Pentagon Adopts Trump's COVID Strategy: Don't Count Iran War Casualties, So Nobody Is Dead Or Injured
The numbers are great!
The Pentagon’s website listing casualties in Donald Trump’s pointless war on Iran was changed without explanation this week, in what sure looks like an Orwellian attempt to memory hole last weekend’s deaths of four service members. The New York Times broke the story Thursday (gift link), pointing out that on Wednesday, the Pentagon’s “Defense Casualty Analysis System” (DCAS) showed that 18 US service members have died during “Operation Epic Fury.” Then on Thursday, that number changed to 14 deaths, which is what the site still showed on Friday.
The Times reports that three military officials, speaking anonymously, explained that the number of deaths was revised downward “because their deaths occurred after President Trump declared a cease-fire in the war in April.”
The Times also noted, without snickering or rolling its grey lady eyes, that the Defense Department’s acting press secretary, Joel Valdez, insisted that the changes were, um … let’s see … how about “temporary data disruptions” that don’t mean anything, so shut up, stop worrying about it.
Valdez claimed in an email — presumably written while he attempted to extinguish his trousers, which may have burst into flame — that the changes were mere “site anomalies” that were being resolved.
He went on to insist that the Defense Department “attempted to explain the anomalies to the New York Times ahead of publication, but given their lack of knowledge in this area, they proceeded to write a non-story,” because yeah, those dumb journalists acted like the change was somehow deliberate, how silly can you get? Valdez added, “We remain committed to ensuring the utmost accuracy of all casualty reporting.”
Yr Wonkette has not been able to confirm whether Mr. Valdez’s nose is measurably longer than before sending that statement.
You can also use the button below to donate an amount of your choice at Paypal, or we have a Patreon too.
Also too, in a detail the Times seems to have missed, yr Wonkette scared up the archived version of the DCAS website from Wednesday, which shows the number of “wounded in action” in Trump’s Iran War as 482, along with those 18 deaths.
By Friday, that number had also been revised downward to 420, which is a funny number because weed. Maybe Pentagon acting press secretary Joel Valdez will yell at us too, for failing to understand how computers work.
Again, maybe that’s because 62 wounded service members weren’t really casualties of “the war” because Trump and Iran were on a break. That’s some catch, that Catch-62.
The Times also noted that Donald Trump has continued to use the higher number of deaths even as he downplays US casualties from his stupid war of choice, pointing out that on Thursday, Trump “compared the toll from other American wars to the war against Iran, saying that even one death ‘is too many, but it’s 18.’”
At that same event, the Guardian reports, throwing some admirable shade for a serious outlet,
Trump again argued that the death toll from his war on Iran was low compared to that of Vietnam, the war he did not serve in as a young man.
“You know, we were in Vietnam for 20 years, lost thousands and hundreds of thousands of lives,” Trump said, inflating the actual death toll among US troops of 58,220.
Keep an eye out for Trump to start saying in coming days that there have only been 14 deaths, and that we have always been at war with EastIran.
The Times story also points out that the Pentagon has been less than forthcoming about what’s going on with Trump’s little excursion in Iran since his beautiful perfect ceasefire collapsed, slow rolling information on casualties and simply not holding any press briefings on the war since early May.
The Defense Department has said that disclosing Iranian strikes on bases where U.S. troops are housed would compromise operational security.
The Pentagon withheld information about three Iranian strikes last week in Jordan that injured dozens of U.S. service members and damaged several helicopters, according to several U.S. officials,
Besides, the Pentagon claims, US law only requires the Defense Department to report troop deaths, but not injuries.”
Then again, the press is the enemy of America, so why would the Pentagon tell Americans information the administration doesn’t want us to know? It might make us sad, and then how will Pete Hegseth get more hundreds of billions for the war?
And if we’re sad, we might not appreciate all the ways Great Leader has made America a far better place than it was under Joe Biden, who killed those 13 soldiers during the Iraq withdrawal when he personally allowed ISIS to suicide-bomb the airport in Kabul. As Trump explained to a rightwing podcaster in 2024, “These people shouldn’t have died. They died because of Biden and because of Kamala. They died just like if they pulled the trigger.”
Donald Trump, by contrast, is blameless in the deaths of US troops in the Iran War, if you find out about them at all. At this rate, maybe no one at all will have died by the time the casualty figures are accurately massaged.
Yr Wonkette is funded entirely by reader donations. If you can, please become a paid subscriber, or if you’d like to make a one-time (or recurring) donation, you can click this here button.
I served honorably in the USMC. To witness this corpulent, 5 time draft dodging POS "receive" the remains of our fallen chaps my ass.
This is one of the most fucked things out of this nonstop calamity that is Maladministration 2.0.
But yeah "Support the troops" unless you need to feed and house and actually honor them.
For Republicans, they are just little shields to hide behind with cheap Temu patriotism. The people in the unreconstructed party fly their U.S. flags, in the most obnoxious way, crow "Support the troops." They're cudgels to use to smear people against Republican wars of choice as disloyal, unpatriotic, what have you. And that gives the cover for Republicans to gain office and ruin all of our lives.