Back On Up While I Roll Up My Sleeves: Tabs, Mon. April 20, 2026
News and things to read and watch!
Happy Monday friends! What did we miss while lolling about over the weekend?
The US has fired on and seized an Iranian oil tanker, all signs point to the war-operation not ending any time soon. (Al Jazeera)
The New York Times got the memos on how Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts made himself king of America via the Shadow Docket, blocking Obama’s climate policy (possibly bitter because Obama voted against Roberts’ confirmation, saying he “far more often used his formidable skills on behalf of the strong in opposition to the weak”), while letting Trump get away with shooting someone on Fifth Avenue. Christ, what an asshole. (New York Times archive link)
Just the President of The United States of America signing an order to fast-track the FDA’s review of hallucinogenic drugs because, he said, Joe Rogan told him to, and then begging on television for some for himself because he is so anxious and depressed. “Can I have some? … I’ll take whatever it takes!” What a joker! (CNN)
What’s he so anxious about? According to the Wall Street Journal, it’s having an Iran legacy as bad as Jimmy Carter’s. “‘If you look at what happened with Jimmy Carter…with the helicopters and the hostages, it cost them the election,’ Trump had said in March. ‘What a mess.’” Don’t worry, sir, your disaster is already MUCH YUGER! Biggest Iran blunder of all time! The stink of failure and desperation coming off that guy sure is getting rank! (WSJ gift link)
FBI Director Kash Patel is so rootin’ tootin’ mad at The Atlantic for publishing that story on Friday, “The FBI Director Is MIA” — all about how he’s a useless lush prone to freakouts who hinders cases and staffers worry might choke on his own vomit— he and Mark Robinson’s CNN-suer-lawyer Jesse Binnall are gonna SUE THE ATLANTIC SO HARD. (The Atlantic archive link / The Hill)
Air Canada is suspending flights to JFK, citing soaring fuel costs, dearth of passengers wanting to set foot in the US. (AP)
Trump’s BFF Sean Hannity has taken his Bible and stomped off and QUIT the Catholic church, he wants you to know, taking to the airwaves to lecture “run-of-the-mill Trump-hating Democrat” Pope Leo XIV about commenting on earthly affairs, as if that’s not a pope’s entire job or something, LOL! (HuffPost)
“Some Muslim voters were once drawn to Republican positions on family values and individual liberty, but as Southern politicians stoke anti-Islamic sentiment, many feel threatened.” (New York Times gift link)
Democrats Being Amazing Department:
No stink of failure there!
MAGA influencer Ryley Niemi has started a GoFundMe after, he claims, he confronted a gay couple holding an infant and called them pedophiles in West Hollywood and got punched and his equipment destroyed. (JoeMyGod)
The Wall Street Journal traveled to Florida to peek in the schools that billionaires there are building to teach their super-extra-special children life skills, like how to build an FAA-regulation airplane from scratch. Compared to private school tuitions in big cities, $50k seems a bargain, too, though the extracurricular supplies and therapy probably add up to at least an annual Mercedes. Wouldn’t it be great if we pooled all of our money so all children could have a decent … oh, never mind! (WSJ gift link)
Wonkette meetups in Hawaii, Montana a disco in ‘Frisco too?! HELLS YEAH!! Be Embarca-dere-o, or be square-o!
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“I could never again raise my voice against the violence of the oppressed, without having first spoken clearly to the greatest purveyor of violence in the world today – my own government.” - Martin Luther King Jr.
Same old, same old. 😡