Trump Did Not STOP EATING Because SAD, He ATE EVERYTHING Because MAD
You know, like people do.
Liz Cheney has many important stories to tell in her new book, but easily one of the most humiliating is the one where Kevin McCarthy had to drop all his important duties shortly after the 2020 election to run off to Mar-a-Lago and comfort Donald Trump. He wasn’t eating, you see. He would not eat hamberder. Could not look at hamberder. Could not look at ketchup. Ketchup just reminded him of the ketchup he would never be able to flip at the wall of the White House ever again.
He was inconsolable. He’s such an amazingly weak person that when he lost that election — by so many millions of votes — he retired to Florida and stopped eating.
“They’re really worried. Trump’s not eating. So they asked me to come see him,” said McCarthy to Liz Cheney, who was appalled.
OR DID HE?
Donald Trump says that’s not true, and he’s a reliable narrator. He says it’s so not true that it’s OPPOSITE true. He wasn’t not eating because too sad. He was too many eating because extremely angry.
You know how that’s totally a thing people do. Just stuff their faces in rage.
He explained on Truth Social:
“Crazy Liz Cheney, who suffers from Trump Derangement Syndrome at a level rarely seen before, writes in her boring new book that Keven McCarthy said he came to Mar-a-Lago after the RIGGED election because, ‘the former president was depressed and not eating.’ That statement is not true. I was not depressed, I WAS ANGRY, and it was not that I was not eating, it was that I was eating too much. But that’s not why Keven McCarthy was there. He was at Mar-a-Lago to get my support, and to bring the Republican Party together - Only good intentions. Liz Cheney, on the other hand, went on to lose her seat in Congress by the largest margin for a sitting Congressperson in the history of the U.S. She then worked with others on the J6 Committee to delete and destroy the evidence and findings of the committee.”
We love this insane batshit missive so much. Three reasons:
He says Liz Cheney’s TDS is “at a level rarely seen before.” As if there are medical journals documenting this and doctors are like whoa at this one case out of Wyoming.
He’s too stupid, after this many decades of life, to spell “Kevin.” He fucks it twice.
He’s such a baby toddler that he has to say the truth is the OPPOSITE of what Cheney said it was, even if that makes him look like 10 times as big of a moron.
Amazing.
As for Cheney’s book, the New York Times has some reporting that expands on what we’ve already heard about how incensed pigfuck misogynist Republican congressmen were at the impertinent lady in their midst who refused to cower in submission to Donald Trump.
In one meeting, Rep. Mike Kelly of Pennsylvania whined to Cheney, “It’s like you’re playing in the biggest game of your life and you look up and see your girlfriend sitting on the opponent’s side!” The women in the room shouted, “SHE’S NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND!”
There was more:
The men, she wrote, did not like her “tone” and thought she was not “contrite enough” for breaking with the party — and effectively embarrassing them and putting them on the spot for questions about why they still supported a former president who had tried to overturn an election and hold onto power.
“You’ve just got such a defiant attitude,” Representative Ralph Norman of South Carolina told her. Representative John Rutherford of Florida said she was too recalcitrant and not “riding for the brand.”
“John,” she recalled replying, “our ‘brand’ is the U.S. Constitution.”
Wow. MAGA Republicans are literal human garbage.
We hope Donald Trump doesn’t get so mad he eats them!
OPEN THREAD.
Evan Hurst on Twitter right here.
@evanjosephhurst on Threads!
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Nobody loves him, everybody hates him, he’s gonna go eat burgs.
So, my 92 year old mom has had a totally shitty two weeks.
Just before Thanksgiving she was putting some coffee in the above stove microwave and did something and fell (she's 5 foot, -2 inches.) She remembered to yell to Alexa to "Call Cathy", my sister and Amazon put the call through on speaker and my sister was able to come over right away and take her to the ER. She had fractured the ball joint on her hip and need to get screwed back together, which took an extra day because she had ate one butter cup candy and you know you can't go swimming, er, surgery-ing after that. They fixed her up and we got her home and notice her left side wasn't doing so well. After a bit off my sister and I (I had driven over from Seattle by then) going should we, we took her into the ER and they _think_ she might have had a bit of a stroke or some cholesterol build-up, jury is still out. Anyway she needed to have at least two weeks of PT at a facility. Yeah, try to schedule that on Thanksgiving. So we did get her to a place in Yakima after 5 days in the hospital to start her PT.
This is where it gets totally shitty.
It's 4:30am and she's in a wheelchair just out of the can from taking a pee and the overhead fire suppression sprinkler gives out and floods the room with black water. All of her clothes are ruined, but they did save her phone and hearing aid. They did get her into the shower and clean clothes on her and into a new room right away. But dog knows what the fuck was in that crusty old pipe. We're still trying to decide if we need to bring lawyers in.
I just got off the phone with her and she's doing better. She got some PT in today and we're hoping that this is the end of the really shitty part.
Kudos to my sister who is in Yakima and dealing with her and all the paperwork. All this while being a third grade teacher. She's fucking awesome.
I'm back down here in PDX with her dog Fred, who use to be my late wife's dog, before my mom stole him. He slept with WitP last night, so I'm seeing a pattern.