I HATE TABS! Tabs, Tues., Sept. 17, 2024
I HATE TABS! Tabs, Tues., Sept. 17, 2024
Get it? Get it?
Hey hey, ho ho, here’s some news.
Reminder: before all the other things that happened on Sunday, Donald Trump woke up in the morning and tweeted this on his Fake Twitter Social website.
So it’s fair to say he’s having a bit of a time right now.
Secret Service Director Ron Rowe gave a press conference yesterday and said the alleged attempted shooter at Trump’s golf course didn’t have a line of sight to Trump, and didn’t fire a shot, either at the Secret Service or anyone else. So … “assassination attempt” might be imprecise phrasing here? Commenting rules apply! [video via Republicans Against Trump]
Also sounds like the dude was there lurking for 12 hours AND APPARENTLY the Secret Service has been worried about Trump’s golfing for a long time, from a security perspective. [Washington Post / Also WaPo]
It’s safe to say that Republican Ohio Attorney General Dave Yost is total garbage, an unserious attorney general and an unserious man. CNN’s Brianna Kielar helped demonstrate that fully in this interview right here, about what’s going on in Springfield. [JoeMyGod]
Elected Republicans and their rage-Muppet minions on Fox News (come on down, Maria Bartiromo!) are actually going with this mouthbreathing conspiracy theory about there being an “ABC whistleblower” who rigged the debate by giving Kamala Harris the debate questions beforehand. Wanna know what, Republican idiots? Republican idiots, you wanna know what? We’ll tell you what, Republican idiots. Wonkette knew the questions beforehand too. How did we know? We’ll tell you how.
BECAUSE WE’RE NOT FUCKIN’ MORONS AND WE PAY ATTENTION TO POLITICS THAT’S HOW. [Media Matters / Media Matters / Mediaite]
The mayor of Jackson, Tennessee — a medium-sized town about a third of the way up the road from Memphis to Nashville — appears to be having to bat down some of his town’s own MAGA rumors about undocumented immigrants being dropped off on the regular at the old Kmart. So congrats, Republicans! Your little Nazi campaign is spreading! Imagine if you had anything to run on besides pigfucking racism. [Facebook]
At my Friday morning place this past week I wrote about how but one element of the sick MAGA Nazi blood libel campaign against Haitian migrants — on top of everything else! — was that I could just tell that for some of them, they were looking at this as a demented, violent kind of payback for the JD Vance couchfucking jokes. Not to minimize what they’re doing! Just digging through what makes these disturbed assholes tick, and there’s definitely been a sense of trolling with a lot of them, and from JD Vance himself, this sort of seething “take that” anger bubbling over.
Also a sense that many of them absolutely know they’re lying. It’s really telling that those people think this is on the same moral level as that. Then two days later, JD Vance admitted that he knows he’s lying. So come by and subscribe and share! [The Moral High Ground / audio version]
It’s “Be Mean To Jill Stein And Show The World What An Ass She Is” season again! Mmmmm, like Pumpkin Spice season! Thank you for your entry, Mehdi Hasan! [Twitter]
Oh no! There are rumors Donald Trump Jr. might not be stirring his penis in new punchbowls and stepping out on Kimberly Guilfoyle! And of course, the Daily Mail — which never makes mistakes — is writing about it just like Junior is a real celebrity. Click if you’re in to that sort of thing. [Daily Mail / More Daily Mail]
Everything Food & Wine is putting in our Facebook feed right now is absolutely gorgeous, and that’s why the New York Times isn’t even getting a recipe link this week. Look at this creamy chicken and wild rice soup. LOOK AT IT. [Food & Wine]
OK that’s enough, y’all be sweet, you hear?
Evan has a new side project called The Moral High Ground, you should check it out and subscribe there too!
Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter right here.
@evanjosephhurst on Threads!
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Da bear hates Tuesdays, hates whiny fascist narcissists, but loves Taylor Swift. It's your hed gif source: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/bear-ly-bubblin?r=angu9
And yer meme chat link for today: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/cef7dd96-dd68-4598-a5cd-241f6bdb5b1d
𝘖𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦 Shitler hates Swift, because she is everything he fantasizes himself to be, but is not, never has been, and never will be: smart, attractive, loved by millions, able to fill even the largest venues with a paying audience that won’t leave early, and an actual billionaire with no felony convictions who doesn’t have to spew racist slurs or desecrate veterans’ graves to get attention.