Leon, Leon Likes His Money. Tabs, Fri., Sept. 13, 2024

Spooky morning news roundup!

KITTY! Tabs gif by your friend Martini Glambassador!

It has been TOO LONG since we’ve had a Maura Quint debate recap. Treat yourself! (McSweeneys)

Republicans think Trump did — looks around, closes the shades, leans in, whispers — poorly at the debate. (The Guardian)

New Harris ad just dropped.

I’m just kidding, or rather the Harris campaign is just kidding, because they tweeted the video of the entire debate and called it a campaign ad! Oh those clever tots! :D

Anyway, here’s the real one.

USA Today talked to experts and they claim that Trump threatening to lock up all his opponents is bad, actually! (USA Today)

Our Liz looks at how the thoroughly debunked EATING YOUR PETS got laundered to Trump. (Public Notice)

I was going to link you this CripDyke column about how now there are bomb threats to schools and public buildings in Springfield, before she spent the second half of her post agreeing with me. Well, what can you do. (Pervert Justice)

This guy would like to just get it over with and skip to the Satanic Panic already. He clearly does not have the same QAnon google alerts Robyn does. (AL.com)

The nitty-gritty on just how lawless RFK Jr. and the North Carolina state supreme court were in removing him from the ballot after the deadline, and how together they’ve colluded to put the kibosh on all early voting throughout the state. Shocking, and bad! (Slate)

What the fuck is wrong with people? This guy harassed this professor for seven years with fake nudes and plastering them everywhere for people to try to go to her house and rape her and shit. Now he is in jail. (Criminal complaint affidavit)

Just who are Taylor Swift’s fans anyway? Your mom, last night. (YouGov)

This is shitty. School lunch payment portals are charging fees of like sixty percent. Just universalize school lunch already, jeez. (AP)

BUT! Ben Sasse’s public school paid $38,000 for a sushi bar at a $176,000 holiday party for 200 people, or $900 per person, because University of Florida is J.Lo having a wedding I guess! (I don’t know what J.Lo’s weddings cost, I assume they were a lot.) Oh thank God:

Under new provisions negotiated in his contract after he announced his resignation [after just 17 months], UF agreed to continue to pay Sasse a base salary of just over $1 million through February 2028.

(WUFT)

Biden administration strengthens rules for mental health care coverage, so … some? Some rules? (Pro Publica)

Gen Z, save the Fount of All Knowledge! It’s important! (The Guardian)

My favorite thing is when the hedge funds buy the newspapers with the reporters’ pension funds as the hedge funds’ own collateral? Anyway, another excerpt from that book about Elno buying Twitter, why do you ask? (Vanity Fair / Character Limit at Amazon, Wonkette commission link)

Shut up Leon, you’re not colonizing Mars. It doesn’t have a thingy. (Defector)

I will cook and eat these drunken beans. (All Recipes)

EVAN POPS IN! This week at my Friday place, I’m looking at how the vicious MAGA Nazi lie about Haitian migrants eating cats is, among other things, their sick and violent version of the JD Vance couchfucking jokes. Come by, share with everybody you ever met and subscribe! [The Moral High Ground]

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