They Mad? Oh, They Mad!
This is about the Trump guilty verdict.
We understand there was some excitement in Manhattan yesterday, what with a common criminal being convicted on 34 felony counts of falsifying business records by a jury of … well, not so much his peers as ordinary citizens of far higher character. There was audible rejoicing and a lot of corny jokes about the former occupant of the Oval Office now for the first time in his life having some convictions. There were understandable worries about how the crazies may react, which could well include “violently,” but we hope to hell not.
And there were a few too many media organizations who thought they were covering OJ Simpson.
On Fox News, Jesse Watters flailed to say something suitably profound and decided Trump’s life was “a Greek tragedy,” which works fine for us since we know that those are all about how a powerful dude is destroyed by his own hubris. Donald Trump is a whole walking, dozing, farting bag of hubris!
Watters also twote video of himself vowing to somehow pick himself up and soldier on, because he’s just that brave:
“Trump was found guilty, because he beat Hillary and because he’s about to beat Joe Biden. We may be wounded as a country right now, but we’re not going down. We’re going to get back up and vanquish the evil forces that are destroying this Republic.”
Remember how excited they all were about locking up Hillary? But Hillary wasn’t locked up! How can this be? Clearly, everything is rigged and it is TERRIBLE. Why can’t they lock her up now? Just you wait, when Trump wins because this made everyone in America mad, then Trump will lock you all up, all of you writing and reading this.
Former Maryland Gov. Larry Hogan, who’s running for the US Senate in an extremely liberal state and trying to emphasize his moderate, bipartisan credentials, offered — shortly before the actual verdict — a polite call for people to remain calm and respect the rule of law.
“Regardless of the result, I urge all Americans to respect the verdict and the legal process. At this dangerously divided moment in our history, all leaders—regardless of party—must not pour fuel on the fire with more toxic partisanship. We must reaffirm what has made this nation great: the rule of law.”
The statement was proper and measured and dignified, and Hogan’s call to avoid toxic partisanship was so intolerably horrible that Trump adviser Chris LaCivita declared Hogan’s campaign was over, and all the Blue Checks on Twitter agreed, at least in the replies to Hogan. (Oddly, didn’t see a lot of pro-Trump people telling LaCivita “you go, yay!”)
The overwhelming consensus among Trumpers was of course that the verdict now assures Trump’s election, because isn’t everyone else as angry as they are? Everybody they know is really really angry, after all. Utah Sen. Mike Lee (R) twote, “Congratulations, progressives. You’ve just guaranteed Trump’s election.” If they whistle just a little louder, we bet walking past the graveyard will be an absolute joy.
We’ll close with one of the weirdest, most reality-averse reactions we’ve seen so far, from Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, who must think Texas Trumpers are actually stupid enough to believe this:
“From the beginning of this sham trial, I stood by President Trump, and my support for him is stronger than ever. As Attorney General of Texas, I will unleash every tool at my disposal to fight this blatant corruption and political persecution spewing from New York and the Biden administration.”
That would be no tools at all at his disposal, because what the hell authority does the Texas AG have over a court in New York? But it sure sounds defiant! And as it happens, it’s a true statement: Having no tools to unleash, he has now used them to their full extent. Promise made, promise kept!
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I remember a long time ago (2016, ok, seems like eons) when all the sycophants were mewling "He hasn't done anything illegal, and if you liberals had anything you'd be taking him to court" ignoring the fact that the guy had his sleezy-ass Roy Cohens "handle" his illegal shit by abusing the system. Well now he has lost in court and lo and behold, it's not the great man that's at fault, it's the entire legal system (which, up until now, as mentioned, he played for his own benefit). When you are a cultist, that bar can just keep conveniently moving and moving to fit whatever works for your world view. What is amazing is that there are still so many now willing to take the ride. Sure, this is all the racists, but also the "gee, I dunno, Joe Biden just doesn't thrill me" types. Jesus, wake the fuck up people.
Anyway, I should not be surprised nobody in that camp seems to be backing away from that toxic orange tire fire. My faith in humanity keeps getting tested, but I still cling to it. And thanks to a jury in Manhattan, some has been restored.
Next week I turn 80. This has been a splendid present. Oh, and being in remission from lung cancer, also too.