Idiot Roger Stone Fell For Trump Campaign Spear-Phishing Attack, BLAME IDIOT ROGER STONE
Well isn't that poetic?
According to the latest reports, it was Roger Stone who clicked the spear-phisher email from the hacker who targeted the Trump campaign’s emails.
It’s funny because he’s Mister Dirty Trickster himself. And the dirty trickster is getting dirty tricked? HA! We say HA!
How’d they get him, we wonder? “Click here for new face that doesn’t look like your bad face”? Or maybe something gross like “Give us your password and we’ll sign you up for some free naked sex swinger stuff”? He’s been into that sort of thing in the past.
To recap what’s allegedly happened so far: Allegedly the Trump campaign was hacked, allegedly, by Iran, allegedly (according to Trump), and this is something for us to all be upset about, allegedly. We wouldn’t want anything to put a stain on the pure campaign of excellent integrity Trump is running, after all.
So, according to CNN, sources say they got Roger to put his password in on Hot Hard Cuck Boobies Dot Edu or whatever, then, having compromised Roger, wanted to use Roger — who, no, is not an official part of the Trump campaign — to compromise people who are in the Trump campaign:
The hackers used access to Stone’s email account to try to break into the account of a senior Trump campaign official as part of a persistent effort to access campaign networks, one of the sources said. The hacking incident, which occurred in June, set off a scramble in the Trump campaign, the FBI and Microsoft, which spotted the intrusion attempts, to contain the incident and to determine if there was a broader cyber threat from Iran.
We are imagining emails from Hot Hard Cuck Boobies Dot Edu that said “Use your friend Roger’s code for 15 percent off an annual membership!” but we don’t know if that’s what they said. We imagine a lot of Trump staffers would go for it, though.
CNN notes that while Iran has denied it, and while the US government hasn’t publicly blamed Iran for this, according to its sources it matches Iran’s M.O. Plus, Iran seems like it’s trying to be big involved in the 2024 US election, in a number of chaotic directions:
US intelligence officials last month warned of an ongoing covert social media campaign by Iran to undercut Trump’s candidacy and to increase “social discord” in the US ahead of the November election. That activity has included creating fake news sites targeting liberal and conservative voters, according to Microsoft.
The US director of national intelligence, Avril Haines, has also accused Iran of attempting to covertly stoke protests in the US related to the Israel-Hamas conflict by posing as activists online and in some cases providing financial support to protesters.
Iranian hackers have, of course, also tried to hit the Democrats this time around, and Microsoft says both Iran and Russia may be “equally” bigly involved in the attacks right now. We would say this could be a moment where everybody should agree that it’s very bad for hostile foreign actors to target US elections and try to influence them, but hahahahahahahaha RUSSIA IF YOU’RE LISTENING.
Not only did Russia actively and aggressively work to steal the 2016 election for Trump in 2016, Roger Stone was an important part of that op.
For one thing, Stone lobbied hard for the Trump campaign to hire Paul Manafort, right about the time Russia was hacking Hillary Clinton’s campaign. Manafort, of course, was interfacing with a Russian spy and a Russian oligarch throughout, to undermine the free and fair American election.
But Stone was also convicted of many crimes — seven felonies to be exact, for which Trump later pardoned him — for lying about all the times he kept Trump apprised of upcoming WikiLeaks (AKA Russian) email dumps that would benefit him and hurt his 2016 opponent Hillary Clinton. Indeed, Stone told Trump ahead of time that the next big WikiLeaks dump would be about Clinton campaign chair John Podesta. And OMG, on October 7, 2016, it was!
What a weird day that was. The Trump campaign knew the “Access Hollywood” tape was coming out. They really wanted the latest WikiLeaks from Russia to drown that out. Indeed, Jerome Corsi testified to the Senate Intelligence Committee that Stone told him to get WikiLeaks (Russia) to "drop the Podesta emails immediately."
Ta-da, it happened!
Truly, we hate to see the 2024 Trump campaign targeted like this, and we all promise to treat it with the gravity it (GIANT FLAILING JERKOFF MOTION DOT GIF) deserves.
All that said, Chris Krebs, the former head of the Cybersecurity and Infrastructure Security Agency (CISA) — who Trump fired for making the 2020 election too hard to steal — tweeted this about the incident:
So we guess we should be taking this seriously after all.
That said, we are finding it remarkably easy to both take it seriously AND ALSO enjoy the schadenfreude that it happened to Roger, because fuck that guy.
[CNN]
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The circle is now complete. The ratfucker has become the ratfucked.
This is your occasional gentle reminder that Stone has been lying his entire adult life about being one of Nixon’s gang of ratfuckers. The extent of his involvement in the ‘72 campaign was being ordered to bring a pickle jar full of pennies to McGovern’s New Hampshire office to trick them into accepting an illegal campaign contribution. He’s been eating off his lies for the last 52 years.
A half-bright ratfucker wouldn’t have fallen for this obvious scam. Trust me, I know people.