JD Vance Hopes Pope Leo Has Learned That Racist MAGA Nazis Deserve Respect Too
Time to excommunicate yet?
There have been many hysterical and insane reactions from MAGA over the Supreme Court refusing to draw little swastikas all over the Constitution in its birthright citizenship ruling yesterday, instead electing to leave the text be for now.
But JD Vance gets his own post because, while he is always eager to spread a blood-libeling lie (or make one up!) about dark-skinned foreigners, he is also an (alleged) Catholic convert who wrote a book about Catholicism (which he is now an expert on) with a back country Methodist church/Appalachian meth dispensary on the cover (we joke about the church in the picture, whose fault this is not), who now feels qualified to lecture the pope on Catholicism.
Therefore, he’s lecturing the pope on Catholicism some more.
Appearing last night on the Laura Ingraham show for white ladies who scoff a lot like they’re sorority girls even though they’re old enough that they used to mash cloacas with Dinesh D’Souza on purpose, JD Vance explained what he hopes the pope has learned about immigration and Catholicism, from JD Vance, and also pick-me Secretary of State/National Security Advisor/Florsheim model/Mar-a-Lago bellhop Marco Rubio, who probably also thinks he is a better Catholic than the pope.
Ingraham, a Catholic herself and also the single adoptive mother of foreign children including one from Guatemala — HEY STEPHEN MILLER, LAURA INGRAHAM IS RUNNING A REPLACEMENT THEORY FACTORY! — asked Vance how he felt having this stinky pope who’s “deeply, in some regard, anti-capitalist.”
But JD, with a smile on his face like he just finished an afternoon delight with a slutty-dressed La-Z-Boy, explained that he’s not worried about the pope. He likes this back-and-forth they have going on, where he and Trump attack the pope and the pope finds the nearest opportunity to rebuke and humiliate them.
And he just really hopes the pope has learned something from Trump regime Nazis about what human dignity really is!
“I actually like this interplay between the pope, between Christian clergy, and between the administration. We don’t always have to agree on these issues, but I think the fact that we’re actually having the right conversations, that we’re pushing back when we disagree about how they’re applying a pragmatic principle of immigration policy, that’s a natural and reasonable thing to do.
“What I would hope that the Catholic leadership has learned from some of the things that me and Marco [Rubio] and the president have said about immigration is it’s not just about the dignity of the immigrant, it’s also about the dignity of the native-born people who have had their lives upended.”
You really smell the blood coming out of their gums when they say “native-born,” don’t you.
Anyway, if the first letters of each line of Leo’s next papal encyclical spell out “G-O-F-U-C-K-A-C-O-U-C-H-B-I-T-C-H,” this’ll be a leading contender for why.
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In another clip about faith and immigration — they were talking about faith, in case Pope Leo can’t tell because of how he doesn’t know shit about fuck — JD Vance explained that his new Catholic faith, which is also ancient, is what makes him act like a Nazi toward immigrants. (Just like the German Nazis, which were an explicitly white Christian movement!)
“My faith really motivates me to remember that our economic policy, it doesn’t exist for corporations, it doesn’t exist for Wall Street. As much as we want everybody to be successful, it exists to support the dignity of human beings. We want every American to be able to raise a family, to be able to support themselves in comfort and in dignity, that’s why we’re trying to bring investment and manufacturing back to the United States of America. That’s why we don’t like low-wage foreigners coming in and undercutting at the wages of American workers. We want normal Americans to be able to live a dignified life.”
You know how Scripture is always going on about the distinctions between American workers and low-wage foreigners.
It was pretty big workplace chit-chat, when Jesus and the disciples were washing feet and stuff, or that time Jesus said whatever you do unto the least of these you do to Jesus, and then immediately clarified that when you’re doing unto low-wage foreigners, you should think of Jesus’s nasty, masochistic side.
We of course also liked this clip where JD Vance explained how awesome it was that the white supremacist illegitimate partisan hack Supreme Court got so close to deleting this yuck line of the Constitution that’s Christlike to brown people. “We made some very compelling arguments, we have the better of the case.” If only Brett Kavanaugh and one other fascist had the moral courage to stand up für den Führer!
This is why the midterms are so important, said the vice president! What if Alito or Thomas died in the middle of doing some January 6 sexual roleplay with their wives and there wasn’t a Senate to confirm Trump’s next Nazi?
Has the so-called pope ever thought about that before?
The Daily Beast ends its coverage of this interview with a Navigator poll from last month that shows that Pope Leo’s favorability rating is “nearly 70 points higher among Catholics” in the United States than JD Vance’s, noting that he has net minus-12 favorables among that demographic, whereas American Catholics' net favorability for the pope is plus-57.
So maybe next time JD Vance is tempted to teach the pope how to Catholic, he should get his dick stuck in a sofa bed’s innards instead.
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Dude, you've been a Catholic for five minutes. STFU.
Obligatory whenever the subject of Jizzy D and his Catholicism crops up:
>>Every lifelong Catholic I've ever met is like "I think we're supposed to give this food to poor people" and every adult convert is like "the Archon of Constantinople's epistle on the Pentacostine rites of the eucharist clearly states women shouldn't have driver's licenses." <<
https://xcancel.com/agraybee/status/1537869930242113536?lang=en