Elon Musk Leaving It All Out On Field For Trump ('It' Is His Brains)
SQUIRREL!
Twitter ruiner and Skipping Dipshit Elon Musk attempted to hold a “town hall” on Twitter Monday night, to help get out the vote for Donald Trump, but like so many Spaceman Spliff productions, it was so glitchy that Musk gave up on it after only a few minutes. He then promised to switch over to a more conventional “Twitter Spaces” event that was less of a technical challenge, but that also failed to work, so the bored billionaire skipped off to something new that had his attention.
Friends and beloveds, the thing that distracted Elno was literally a squirrel. Honestly, we’re getting a little tired of the people who are running this Simulation dropping such ham-handed clues like that.
Now that you have the punchline you may not even want to bother knowing any more, but here are some details from CNN Bidniss, why not?
The event began streaming more than 20 minutes after its scheduled 8 p.m. ET start time. When the billionaire X owner joined, he promoted a podcast interview he did with Joe Rogan and offered to take questions. An operator then attempted to take questions from four listeners who apparently had been on hold, but the line went silent when he called on them.
The operator asked Musk if he believes “we will win” on Tuesday – presumably referring to Trump, whom Musk has supported to the tune of tens of millions of dollars.
Musk, trying to boost his guy, offered this astute political analysis: “Well, I think if people vote tomorrow, we’re definitely going to win.” And then he would be able to do for the US government what he’s done for Twitter: Tear down everything that made the place appealing and turn it over to Nazis and incels.
Unable to get anything to work like it should, Musk said, “Let’s cancel this, since we seem to be having some technical issues,” as one does when one really wants to elect their candidate.
Musk advised his eager listeners to follow him to a new “Twitter Spaces” stream, and it went just as well. It lasted a minute and died.
Then, CNN explains with only a link to an AP story about the squirrel thing,
Minutes later, Musk turned his attention instead to a social media-famous squirrel that was euthanized over the weekend. He also said he would not restart his Q&A and encouraged followers to listen to his Rogan interview instead.
And my god there was a fucking LOT about that fucking squirrel, which was a whole internet thing we completely missed. It belonged to some guy who’s big on OnlyFans, and a raid by state wildlife officials that resulted in the thing being euthanized — because it bit somebody, and they had to test it for rabies, not just for killing-squirrel funsies — made the fucking squirrel a martyr, as illustrated by this important meme Musk posted hours ahead of the glitchy interview.
Following the failure of the town hall, Musk was back to his usual regimen of shitposting, with a meme explaining that the death of the squirrel was surely the first domino in a sequence that would be followed by “Trump Victory” (with the squirrel in MAGA hat on Trump’s shoulder), “Balanced budget and great economy,” “Humanity becomes multiplanetary,” and finally, “Amazing future.”
Then he posted a weirdass fucking QAnon video made by a Nazi fan (link is to an article about it, not to Twitter or Nazis), a whole lot of shit from the Rogan interview (including his prediction that the vote today “is a fork in human destiny”), scary lies about immigrants, and today, a claim (with no evidence) that
The cavalry has arrived.
Men are voting in record numbers.
They now realize everything is at stake.
And somethere in there he retweeted this fucking work of AI art depicting a hypermuscular nude Elon Musk carrying a clothed Joe Rogan on his shoulders as Rogan lifted a naked fetus baby Donald Trump triumphantly above Rogan’s head. If that doesn’t win the election for Trump, we don’t know what will.
In conclusion, stay away from Ketamine and Twitter, kids.
[CNN Business / CNN-AP / Daily Dot]
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OMG, I’ve been waiting all my life to come up with a deranged MAGA meme parody that I could photoshop and we could all giggle about, and somebody beat me to it. As not a parody. 🤣🤣🤣
Booker on MSNBC...."Good luck, America, I hope it's a girl."