Billary Tapes, Get Your Billary Tapes!
So when are Trump, Melania, Lutnick, and RFK Jr. sitting down for the Committee?
Do you need a distraction from war, ICE crimes, and the price of The Groceries? Step on up for the entire nine-plus hours of Hillary and Bill Clinton getting individually grilled by the various conspiracy theorists, high-school dropouts, and pedo-enabling chucklefucks on the House Oversight Committee! Their desperate and repetitive questions will surely make the faithful rubes forget all about Donald John Trump’s thousands of appearances and the child-rape accusations the FBI found credible in the files that happened to get disappeared. Or maybe not! But there were some fascinating moments!
Watch em all if you still miss those two. Oh Hillz, what we could have had! She never had Bill’s gift for schmooze, because nobody does, and always came off as the tougher customer. Her sharpness shoulda coulda woulda been an asset, but toxic masculinity ruined the party again.
And Hillary Clinton has long claimed she doesn’t recall ever meeting Jeffrey Epstein in person, yet somehow the clowns on the Oversight Committee managed to subject her to four hours of questioning anyway, not including the break when the deposition was paused because grandmother of the year Lauren Boebert was taking creepshots and sending them to Benny Johnson to post online. And didn’t get in any fucking trouble for it either, Chair and Rep. James Comer said he reminded members of the rules.
Anyway at about 1:19:00 up there, or below, you can watch Hillary give those assholes the what-for. “I am done with this if you guys are doing this, I’m done. If you guys are doing that, I am done. You can hold me in contempt until the cows come home. This is just typical behavior. We will go off the record. Oh, for heaven.”
And give yourself a prize if you guessed that it was also vapin’ meemaw / Kid Rock’s maybe one-time girlfriend Las Beetlebobas who was asking dumbshit questions about Pizzagate.
Enjoy above or at the 3:50:00 mark: “In past public statements, um, as in 2017 speeches and interviews, you described Pizzagate as a baseless conspiracy theory alleging you and others ran a child sex ring from a Washington pizzary … pizzeria! basement. Have you reviewed any 2025 or 2026 Epstein files that you think relate to those specific 2016 claims regarding the Podesta emails, Comet Ping Pong, pizza used as code possibly?”
I’m sorry, pardon? And yow, the woman can barely read. Though she can at least do that, so way to go, Colorado GED program?
LAWYER: You’re asking her about whether she’s reviewed emails in files which relate to the wacky Pizzagate scam?
HILLARY: Pizzagate was totally made up. It was an outrageous allegation that ended up hurting a number of people, that caused a deranged young man to show up with his assault rifle and shoot up a local pizzeria. I can’t believe you’re even referencing it.
And Hillary was not having it with Nancy fucking Mace. How rich, that wackjob Mace trying to tie Hillary Clinton to Jeffrey Epstein via Trump’s Treasury Secretary Howard Lutnick. Maybe somebody ought to be checking out Howard Lutnick’s financial record and asking him more questions about what he saw on his Lolita Island kiddie picnic, and during his years of being in business with Epstein, huh? Huh?
And your gal’s got sass.
And then there was Bill. His hands all shaky. Fuck them for doing this to him!
And the shame of Kentucky, James Comer, had claimed last week that Bill Clinton exonerated Donald John Trump, but hardly! At around 1:57:00-ish he recounts the only conversation he ever had with Trump about Epstein, and in retrospect it’s a damn weird one. It took place course-side at a charity golf tournament, which would have been this one in 2009.
BILL CLINTON: And he somehow knew I had flown in Jeffrey Epstein’s aircraft. And he said, “You know, we had some great times together over the years, but we fell out all because of a real estate deal.” And he said, “I’m sorry it happened.”
Trump “somehow knew,” how interesting, long after they officially broke up. And funny how unprompted Trump offered up that version of the breakup, which Trump himself later contradicted, claiming that he actually fell out with Epstein when he learned he was recruiting employees, plural, from the Mar-a-Lago spa. It’s kind of like as Trump’s brain falls apart, he’s having a harder time keeping his stories straight.
Well, now that that is over with, maybe we can move on. To, say, the feds under Trump 1.0 pressuring states to shut down Epstein investigations at the state level five days after he died, including in New Mexico.
To believing the victims! Well, don’t hold your breath. Last word to Republican Rep. Thomas Massie, who’s seen enough.
Haven’t we all! And as much as Trump, Melania, and Lutnick wish it so, these files aren’t going away. Because some people still consider child rape a big deal!
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I kept hoping the Clintons would answer each question by starting with "In reference to Donald Trump and his best friend, Jeffrey Epstein..."
So they can’t testify publically, but it’s ok we’ll just leak their testimony regardless because we need to have Hilary reacting to bobo asking about pizzagate.
I’d still vote for her again today. Arguably the best Clinton option.