Hopefully These Are The Two Worst Men We Meet Today!
Hopefully.
If you don’t feel like reading all 921 pages of Project 2025, here’s a short summary! White heterosexual cisgender conservative men can do whatever they want, and anybody and anything else that might stand in their way can drop dead. This is why Donald J. Trump’s raping, frauding, racism, and other activities from creepy to criminal aren’t considered a liability, but a proud feature showcasing his enviably manly dominionism. It’s a big tent, with frauds, creepers, and animal abusers!
So be not surprised that two of today’s finalists in the ongoing Worst Most Disgusting Conservative Men Contest are two Project 2025 guys, Kevin Roberts and John McEntee! They’re no Mike Parson or Mark Robinson, so honorable mention? Latest update, McEntee’s been busted hitting on 18-year-olds while he was 33, and Roberts allegedly bragged about beating a neighbor’s dog to death with a shovel at a dinner party. (He denies it.)
John “Hot Johnny” McEntee, come on down! Remember him? Sure you do!
He was the bad boy Trump hired from Fox News to work as his personal aide, toting around his bags, and was quickly promoted to Director of the White House Presidential Personnel Office. There his job was to suss out the disloyal, such as staffers who treasonously listened to Taylor Swift, making the administration a vast wasteland of unqualified morons, including any young white ladies he found fuckable, regardless of their work experience.
We also later learned during that felony trial of Trump’s (you know, the one, just kidding there are so many!) that McEntee got Trump’s porn peener personal checks for payments mailed to his own home, so Trump could avoid the prying eyes of the White House mailroom.
McEntee derpwalked out of the White House in 2018 when he couldn't pass a background check, reportedly due to a gambling problem, leaving Stephen Miller to be the best-looking guy in the administration. But Hot Johnny pulled himself up by Peter Thiel’s bootstraps! Thiel gave Johnny $1.5 million to start a dating app for conservatives, The Right Stuff, which may have attracted more FBI agents ISO January Sixers than women wanting to date conservative guys.
In 2023 McEntee got a job at the Heritage Foundation working on Project 2025, assembling slates of lackeys who’ll be ready to pull the plug on democracy in America on day one.
But he still had extra time to work on his social media presence, by which we mean messaging 18-year-olds while he was 33. One was a freshman at North Carolina State University; he slid into her DMs on Instagram, asking her if she wanted a Date Right hoodie, and then started pushing to visit him in Los Angeles and bring a friend, “my treat.” “I think you’re a liberal,” he slimed, but “as long as you’ll be fun I don’t care.” Barf emoji.
The other teen was a conservative on his dating app, who says McEntee started messaging her with gross sexual things, and also tried to fly her to California. “He kept making comments about my age and how hot it would be to sleep with someone who was my age.”
He also found time to become a TikTok star with 3.3 million followers, where he eats food while sneering things like, “so I can’t have an opinion on abortion because I don’t have a uterus, but I can be a woman without one?” and “can someone track down the women Kamala Harris said are bleeding out in parking lots because Roe v. Wade was overturned?” Thousands of women — helpfully! — helped him track them down.
Then there was the time he laughed about giving homeless people fake money to get them arrested. Why he can’t seem to find any woman to marry, or even date him more than once, real mystery.
And Kevin Roberts, come on down! The Guardian reports that the president of the Heritage Foundation, the lizardy guy whose book JD Vance wrote an intro for, once bragged at a dinner party about beating a neighbor’s dog to death with a shovel, and fantasized about killing her puppies too. Just a delightful anecdote to relate while passing around the canapés. And he also bragged about it at work.
Roberts denied the story, so The Guardian sent a reporter to interview his former neighbors in Las Cruces, who confirmed that the dog, Loca, had indeed gone missing while Roberts was living next door, and had never been found.
The second American revolution will remain bloodless if you just sit, stay and roll over for a repeated shoveling to the skull, America!
Disgusting, all of them.
[Wired/ The Atlantic/ The Guardian]
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If one of my co-workers ever bragged about killing a dog with a shovel, I'd be like, "This is a conversation we need to continue with HR."
The fake money to homeless people makes me fucking stabby.