Concrete Jungle Where Jail's Made Of! Tabs, Thurs., Sept. 26, 2024

NYC Mayor Eric Adams, go to jail! Morning news roundup!

Tabs gif by your friend Martini Glambassador!

New York City Mayor Eric Adams, a putative Democrat, has been indicted. So I guess Sara Benincasa’s gonna have to reframe the post on his administration’s corruption she wrote for me yesterday that I had scheduled for first (non-tabs) post this morning, and which Wonkette was woefully late to the game on! I have no idea why all my lefty New York friends were so mad at Bill de Blasio the whole time he was in office as an actual socialist. Did they not remember what other New York City mayors are like? Everybody is calling on Adams to resign, which he will never never never never ever ever do because he is a Trumpian narcissist, but if he were to, I need y’all to google images of Jumaane Williams, the public advocate who would become acting mayor. Are you KIDDING ME? COME ON! (CNN)

No government shutdown until Christmas — when you know the Republican House is going to force the government out of business because they’re going to be SO MAD about the election, which they will have lost. I say we ignore it then too! (CNN)

Ron Wyden and the Senate Finance Committee are investigating Jared Kushner’s skeeeetchyyyy bullllshittttt “hedge fund,” which has taken hundreds in million in fees from Qatar, the Saudis, the UAE, some Taiwan douche, and a fifth investor they decline to name, while returning not a cent of profit! That waxen little cadaver doll is very mad that you would think there’s anything untoward, even at all. (Gift link New York Times)

Twelve completely fictional stories Trump has told lately and it doesn’t even include the EATING CATS AND DOGS or the post-birth abortions! (Daniel Dale at CNN)

MSNBC’s Hayes Brown is trying all our last nerves over on Bluesky (I do very very very little twitter anymore) talking about a split in the House/Senate for the tied presidential Electoral College. Do not even stress about it, this is for hypothetical interestingnesses only. Anyway, the last time the Senate elected a vice president from the president’s opposite party was 1836 and it was, as Brown describes it, “wild” understatement of today !!! (Senate)

This poor oppressed law professor, Amy Wax, being oppressed for her lawful white supremacist speech O.O O.O O.O, I mean O.O O.O O.O (SARCASTIC). (Inquirer/ more to the point at Indignity)

Pope Francis excommunicated a bunch of rightwing Catholic cultists in South America, up to and including an archbishop. But it was for sadism and hacking and evicting peasants on behalf of real estate developers — some real shocking shit — so we probably can’t expect him to excommunicate normal weirdo rightwingers like Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, and all the other converts to Opus Dei-style Catholicism anytime soon :( (AP)

More women are facing criminal charges now for miscarrying than before Dobbs overturned Roe v. Wade. Yes more instead of at all, because prosecutors everywhere, even in places like California, have been trying to criminalize bad pregnancy outcomes a long time. (AP)

Heavy on the AP today, that will teach me to open their afternoon email roundup, but: These police chiefs are yelling and screaming for training on dealing with people in medical situations/freakouts, and good lord, the case studies on why they need to be screaming about it. (AP)

The entire bullshit that red state As’G are swallowing from Britain’s dumbfuck Cass Review in order to threaten the American Association of Pediatrics about endorsing gender-affirming care. (Erin in the Morning)

The Las Vegas Strip is now 100 percent unionized, culinarily. 100 emoji! (KTNV)

Sorry, I’m absolutely not believing this argument that AI, with a projected 15x increase in demand for electricity, is going to be a boon for clean energy. Does not pass the smell test, Heatmap. Not buying. AI is terrible, useless, literally dangerous, and JESUS WHAT THE FUCK.

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Today (Thursday) is my last day at work before we fly to Reno and Lake Tahoe. (I’ll have tomorrow’s tabs for you and then Evan will actually do the ones for Monday morning! Which will be the first Sunday I’ve taken off in … ??? No, smart alecks, the Sundays before whichever Monday national holidays don’t count, because then I end up working the Monday national holiday instead!) This has been to whinebrag about how hard I work for you but I BURIED THE FUCKING LEDE which is that we are flying out for the wedding of your comrades Callyson and Spotts, and I am all the verklempt.

My beloved Callyson and her beloved Spotts met here, in the comments, and then I guess they decided to love up on each other in a romantic manner, and then decided to legalize it like their commenter forebears Zyx and Meccalopolis just last month, and Paul and Holly, and Morgan and John from Hawaii (gone devastatingly soon), and … your former commenter colleague Shypixel, whom I married 10 years ago this coming November and in fact was 10 years ago this week wrapping up our 24-day first date and getting pregnant. And I know there were more of you. I just can’t put my finger on it in my bad old brain.

I think more of you should try it out in the comments and then move across country to be on each other. (There have also been a few that did not work out, which is nobody’s fault except that one guy. Don’t be him.) One good place to start (besides the comments) is at a Wonkette party. In fact, I did hear tell that a couple of our folks who met at our Chicago party liked the cut of each other’s jibs.

Why look at that, a party is coming right up! It’s the Wonkette Halloween party for YOU on Sat., Oct. 26, 7 p.m., at our home! Email rebecca at wonkette dot com, email header I AM NOT COMING TO KILL YOU, for our address! Free of course, but donations will be accepted for the Michigan Democrats!

Just don’t be gross about it; be kind, fair, and ethical; and no stalking or pushiness if somebody isn’t enthusiastically encouraging your approach.

I love you. Love each other. And Callyson and Spots, I’ll see you tomorrow and I am dying of happiness for you and for us all :D

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