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Same Time Tomorrow, Jim?
Jim Jordan lost again, aw rats.
Well, boys and girls, the second vote has occurred, and it was even more of a flawless victory for Jim Jordan than yesterday. Today, Jim Jordan only got 199 votes. The only two people who didn’t vote for Jordan yesterday who did today were Doug LaMalfa and Victoria Spartz. But UH OH, DOHHHHH! Four Republicans went the other way, away from Jordan.
But don’t worry, he’s got us right where he wants us! This is probably one of the wrestling holds Jim Jordan taught when he was a coach who ignores team doctors sexually abusing his players.
Hakeem Jeffries got 212 votes and everybody cheered when it was announced. (Nobody cheered for Jim’s 199 votes, but Dems also cheered for Jeffries when he voted for himself. They are having fun.) This is because Democrats are a real political party made up of adults who are aware of what “governing” means.
Everybody also cheered and laughed for John Boehner getting one vote, from GOP Rep. Mike Kelly, so that was hilarious.
And then they went into recess. Shall we do this again tomorrow, Jimmy?
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So for the moment, the discussion is going to the idea of electing acting Speaker Patrick McHenry as speaker pro tem for a longer period, and giving him more power to lead more business for the House. But that’s mostly the media and some Democrats talking about that. What happens next? Don’t know.
Will Jim Jordan go again? Don’t know.
Will Jim Jordan try wrestling in a different weight class? Don’t know.
Will they do this again later this afternoon? Don’t know.
Will they do it the same time again tomorrow? Don’t know.
That’s a starting place. If Republicans absolutely require the assistance of Democrats to literally make the House function — after they allowed one unserious perv creeper with an unnaturally large and weird-looking head to blow everything up because he was tantrum-ming — they should make it hurt.
Stay tuned for more Republican failure of one kind or another!
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