's also pretty insulting to men.
What, these Mighty Prayer Warriors are literally helpless if someone flashes a boob at them? They're so helpless against their bestial instincts that they can't handle seeing a woman's FACE? JFC, surely that's a description of fucking animals, not sentient human men. Not according to the fundies!
An Australian religious leader once caused mayhem by blaming women's sluttiness for SA, saying that if you put out a plate of meat you can't be surprised if cats eat it. People were rightly outraged he was describing women as meat - but no one pointed out he was describing men as stray cats.
Patriarchy is fucking wild.
Flash a scantily clad ankle!!
EXACTLY! If you can't handle seeing a woman in public who's wearing a pair of shorts or a short skirt, that's YOUR fucking problem. Don't blame women for your lack of self control.
we could save a lot of gabardine if men would just wear eye patches; women could wear whatever they want instead of a giant bedspread.
EXACTLY! What kind of person can't control themselves in public if they see a flash of skin? So delicate, much snowflake!
My theory is that conservative men vilify women for tempting them not merely for the temptation alone, but the frustration of 99% of those women being inaccessible to them and out of their reach. They can’t have it, so they feel anger that it even exists.
Scary fuckin world. Religion just might be a real problem in many ways.
Yeah, there's a reason the Mideast is the least stable region in the world.
Yeah, his dad didn't allow him to have one either, so now he wants to make others suffer the same.
The King James translation of Latin translations of Greek translations of Aramaic translations of various fan fiction stories of a super powered and very jealous boyfriend to a chosen people never got translated into a comic book...for good reason.
Because who is going to read a comic where spandex clad versions of the Queen of Sheba or Marvelous Mary Magdalene or Head Chopping Judith do daring deeds and inspire the rest of us? It doesn't seem like the kind of comic that has mass appeal.
But it does appeal to me.
They have been translated, however, into cinematic Bible Epics. from the silent era "The Ten Commandments" all the way to "The Greatest Story Ever Told".
Well, there is R Crumb's version of the Book of Genesis. I'd love to see the Song of Solomon produced as a porn flick. The exploding fundie heads would be so awesome.
Have you somehow missed out on Chick Tracts?
I am 68 years old. By law no one may attain that age in the US and not have had a chick tract foisted upon them at work or in the parking lot of the grocery store or by a relative who needs mental health counseling.
But they do not qualify as COMICS despite the lake of fire and the Big Guy with the glowing light bulb head. (technically required to avoid the "graven image" prohibition). Chick tracts fail the COMICS test: no spandex tights, no heroics, no fun, no ads for x-ray glasses.