Newsmax Guy Will Have You Know That He Voted For War Crimes And Easter Sunday Expletives

Yeah. We know.

Apr 07, 2026

Over the past couple weeks or so, several rats have started running off the good ship Donald Trump — Joe Rogan, Theo Von, Tim Dillon, Bret Weinstein, Candace Owens, Alex Jones, Tucker Carlson and more have started distancing themselves to varying degrees, acting as though they are just shocked that Trump, the dove, would start another war in the Middle East. Owens and Jones have even gone so far as to say he should be removed from office, which is certainly interesting.

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But that is not to say that he doesn’t have his defenders. Tim Pool has hung in the middle with the “Okay, fine, this is bad, but this war was going to happen no matter what, so stop being mean to Trump about it” takes, as has Megyn Kelly, who says she opposes invading Iran but still says she would vote for Trump even if he dropped a nuke because of how she found Minnesota Democrats to be physically unattractive. Then there have been the diehards. Ben Shapiro. Laura Loomer. David Rubin. Steven Crowder, whose endless-goalpost-moving definition of success in Iran was especially amusing. Jesse Watters, who insists that bombing power plants and bridges can be done “humanely,” citing the Vietnam War as an example.

But some of his fiercest defenders — other than the anonymous freaks on Not Twitter — have been on Newsmax, one of the larger of the now 85,000 right-wing streaming news platforms out there.

Carl Higbie is the host of Carl Higbie Frontline on Newsmax, which holds one of the primetime spots on the network. His primary qualification for this appears to be that in 2018, he was forced to resign from his Trump-appointed post as Chief of External Affairs for the Corporation for National and Community Service (which runs AmeriCorps) on the grounds that he was actually too racist. Higbie, a Millennial who is somehow named “Carl,” is positively thrilled by the invasion of Iran. Could not be happier about it! Best day of his life! And if you think it was bad for Donald Trump to “Truth” about maaaaaybe doing a few war crimes on Easter, then Carl thinks you are a “noodle armed, whiny, pretentious crybaby.”

I mean, do you even lift, bro? Do you?

Transcript via Media Matters:

“Anyone who doesn’t understand why we would send the cavalry to get our own people home just doesn’t understand what the American military is about, because that’s what we do. And these noodle armed, whiny, pretentious crybabies — it’s just one guy. Bet you’d feel different if it was your ass out there 7000 feet up on a mountain, hiding in a crack of a rock to avoid being captured so they don’t saw your head off on live TV. But those people will never know that because those same people are too busy in the White House press briefing room complaining — they’ll never serve this country. They’ll render their opinions from on high in print, but they are completely irrelevant.”

It is worth noting that this guy would not even have been there to have his fighter jet shot down in Iran if we weren’t sending fighter jets to Iran in the first place. We didn’t want him there. We don’t want any American soldiers there in the first place.

“And Trump was in the Situation Room with no sleep for 48 hours. And then he basically was like, OK, we got him back. I’m done with this. Just unleashed on Sunday saying, this is his quote, ‘Tuesday will be power plant day and bridge day, all wrapped up in one in Iran. There will be nothing like it. Open the effing strait — he said the whole word — you crazy bastards, or you’ll be living in hell. Just watch. Praise be to Allah. President Donald J. Trump.’ What?
“And instead of being like ‘HELL YEAH BROTHER, THAT’S AMERICA!’ they’re out there whining about, like, war crimes. Not a peep, though, when I got hit by an Iranian built IED that killed three of my friends right next to me.”

Again … we are the ones who didn’t want you to be there in the first place. We are the ones who did not want Americans to die for oil or for George W. Bush’s daddy issues. If anyone is to blame for your three friends dying during Operation Iraqi Freedom, it is the people who sent them there. If you start a war, if you invade another country and start killing people, you don’t get to then be surprised and appalled that the people you are fighting fight back against you. That is literally what war is. That is why those of us who are sincerely opposed to war (unlike Donald Trump) do not think we should go around invading other countries like that.

I realize that there are a whole lot of people out there who really believe that the United States of America should get to go around doing whatever it wants to other countries without ever expecting any retaliation (or refugees!), but it ought to be clear by now that this is a highly unrealistic expectation.

“Like war crimes — get bent, I don’t care. I don’t really care about it. Basically, every left-wing network this morning and last night, by the way, Trump issues expletive-laden threat against Iran. Meanwhile, I’m like, ‘Yeah, man, that’s exactly what I voted for.’”

To be fair, it is exactly what he voted for — and anyone who voted for Trump and says they thought he was sincerely anti-war is either dishonest or very, very stupid. He’s not opposed to violence, he’s not opposed to human rights abuses, and he loves making big, poorly thought out, overtly dramatic moves and military parades. He was always going to get us into a stupid war. He supported the war in Iraq until it became extremely unpopular to do so, and his supposed opposition to war has always hinged on it supposedly not benefiting the United States, not on any actual ethical or moral grounds. So he has no problem going to war if he thinks it benefits the United States — or, rather, if it benefits him, personally.

To be clear, an “indiscriminate attack” on all of the power plants and bridges in Iran would, in fact, very much be a war crime. Attacking civilian infrastructure with no tactical purpose beyond terror, in order to force them to open up the Strait of Hormuz, is a war crime. It’s not okay to do war crimes, even when you think it would be very cool and macho to do them — least of all because it may very well lead to them doing war crimes against you.

The “let’s all just be chill about these ‘war crimes’” tack appears to be the only way his cheerleaders have to go. Another Newsmax guy, Bob Schmitt, had his own take on it — which was that the Iranians would actually be fine with bombing a few bridges in service of their “liberation.”

“We're trying to dismantle an Islamic terrorist regime that claims to have enough uranium for multiple nuclear weapons. That's what they told Steve Witkoff at the outset of the negotiations. And the media is looking for any reason to try and complain about this, including assuming the feelings of citizens in a country that none of these people have ever been to. The vast majority of Iranians want the regime ousted. They want them hung. And if a few bridges are lost in the process of liberating a country of 90 million people, I sincerely doubt most Iranians would mind at all.”

So weird, because last June Trump claimed that Iran’s uranium enrichment facilities — which would be necessary to making a bomb — were “completely and totally obliterated.” Was he lying then or is he lying now? But more importantly, it’s not even remotely clear what the administration would consider a “liberated” Iran to be.

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Or it wasn’t, until this morning when Trump announced his interest in liberating those 90 million Iranians from their very lives.